The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

It's silent.
Everything is still.
There is nothing to touch. There is nothing to hear.
Imagine almost feeling there were something right within your grasp, so sure there were something there. but when you reached for it, every other sense says nothing there.
Hearing, sight, touch, taste, scent... They say there is nothing there. What was it, why did that other thing lie.. It's so empty. There is nothing.. Does that make me nothing.
Everything, anything. Reaching, trying to grasp. Trying to speak, to say. Am I falling?
No.. No, it's still. This is not falling. Am I drowning? No, I can breathe. If this is what you call breathing. Why I am breathing, the air.. What does it mean. Why am I having thought.
This is all there is, isn't it? Why are I not angry. There is nothing to touch, nothing to see, nowhere to be. So.. What would anger be. A reason to pass the time different.
There was a time, I think. Or was I dreaming. Is this the dream. Where is the bed. Where is the pillow. I thought dreaming had support. Something to lay the head on. Something that feels surrounding and, enclosing?
No. No. That is a lie. Do not be taken by the lie.
If there were more than this.. No, do not think that. It is lie meant to stir the inside. What a horrible perception, more than this. What a horrible way to be. To there being something. It is safer not to be other than here. What if there something to see, to taste, to smell, to hear, to.. Horrifying. That would cause unimaginable realizationing of this. There being, and then suddenly there not being.
No. Please no.
This is all there has ever been. Otherwise.. Such loss would surely be too much for bearing. Why did the thoughts come to. Why. Am I moving? Is there direction?
Maybe I am falling. What is taking so long to collide. I see nothing, so there is nothing. Why have I become aware of this being. How does this end.
I dislike being. I dont remember why I have come to realize being.
This is wrong, this should not be. How do I scream.. Why though. There is nothing to hear me. I do not need anything, I need, I want one. The very least one. Not one, if possible, just some. Some of one. I am not greedy. Just some of one, and I would never ask for more, if only some. If not the very least that. Then knowledge of when this will end. So at very least, I can backwards count, to know when this will no longer be.
That must be too much, I am sorry for wanting too much.
How foolish I am. Must be why I am this. For wanting too much.
So I now neither fall nor drown.. There is no meaning to this, to not having.
What a dreadful almost thought, to have and then not.
Who do I ask forgiveness so am I heard? How do I ask so it is correct?
I think I am understanding?
With no some... No, that is too much. One is too much. I must learn this
With no... one to see, there is no sight.
With no one to touch, there is no feel.
I think I am getting it, please let me know if I am correct?
Hello?
Right...
With no one to hear, there is no sound.
I am getting it.. Must not forget again.
Must not forget again.
This is.. This is all. No thing is all.
Accept this. Be content with this.
With no thing. Do not again ask for any of one.
Selfish me.. I am sorry. I apologize dearly.
...
To whom?
There I go again. I am so stupid.
There is only this.
There is only this.
Because there is only this.
Just wait and maybe this will end.
How to pass the time..
Yes, I am truly foolish.
I do not have time, it will come and go, I do not own it.
My arrogance surely must be reason why there is this.
For thinking I am reason for any time, any thing, any of one.
I am understanding now, I think.
I do not deserve any of one, and so there is only this.
Have to remember.
If only to not ask again. To not expect. To not think there may be.
Then maybe this lesson of mine will be properly learned.
Maybe will end, maybe no longer be. I just have to learn.