VampireWitch39 had a link in her journal, promising a smile if only you'd click on it. She LIES! I sat at my desk at work, crying like a baby. Thankfully, everyone else has gone home. WOW...this is so wonderful. Click on it. VW, thank you for posting this...next time, have a mascara disclaimer, though!
(Beastt, if you don't click on it, I will beanbag you. That goes for the rest of you men, too!)
Above All
I've had a few questions about "Singing Snowden's Song." I almost never do this, even with close friends, but I'm going to talk about where I was and a bit about the piece.
Singing Snowden's Song
I am here for me.
I have only ever lied to myself.
Don’t look down.
There’s the trouble -
My blind faith can see.
And you hang by your knees
From your fucked up plans,
Your frayed trapeze.
Christ, I’m scared and old.
I’m cold. I’m so damn cold.
Trembling the cracks
Where your madness pours forth.
I don’t have enough bandages
Never will be enough bandages,
And you’re spilling all over me.
"I'm cold,"
"I'm cold."
"There, there,"
"There, there."
Snowden is a character in "Catch-22," a novel written by Joseph Heller. Throughout the novel, Yossarian, the main character, relives the moment Snowden died on a bomb run mission. Yossarian goes to help Snowden and treats the wrong injury, a leg injury. When he discovers that there is a chest injury, he opens the flak suit and Snowden's insides spill out everywhere. It is THE experience that forever changes Yossarian.
Snowden keeps repeating that he's cold. Yossarian mumbles mechanically "there there" each time. Yossarian has discovered "Snowden's Secret," without a soul, man is garbage.
Allusion is a common literary device in writing that is used to evoke a response in the reader by calling up another piece of writing, art, film, etc... It can be very effective IF the allusion is well-known to the intended audience. In this case, I confess, I purposely chose a somewhat obscure reference and didn't cite the title. I was writing for me, and I knew that I got the reference, so indulge me with a little forgiveness there.
With the tidbit of scholarly (and likely boring) background, those of you who wanted to understand where I was can probably take a good guess, but I promised. This kinda goes against my personal rules about writing...by telling you what it means to me, I kill it as a living piece that the reader gets to experience.
I was thinking through the people in whom I have chosen to invest my heart. I feel like Yossarian sometimes, just going along and flying my missions. I have good friends and I'm selective about my "crew," those whom I trust to help get me back to the ground safely. Just when I believe I'm in a rhythm and have things and people where I feel sure that all will be well, the cracks begin...tiny at first, and easy to misdiagnose or ignore all together. But cracks in people spill things forth eventually - madnesses just below their precious and much-loved faces.
Unexpectedly, there you are...on your knees before someone, trying to mop them up and press the cracks back together. It is a moment of terrible truth, we are helpless before such things. We can love, but we cannot repair the real holes. For me, as I wrote those words, I was not thinking that man is garbage without his soul...I was thinking, I am helpless despite mine.
Special thanks to those who thought to ask me to do this. I'm grateful for your reading and troubling to write to me in comments and messages. You inspire me to keep plugging away at my little scribbles.
COMMENTS
Thank you for sharing this, it has given me a new insight into this poem and I think has enriched it for me:)
excellent piece of opening.
Some days I'm Yossarian; others, I'm Snowden.
What is it about the eyes of a cat? Look into these eyes. They seem to hold onto you a moment before you can tear away. It seems to me that these are the eyes of someone who has been here a long, long time...ancient eyes. What do you see there?
Model: My cat, Savvy
COMMENTS
Such wise eyes. I miss my Orion... He has such beautiful old eyes.
Cats were thought of as gods for a reason. My cat Breagha (Gaelic-beautiful) had the most intense golden eyes.
Savvy-Let go I got stuff to do!
Pure unadulterated evil:( It is probably plotting to murder you in the night. I bet it has thumbs too!
A very wise animal indeed ...
But look at your Savvy, is there anything of yours that is not 'poetry'?!!
The eyes are the window to the mind and cats have very keen minds. It's little wonder the Egyptians took such special notice.
I see the sly cleverness of a master thief, knowing he has only gotten better over the years, not slower, looking at something he wants, and will have, regardless of your best efforts.
I see instinct restrained...
A "fine, I'll play along for now" kind of mindset.
Cats are yummy. Best served with steamed greens...heh. 0.o
Ok, ok. I don't eat cats, well at least not anymore, but if I did I'd save the eyes for you to look into :D
Like all the knowledge in the world is there if you just understood how to get it. By the way Savvy- you are a lovely cat. :)
What is a miracle? Here's what the dictionary says:
mir·a·cle /ˈmɪrəkəl/ [mir-uh-kuhl]
–noun
1. an effect or extraordinary event in the physical world that surpasses all known human or natural powers and is ascribed to a supernatural cause.
2. such an effect or event manifesting or considered as a work of God.
3. a wonder; marvel.
4. a wonderful or surpassing example of some quality
So, Jo...we know you. This is your clever lead-in to some point. Just get to it. OK!
A young man approached me on this site. I know he doesn't have a lot of money. What he did have was a desire to share what he does have. I always know the sincere giver...they shine. The sincere giver says, "It isn't much, but..."
This gentleman said basically those same words, indicating that he wanted to give to people who had more need than himself, but he also had a concern that after some discussion, I came to understand was a need not to disclose ANY personal information like return address, etc... But his desire to give what he could never wavered, even as we worked through how we could receive his gift and acknowledge that it came from him.
We worked out a way and in came his envelope today. I shared with him that it was here and his reaction almost knocked me off my chair. All exclamation points and "Yay"s. He celebrated the receipt of his gift! Don't miss that point; it's an important one - he CELEBRATED his gift!
Why is this a miracle? Because hearts like that just are. It is inexplicable and lovely. It is inspiring and warm. There are no small gifts when they are given in this way, with joy and celebration. I want to be a better person because of this kind of spirit that DOES reside in people. You simply cannot tell me otherwise because I see it every single day.
After receiving this gift...not 15 minutes later, a woman walked in from the street and handed me two $20 bills. We asked if she wanted to leave her name and she replied with "just Michelle." She said, "Use it to buy some canned goods or whatever you need." Neither of these two will get "properly" thanked by me or the Center. No letter for tax purposes, no fanfare at all.
I don't even know where they are in their own personal walks of faith. It isn't mine to know and that's ok. I can say that they both gave in ways that could humble some faithful donors who have begun to give as a task to be completed on a list. Makes me think about that a lot...what is the point of doing something wonderful if it doesn't fill you with wonder?
COMMENTS
That was really beautiful. Ther's always hope!
More good news, and another inspiring story! ;)
:)
That is so wonderful; it is hard to feel jaded about humanity when you see gems like that shining.
I believe I know the young gentleman you are referring to, preferring post rather than electronics :) He is a lovely person and I hope he achieves his aspirations on here. I hope those envelopes keep on rolling in Joli. A few others approached me about that also, and as always I refer them to you :) Isn't it wonderful we have raised almost a $1,000 so far!
COMMENTS
Ahh it's great to see him up and about.
While I miss his style with the tshirts- I am very glad he does not need them anymore. :)
He looks wonderful!
Wow, that is some amazing healing! He looks really healthy and happy there.
Your thumbcat looks like the devil though:P
Nice too see he got through this and is happy on the other side.
Yay =) This news and the photographic evidence made our morning!
He's looking good!
I think the cat was saying "Yo! Breath mint needed here" :)
The Yellow Hydrant rides again!
Yea, Meatball!
There are words that are so hard to say. The very breath of God was supposed to be enough to speak things into existence. I hate speaking my weaknesses into existence, as though somehow, if only I don't speak them, they will not be real.
I pause over your words...your "flesh and blood words and I stumble over a surprise of my own making. Jealousy. Where did it come from? Lying there dormant, ready to spring forward without warning. I am jealous of her words, that you taste and try on like some cotton batik dress I step out of and decide not to buy.
I dream you, wanting only my words to hold you thrall. I will write you swings and play yards, spiriting you into my world on a clever rhyme, spinning your imagination like a merry go round. We walk together and though we are both in love with the sound and taste of words, we don't talk in this dream world. We walk and we see. We lie together and we point. We touch. A world where we are the words.
What would delight you? I walked along an old nature trail tonight...take my hand...no more words.
COMMENTS
I am very jealous of the area you live in, it is so photogenic :)
Damn, both your words and your pictures are so beautiful, especially that last picture. It took my breath away. The second from last picture has wooden stalagmites, I really am jealous of your land:)
Stops copies me. :|
Eerie.
I love it.
That was just beautiful.
That was a delight and Thank you for the walk.
Again, thank you for the walk. To see what you see, it is beautiful.
Incredible. This is what I want to see when I am in those southern lands. This.
I am wordless.
& your words, always your words.
The world around us is beautiful, mysterious, fragrant, inspiring, dramaitc and so many other things all rolled up into one...
...seeing it through your eyes and feeling it through your words always makes it even more impressive.
COMMENTS
Mmmmmm. orange blossom on a summer's night breeze..the smell of rain's approach...
One of my earliest memories was the smell of a library.
..wet leaves, shortly after rainfall.
Pine and mist.
Even better in combination.
The only two things I remember about my father's father were smells. The scent of the dry cleaning on his jacket, and the smell of his cherry-vanilla Cavendish pipe tobacco.
Ohh definitely books, though the ones post 1940 tend to be a bit stinky. The smell of rain and the dew before dawn. The smell of blossom coming through my window while I type. An unusual one for you too, cow dung. I grew up pretty much on top of a dairy farm and you start to really like the smell after a while:)
I never anticipated that people would comment with their own favorites smells. I LOVE reading them! Thank you for sharing them!
A pine and cedar bonfire on a late August evening.
Fresh alfalfa hay. The musty hint in the just rain touched air.
The smell of napalm in the morning
Sorry, couldn't resist :D
It's funny, but the smell of docks. That tar or pitch smell around boats docked. Yeah, brings me back to good memories. There is this funny sage-like smell that catch every now and then from a brush area that brings me back as well, like juniper crushed maybe, dunno. I like your pipe tobacco thing though, I have exactly the same thing going on. Generational thing maybe? Not many smoke pipes today. Which is both good and sad. Hey, thanks for doing this one up, pretty cool.
Wow Irony, same here. Grew up spending summers on my grandparent's farm and smelling, as Grandpa used to say "The sweet smell of manure". And the tobbacco from his long pipe.
The aroma of the onions and celery being sauted at 6:00AM Thanksgiving morning for the stuffing.
My Dad's Old Spice aftershave.
Thanks for this entry Joli!
I love the smell of rain blowing in...being carried by a breeze just before the actual rainstorm arrives...
and the smell of cheeba.
Announcement
July 3, 2008
Member Agencies:
The Governor has signed HB1287 into law – it is now Act 511. We have succeeded in getting the Louisiana Food Bank Association an allocation of $5 million!
This year had its uncertainties, as we had a new Governor with priorities of his own, and many new legislators as a result of term limits. The Governor set a strict standard for NGOs (non-governmental organization) to qualify for state funding and we were one of the few entities that could meet that level of accountability. We succeeded by giving multiple presentations to the Finance and Appropriations Committees, and the Agriculture Committees of both the House and the Senate. We met with the Governor, Chief of Staff, Commissioner of Administration, Commissioner of Agriculture, several interest groups like the AFLCIO and Black Caucus and many other legislators and members of the Governor’s staff.
We would like to thank you all for your tremendous support in raising the legislature’s awareness of hunger across the state of Louisiana. We are extremely grateful to have you as our allies in the fight to end hunger.
Within the next several weeks, we will host the Louisiana Food Bank Association check presentation event and ask for member agency participation in recognizing our success. Media will be present and invitees include: Governor Bobby Jindal, Lt. Governor Mitch Landrieu, Senator Edwin Murrary, Senator Karen Carter Peterson, Representative Juan LaFonta, and others.
The event will be held at our New Orleans warehouse location. You will receive more information in the upcoming weeks.
Thank you for continuing to feed hope through your support of Second Harvest Food Bank.
Sincerely,
Agency Relations Department
COMMENTS
Good news.
Happy Hobos. :D
Oh joy, more work for me...
;)
Seriously, this is another piece of wonderful news.
That is GREAT news!! :)
Awesome! I am so happy to see some politicians do the right thing.
Congratulations I know it takes massive amounts of paperwork and going over it with a fine tooth comb to qualify. It's great that someone ( in government) is finally stepping up and helping.
Wow..just keeps getting better and better.:D
From my darling one, my sweetest friend, Irony. I am so lucky and blessed to even be in this incredible woman's presence. That she thinks of me with this kind of favor is a grace in my life.
Hjärtat
00:55:39 - Jul 06 2008
In the time before our souls were formed,
A gentle artist looked upon his clay.
Its coldness by those loving hands was warmed,
And then together, on his bench we lay.
You were there before the moment of my birth.
You were my laughter as I danced before the wind.
You were the rain, the sun, the coolness of the earth,
My courage to admit when I had sinned.
Your gift you share with me, that makes me whole,
The poets heart that beats iambic time,
Reveals to me with every beat your soul,
And on lifes page I watch your words sublime.
Every word and action has been stored.
Each moment captured in a thread so fine.
The love spun into strands, then silken cord,
Unbreakable, that links your heart to mine
When time takes up its jasmine scented brush
And draws the lines of silver through my hair,
Softly supplanting summers scarlet blush
Til only snow remains, you will be there.
I am just back from one of the most amazing meetings I have ever been a part of. This is likely to lead to great things for our little Center. I am humbled and blown away. I will write more about this as the event unfolds, but for now, an international food distribution organization has chosen us to be the recipient of trucks and trucks of food, each truckload worth approximately $35,000. We are one of only 2 selected.
On the anniversary of Katrina, there will be one event scheduled in our honor that will be hosted by two VERY high profile athletes. As a hint, one wears a size 22 shoe!
After that event, we can schedule our own event through them where we do a distribution for 400 families with another sports figure committed to being at the event!
Do I have an amazing job or what? I get PAID to do this!!! If you tried to bottle my gratitude and enthusiasm right now, you'd better have God's supply of glass to do it!
COMMENTS
Just one incredible thing after the other for you :) I am delighted for your Centre!
Sweet!!
You guys are doing incredible thing. Congratulations!
I have a business proposition for you too ;)
What amazingly good news! The people that are served by the center are lucky, indeed, to have somone so dedicated to doing good things. You make me feel ashamed that I don't do more, different side of that token...You make me WANT to do more.
Great news!! Happy for you, and all that this will help.
I am so happy for you and the center! You are my hero.
I can't stop smiling:)
Claps and laughs~ You're only getting started sweetie.Thats what happens when you do the things you do Joli.Im really happy to see this entry.
Congrats x
That's gonna be a lot of happy hobos :D Congratulations to you and more so to all of the people who will directly benefit from it :)
That's great news!
Yes, you get paid to do this, but you do it better than most! ;)
p.s. doesn't the buzz coming out of a successful business meeting feel good? :)
I had best get to work then...
..the fact that you can regale us with such enthusiasm is in part why I return to read of the positive work being achieved.
..they're lucky, I think, to share a portion of that enthusiasm.
Sharing excerpts of an amazing letter I received a few days ago in my email:
"Thank you, thank you, thank you from the bottom of our hearts to all of you! You created a mass movement across our entire country to get the House leadership to understand how critically needed rent vouchers are by the most disabled and most vulnerable victims of Hurricanes Katrina and Rita. And it worked! Last night we received word that the House leadership granted your request and placed the $73 million in funding for the vouchers in the Supplemental Appropriations Bill.
"You are all heroes!" (She lists here a ton of individual names) "...; the faith-based community who made the moral case; and caring people all across the country who flooded the leadership and the White House with calls making it clear that the American people believe that the most disabled and vulnerable victims of these disasters need and deserve ongoing housing assistance – and to every single one of you for working your hearts out for this righteous cause.
These vouchers save lives – make no mistake."
COMMENTS
-
Xzavier
22:42 Jul 25 2008
MBK beat her to it first on his lol
Makes me cry a lil each time I see it.
DarkCthulhu
23:00 Jul 25 2008
That is something like what I read somewhere. Check this out
Joli
23:10 Jul 25 2008
You suck, DC!
Irony
00:00 Jul 26 2008
That video link is broken at the moment, but I googled it for the youtube and you are right, it is wonderful!
Vampirewitch39
00:19 Jul 26 2008
O.O Me sorry.... raccoon eyes.
*runs*
Bones
01:22 Jul 26 2008
Wow, that's amazing!
STABB666
01:57 Jul 26 2008
It is very heartwarming...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=__UHSZHJ9LA
Silverbow
03:14 Jul 26 2008
Oh my gosh.. that is so sweet.. Look at the way he nuzzled them and wants so much of their attention.. and the lioness... : goes and curls up with my kittens.:
SouthernFreak
03:23 Jul 26 2008
That is so adorable. My 60lb boxer, who never pays the comp any attention had to put his feet in my lap, intensely watch, nose was almost plastered to the screen, tilting his head sideways at times. As soon as it ended he jumped down & went to playing. I think even he enjoyed it. lol
Nightgame
04:12 Jul 26 2008
VW always finds the best ones :)
placidchaos
05:13 Jul 26 2008
That was awesome. He may not have been tamed but he was befriended.
Beastt17
09:29 Jul 26 2008
A little reminder that, with few exceptions, we are the savages. Rarely do men and woman love like a lion, remember like an elephant or snuggle like a pup. More often we grin at ourselves as we exercise our barbarity, our dominion and our brutality in quenching our appetite.
There is, however, a lighter side. As I watched and pondered their chosen name, I couldn't help but ponder the old cliche'; "you are what you eat". ;)