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PRIVATE ENTRY
23:14 Aug 27 2011
Times Read: 743
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PRIVATE ENTRY
22:21 Aug 27 2011
Times Read: 746
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05:11 Aug 24 2011
Times Read: 776
G7, how I love you. 6oz boiling water, 2 packs, and ice to the top = the happiest Joli ever!
03:14 Aug 20 2011
Times Read: 818
Bad poetry returns. Our newest installment...The Cannibalism Nursery Rhyme. Our re-imagined verse followed by its original inspiration. Don't forget to check out Requiem's journal!
Hungry Sir Monart
Puffed on his blowdart
Felling his sweet, young wife.
He sauteed her cute nose
Then deep fried her ten toes
And dined with his new fork and knife.
Little Miss Muffett
Sat on her tuffett
Eating her curds and whey.
Along came a spider
Who sat down beside her
And frightened Miss Muffett away.
...And Other Fancy Stuff
10:20 Aug 14 2011
Times Read: 869
What is she thinking,
The little barefoot girl
Who stands beside the shed?
She is the only one not looking there,
Beyond the edge of the photo.
One lady pins a pillbox hat to her head with one hand,
While another shades her eyes beside a scarecrow of a man,
Craned so far forward
That his neck becomes the bend of a pipe below my sink.
But the little girl with fly-away hair
Faces the other way
With an intensity too deep
For the doll-like features
That captivate me
As they take in the wall of a shed
And a few rusted nails
That held wire hide stretchers
Not so many seasons ago
When the hammer fell
On a tough brown thumb.
He swore in french,
His breath sizzling the crisp Fall air.
At the tug on his shirt,
He remembered himself
And leaned down for a tiny girl's magic kiss
Placed with earnest ceremony on the tender spot.
"All good now, 'sha'."
Just that.
Rusted nails on a wall that peels in the sun
And holds the gaze of a small girl child
Who looks away
For a moment.
Round Two01:35 Aug 14 2011
Times Read: 894
Our next installment of Bad Poetry. I present you with the Bacon Haiku Challenge. Don't forget to check Requiem's journal. And Captain Globehead got in on the action, too!
Ode to Bacon
Pig on the mountain,
How your trotters entice me,
Your haunches so plump.
Holy is your ham.
The sizzling scent of your flesh
Makes my mouth water.
If I were a god,
All things would taste like bacon,
Even mint toothpaste.
Keep porn. I prefer
Rubbing oil on tan tummies
Where bacon can fry.
Oh piggy goddess,
I entreat thee; baptize me
With thy holy grease.
Really Bad Poetry - With Your Hosts, Requiem and Joli22:53 Aug 11 2011
Times Read: 924
Requiem and I were goofing off one day and somehow ended up challenging one another to a bad poetry-off. We gave ourselves rules to follow:
1) Joli: It must have rhyming couplets - Hallmark style!
2) Requiem: It must have five stanzas, four lines each, 20 lines total
3) Joli: Meter must be iambic pentameter
4) Requiem: The topic must be: Lemmings vs Aardvarks
5) Joli: EACH stanza must have one onomatopoeia.
6) Requiem: The only foreign language flavor words we may use must be in Italian. At least one must be used.
We vowed then to unleash our festival of pain upon you gentle folk. So, without further ado, I present you with this poem which I hope that you will find truly bad:
Lemmingo and Aardvarkette
A dainty aardvark teen from Mozambique
Noshed on a cucumber and then yelled SQUEEEEEEEEEEK!!!
For there on Wikipedia she’d seen
A man so hot she felt he’d melt her spleen.
She tabbed over to her main Facebook page
And sent a friend request for him to gauge.
Oh how she’d WAAAAAH and then refresh the site
“Oh, Lemming Prince, my love you must requite!”
And so began their internet affair;
He praised and she tied bows into her hair
Until his Ex stirred up the drama pot
And posted that he SCHTUPPED her though he’d not.
Alas, before they even got to meet
She offed herself on cam and cried, “You cheat!”
Bereft, he flung himself from yon cliff high
“Merdaaaa!” Then SCHPLATT! Aww, man...E-love can't die!
Go check her journal tonight for the other installment of "Really Bad Poetry." Thank you, and good evening.
PRIVATE ENTRY
19:39 Aug 11 2011
Times Read: 939
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PRIVATE ENTRY
02:58 Aug 04 2011
Times Read: 950
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COMMENTS
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ThreeOfCups
05:31 Aug 24 2011
G7... it's "like a G6" but without Ke$ha!
BLOODLIFE
08:34 Aug 24 2011
Not sure on that!! lol
Requiem
13:08 Aug 24 2011
.... Does it tend to make you like a ferret with a double espresso? 'Cause if so ... When I get to Louisiana you HAVE to drink a few. o.o
sahahria
14:38 Aug 24 2011
I'd have to read the ingredients before I would trust it... lol the foodnazi has spoken (hangs head in shame)...