just another exp or two14:25 Nov 14 2009
Times Read: 628
thank you for not thinking im not just babbleing hehe we need to help me spell and piece it together and make a great book.... my dear i enjoyed the way you broke my long winded story apart and annalized it wonderful work...i was sooo young and yet i felt like i had 100's of years of knowledge.
i have heard it is possable to summon beings of your own desire to do deeds for you mostly called golems ...but in all truth i hear this takes an extraordinary power and children are open conduwits to such things because no one says these things are not real and when you believe you find power and when you exp the power you believe and that makes it very strong magick it is quite possable that i summoned things from another realm or from with in ...i been tempted to call upon the menicen bert figure and face off with him i still own the toy box if i felt safe i would not break it i would climb in again one nite i sat looking at the box meditating and i felt something evil from the box its self i thought that was odd but thoe i may become a but frightend i dont like to say afraid cause i think there is a differant meaning to those words just slightly changed
oooooooo i feel things in the earth others dont at age 9 i srarted collecting agates and it was not hard to find them and i started finding iron pyrite and more and feeling vibrations in certain locals i love going in caves and around water falls the treasure is sooo very preshish the feeling like static electiricy flowing thru you it is wild and i have a natural navagation system i dont normally need a map but on rare occastions i think maps are lame everyone should have a built in gps so to speak and iam talking a natural one not some mivro chip
ooooo iam so glad you dont think this as babble i have shared a very secret near and dear topic with you...i can feel your words with sincereity behind them being inquizative wanting more :P it is almost like an anticapation you cant wait to see the next log giggles tell me if iam close?
in hospital near death exp patients report all sorts of things to this day they will try to logic their way thru but it is a differant door for each case iam sure of this they actually have survivers groups which i dont feel the need to share i have died on the opperation table more then once(oooi thought 4 kinds of cancer was enough iam working on cancer 5 now it is so close to my brian i feel iam done fighting this battle and iam ready to go with out the treatment i may have 3 months tops) no sympathy things happen for a reason may be when i die i find the right person i may be able to transfer my knowledge and energy to a worthy student (hopefully you) i say that becaue of your genuine enterest
gypsys are a rare breed and i always like to think of my self as one but my skin color and hair are all wrong but i seem to have a strong pull to their culture
i do think i will take your words to heart and do more studying like i should be doing anyways but iam damn addicted to the site
i was told by a woman at age 1 a jelious relative burried something of mine with a dead person and cursed me LOL if thus is a curse then thank you my mother and i think we know who it was see everyone both mom and dads side had blonde hair blue eyes and for what ever reason my grams sister got the chestnut brown hair and eyes and ooo yes my dearly dear parted great great grandpa glenn he had his flaming irish red hair ...my mothers folds are irish/ pa dutch my dads family french/blackfoot indian quite the combo
i do believe traumas cause a more psi out like a mother lifting a car off her child but she could not do it any other time and this i believe is a valnurable time so the flood gates open and gives you the extra sometging you need...traunas and such can make or break a person
yes i remember watching seaseme st and electric company hehe sigmund the sea monster and hr puff and stuff
well the whole book thing was wild i saved it for a couples years i cant explain it but with all the shaken of the bed and stuff i think something was comming out of the book after me thoe not in a menacing way cause i have no fear when the bed shakes i welcome it and ask it to stay if it is friendly and means no harm but if it is menevolent go back from wence you came ... for the whole family who will not talk about it they had great fear of what i was doing
i met my friend about 3 years ago and not knowing him at all he jumped into my taxi and i looked at him waiting for him to tell me wherre he needed to go and i blurted out iam sorry you had a death of a close friend named laura and you worked hard to get her a proper wiccan barrial and she is thank full (the parrent burried her cathlic style) he said please stop the taxi and he doubled over and puked he siad i have told no one this and you tell me her name and what i did and such i said i was sorry i was off base to relay the message on the clock but his energy pattern was oddly attractive and then i asked him if him and his boyfriend were fighting he said bitch your scarring me about the isle and waterfall thing he claims he remembers before my idle appered and i do believe that this is the place we end up in the beutyfull people are trees and iles and waterfalls the evil people are trolls and ogres just an asumption and i believe it to be an utamate utopia
the good whispers and suff i think is my grandfather watching over me the bad i have no idle who or what this might me,
On 11:25:40 Nov 14 2009 (-0 GMT) autarkis wrote:
LNDG,
Sorry this took so long to reply to, I had to copy/paste it to a notepad in order to break it down a little better. Thanks for waiting!
You said:
when i was 3 years old my mother would buy me blown glass figures i loved them so much i slept with them and they broke and i rolled around in broken glass never getting cut
I say:
That's interesting. I know that feeling where you get addicted to the motions of things like that. I'm not saying yours was an addiction but there is some sense of it.
You said:
then i use to take all my toys out of my toy box and lay in it like a casket this was one of my favorite past times now i urdge you not to laugh but if you got to i will understand ...this figure appeared to me and for some reason i felt fear and i would get out of the box and the figure would reach for me but i closed the closet and he was gone (the figure was a life size bert from seaseme street) he carried a shiney knive i did this several times and one time i forgot to close the closet door he chased me down the long hallway we had in our house i tried to scream and my vocals were frozen nothing came out i rounded the wall and saw mom and told mom to come look but bert was gone and i never seen him sence ...the doll freaks me out till this day.
I say:
This is very peculiar. What would you call that? Projecting your power into a physical being of some kind? Promoting your fears so that you might conquer them? I'm not sure what you did back then ... what I can say though is that you lived in a realm where no one stifled your energy to the point that you limited the power you had from birth. You were able to embody your energy into something you could see and deal with. The fact that it is Bert only tells me that you watched sesame street whether you remember or not, and that's the shape it took because yes, you created it. I'm not saying it was fake, there was certainly something that came from you though; That much is certain. If it was a being that tormented you for some reason, you could have trapped it into the likeness of Bert. That's one theory. Otherwise, it was your own personal demon again, trapped into what manifestation you could create at that time.
You said:
drums and chanting would start again no matter what time it was this one day the sliding glass doors had been locked and i had to run to the front door and two yellow belly racers (snakes) crossed my path.
I say:
Drums. Hmmm, this one confuses me. There is however, a point where you realize that the Earth you are standing on now has had many forms and shapes and energies upon the same soil. It's not hard to imagine that you're able to glance those energies at times and hear things that others can not hear. You should work on this one more, it's more interesting than you think. The snakes though, that's another interesting part. It might be a heightened perception and a sixth sense when you are close to something which can harm you. Again, more reason for you to take interest in this.
You said:
two fuzzy brown eyes comming out of the wall and i jumped out and went to sleep with mom and dad who thought it was the storm and others have tried to explain this by saying it was a reflection of my eyes on the wall from the lightning sorry but i have blue eyes not brown and i did not have a brown fuzzy face. wooooo ok that took care of age 3
I say:
Again, you're able to manifest your energies into a physical form. This is something I would say gypsies can do quite easily, because they work with illusions and making people see things that are (or were) not there. If you could work on this ability, try to make it simple at first and something that is not supposed to move. This could also be the energy of something near you or something inside of you, and you're discussing the point where it is finally drawn out of your subconscious; This can ALSO be moments where you are vulnerable which again, leads me to think that you have some precognitive ability for danger.
You said:
now age 13 fighting with my mother so bad i threw my self down on my bed screaming i wish i were dead i bumped my head but not hard and i saw me on the bed but i saw me on the ceilling at the same time and it was over that fast.
I say:
Same thing, your energy allows you more power when near trauma.
You said:
one time i went to get my book it was disroyed there were claw marks like if you were to fold your thumb across your palm of your hand like your showing someone i need 4 of those and spread your four fingers apart that is about the length apart the claw marks were the whole center of the book looked like a mini tornaddo ripped it up and pieces of the book were taken up inside my bed (it was a brand new mattress)
I say:
This one is very confusing to me. I'm not even sure where to begin and I would rather meditate on it for a time before giving an answer. There's no way energy could be attached to this book before you got it. That wouldn't be my first conclusion. But because you seem to have energy swirling around you and it has the potential to jump in and out of different states, it's not unbelievable to think that you had a lot to do with what happened to this object. I can't say they were claw marks though, not without seeing it. I fancy the idea of someone or something trying to destroy the book or hide it from you, and then deciding that it would do no harm to allow you to be with the object in the end. I'm just not sure who or what it was though.
You said:
when i was about 20 i went to this wonderful place a small isle near the base of a waterfall there were unicorns and other mythical creatures there and i felt like i was the ruler of this place but there was some ugly war between some ogres and trolls and i walked upon the water and ran thru the trees of the forest
I say:
I still lean towards the fact that yes you can see and manipulate energy in ways others can not, but that you shape them into the things that interest you the most and the things that make the most sense to you. However, let us include this next part:
You said:
...i told my one friend about this and he looked deep into my eyes and called me a bitch he said he wanted to know who put an isle at the base of his waterfall for he was the waterfall and iam the isle and now i wonder is this the end the destination we are suposed to reach in OOB i did not give my friend much in the way of details and he knew things sooo i know i was not dreaming most people said awe what a cute dream.
I say:
Dreams... Memories... Same things to me. Is this a friend who grew up around you? How long have you two been in contact with each other? Do you like the same things? I'm curious to know why you and that person shared the same space in that realm. Or is this, as you say, the end of some travel? I can not really say it was a place that truly exists, but since you and someone else discovered it (or created it) it does exist now.
You said:
now for the last 20 years i get whispers in my ear when no one is around i get people touching me i look around for the dog and nothing sometimes the voices are filled with malice and other times very peaceful and if i do seem to start a OOB sence iam not prepared for it i get this falling feeling i try to yell but nothing comes out of my mouth and i slam hard back into my body
I say:
This last part you say leads me to believe that something is near you and won't let go of the connect that you're giving it. Yes, you're the enabler, but I still can't figure out if it's you doing it or something else near you and you just tend to shape it into something every now and then when you don't realize it. I would recommend that you don't "create" energy; Work on "mutating" energy that is already there, just as you do with fire and air, but do this in such a way that you can (best words here) draw it out or into something else. If you're a 'witch' as you say, then perhaps you can contain it so that you might study it, but that is highly dangerous. If you could do this with someone else that has nothing to do with what ever it is that is usually the cause, that would be best. It wouldn't be wise to confront something unless you were confident you were the 'master' of your abilities.
You said:
now i want you to please be honest and tell me what all you really think about these things even if its negative because in my heart i know them as truths and no one will change that and your opinion good or bad means alot to me thank you for listening to me babble
I say:
this is not babble, and you have my word, always, that I would both never "laugh" and always give my interpretation as accurately as possible. The things you think about, even mere thoughts, are physical. Never forget that. You however, are able to manipulate them into your own shapes. I wouldn't be willing to bet that you couldn't take control of your dreams more than most people, (lucid) which is also more real than most people know, the dream world I mean. It's a place in your head, and looking back, dreams and memories are the same.
I'm pleased we're this far along with our relationship though, it takes a while to get here, but it's worth the wait. Remember though, my answers could never be definitive. My words are merely here on your screen to add to the puzzle of which you will have to work out for yourself; My words are part of a greater picture that you will have to see with a wider angle of perception one day. Let us hope you are not in danger again before you're able to discover betters ways to do it though. There must be another way.
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remember when you tried to take us threw a mirror with mirror magick what a dreaded exp i rubbed the oils on my mirror and lit the candles and we was mid teeny bopper age she said we started there and it was cold and she wanted to return that would be great....cause i did not know what to expect on the other side she slept on the floor and she woke with all my horses on her chest and they wear glued solid to this desk...so that sounds unlikely but true
oooo yes i left out my favotire thing it has only happened when i fight with my motther things fly off shelves, one time i was getting dressed fancy and im walking to get my phone and its about time for me to put my perfurm on and mother is screaming at me i said clamly step off but my whole inside shook i wanted to beat her up but she is not normal she has a very rare bone disease and is only 4 foot 4 inches and everyone thinks she is a midget and she is not but thats another story all the sudden i see the perfume i wanted to put on fly off the tray accros the room and break above the bed on the wall.... my boyfriend thinks it was my grandfather telling us both to stop LOL noooo dont buy that story but it is probable and my own belief in this is my pent up anxiety and anger manifest in a poltergiest manner which is common in younger girls around puberty LOL thats when it started but i still have not out grown it LOL and i do believe that there is some guardian angle watching over me walking down the street i have exciting news to tell my mom i was gonna use the phone booth but damn i was thirsty and i wanted a drink but i was stoked about getting the info to mom and i decided to get a drink and when i first came out and the phone booth was replace by a car and a dead elderly lady at the wheel of her car dude fate was with me i was shaken soooo bad knowing how close that was....and not many people can say they swam at the very top of the horseshoe falls in niagara i walked around those falls every inch of ground everyday for 7 years like clock work 3 sister islands were my favorite get away out on the third isle no rails nothing you just stand ubber close to the top of the falls and the next time i went there had been a storm and a boulder and a tree made like a little swimming pool me and about 4 other people in the hot summer swam there everyday for about a week but of course we all got sick as hell from the toxic crap they keep dumping not many people know about it but we knew and we were sick so a week later we go back to our spot and the bounder and the tree washed over the falls dude that would have been death for sure
my boyfriend is getting the boot after 15 years he has little to say or he gets cocky and will rashinal things out and will not weigh the rashinal against the possable fates of us gifted ones which he thinks is bunk his negativity brings be down dreadfully hard
oooo now no sympathy here okay? i been thru 4 bouts of differant cancers well yippy iam now on number 5 and i think iam gonna refuse treatment this time and let it hit my brain its in my jaw bone so it dont have far to go ... shed no tears for me my friend because i believe i will be in a better place i never had a celebrated birthday even as a kid LOL iam very bitter about that so i would love people to be happy and celebrate my death and be happy with lots of loudness music and people screaming we may miss you but we know your happy now aaaaaaaaa i almost teared up i hate crying to me it is a sign of weekness
hugs my friend may be you will get rich from my tales as i say every word is how i recall it and i leave it to the reader to think what they will special or insane LOL
take care and never worry about the time it takes to return a message that is silly we are friends and we have lives hehe well for a little while anyways
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