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HAD TO GO OUT LAST NHIGHT FOR FEW EXTRA SUPPLIES. SAW A HOMELSS MAN SITTIGN OUTS IDE THE STORE CRYING. WHEN GRABBED MY GROCIERS AND A FEW EXTRA THINGS FOR THE OPPE HOMELESS MAN. GAVE HIM A CARTON OF CHOCOLATE MILK A CANDY BAR ABD SOME SANDWICHES AND STOPPED TO SAY HEY. HIS REACTION HE AND HIS MOM BOTH GOT UP CRYING AND HUGGED ME TIGHT. THE MOM SAID THRU HER TEARS, YOU ARE THE FIRST PESON TO SHOW KINDNES TO US IN A FEW DAYS. I TOLD HER I HAVE MANY BLESSIGNA, BTU FOR THE TGACE OF GODDESS GO I AND I JUST WANTED TO HELP. TO SEE HOW THANKFUL AND GRATFUL THEY WERE OFR A SIMPLE BIT OF FOOD MONEY AND A DRINK REALLY HUMBLED ME THEY DONT KNOW ME, BTU THEY GAVE ME A HUG ND SAID THANKL YOU. MY ARTNER HAS GONE BACK FOUND THEM AND WE HAVE INVITED THEM TO OUR NEW YEARS PARTY, WE WILL RTY TO DO WHAT WE CAN TO HELP. I MYSELF WHENI WAS BNOTH A CHILD AND A SINGLE MOM I WAS HOMELESS OFR A TIME SO I REALLY UNDERSTAND WHAT IT FEELS LIKE TO BE FRIENDLESS AND ALONE. TO GO AWAY KNOWINGI HAVE MADEA SMALL DIFFERENCE TO SOMEONE HAS REALLY REMINDED ME OF ALL I HAVE TO BE THANKFUL FOR. WECAN ALL MAKE A SMALL POSITICVE DIFFERENCE TO EACH OTHER AND TO ANIMALS IF ONLY WE WERE WILLING TO RTY,. EVEN IF ALL YOU CAN GIVE IS A BIT OF FOOD AND A KIND WORD.
I AM GRATEFUL FOR
MY BIO FAMILY
MY KIDS
THAT MY SEANBOY REACHED 18 YRS YOUNG SAFELY. THE NIGHT HE WAS BORN I WSA TOLDS HE WOULD DIE BEORE MORNING AND HE DIDNT,HE IS SCHOOL CAPTAIN OF HIS SCHOOL WORKING PART TIME STUDYIG AND DOING GOOD.
MY PETS
MY FRIENDS HERE AT VR AND WHO ARE NOT ON VR
MY HOME
MY DAILY NEEDS LIKE FOOD ALWAYS BEIGN TAKEN CARE OFF
MY PARTNER
MY VET SARAH
A DR MEDICATION AND A HOSPITAL WHEN NEEDED
THE3 FACTI HAVE MY FREEDOM TO JUST BE ME TO SHARE MY OPINION WHEN MANY OTHER DO ONT HAVE FREEDOM OF ANY KIND
MONEY TO MEET MY NEEDS
THESE AER JUST SOME OF THE MANY REASONS I AM GRATEFUL FOR.
ALSO REMEBER THAT LIFE IS SO PRECIOUS, AND IT CAN BE TAKEN FROM ANY ONE OF US IN A HEART BEAT. REMEBER TO TELL THOSE YOU LOVER THAT YOU LOVE THEM BEFORE YOU HEAD OUT, SO THAT WAY THE LAST MEMORY YOU BOTH HVE OF EACH OTHER IS THAT YOU LOVE EACH OTHER.
WISHNG EVERYONE HERE AT VR A VERY HAPPY AND SAFE NEW YEAR, MAY THE COMING 2019 BE ALL YOU WISH IT TO BE AND MORE. REMEMBER TO TAKE CARE FOR NOT ONLY YOURSELVES BUT THOSE YOU LOVE. ESPECIALLY BE MINDFUL WHEN TRAVELING AND ALLOW EXTRA TIME TO GET TO WHERE YOU ARE GOING.DO NOT FORGET YOUR PETS EITHRE, GIVEN THERE WILL BE LOADS OF NOISE FIREWORKS ETC, PLEASE KEEP YOUR PETS INSIDE TO KEEP THEM SAFE. I HOPE EVERYONE HAS A HAPPIER HEALTHIER AND MORE PRODUCTIVE 2019!
WISHING EVERYONE HERE AT VR A VERY HAPPY SAFE AND SPECIAL CHRISTMAS AND A WONDERFUL SAFE HAPPY AND POSITIVE 2019 TO COME. PLEASE REMEMBER TO TAKE SPECIAL CARE AND EXTRA TIME WHEN TRAVELING. ITS BETTER TO ARRIVE LATTE ADN ALIVE THEN INJURED OR DEAD. AY EVERYONE OF YOU HAVE THE HAP[P[IEST CHRISTMAS POSSIBLE AND MAY YOUR COMING 2019 BE ALL YOU WISH IT TO BE. CHEERS HANNAHROSE.
HOW TO SPEAK MELBURNIAN TAKEN FROM THE HERALD SUN NEWSPAPER
07:48 Dec 07 2018 Times Read: 1,153
To help the naive traveller traverse the many dialects and linguistic pitfalls of our great city, here is a list of common phrases as they are spoken in different parts of Melbourne.
TOORAK
Hello
Do you work here?
How are you?
Do you know who works here?
What are your hobbies?
Could you help me anyway?
How old are you?
Who’s your surgeon?
Would you like to come for dinner?
Our chef is ill. Will you do it for, what, $50?
DANDENONG
Hello
Hello, officer.
How are you?
What have I done now?
What are your hobbies?
Do you drift?
How old are you?
Need a fake ID?
Would you like to come for dinner?
I would like you to come to a second location so my accomplice can burgle you.
Fitzroy
FITZROY
Hello
Hey.
How are you?
What is your pronoun?
What are your hobbies?
Have I seen you at the craft market?
How old are you?
Listen to Triple J?
Would you like to come for dinner?
Can I come for dinner?
DOCKLANDS
Hello
Hi.
How are you?
Are you lost?
What are your hobbies?
Where are you supposed to be?
How old are you?
How long have you been lost?
Would you like to come for dinner?
The restaurants are a half a kilometre that way.
CARLTON
Hello
Ciao
How are you?
Free glass of wine for the lady if you join us for lunch.
What are your hobbies?
You like pasta? Best pasta here.
How old are you?
Heading to Cinema Nova after this?
Would you like to come for dinner?
Free glass of wine for the lady if you join us for dinner.
Craigieburn.
CRAIGIEBURN
Hello
Is someone there?
How are you?
What are you doing in my house?
What are your hobbies?
Is that a golf club?
How old are you?
I hope you get tried as an adult.
Would you like to come for dinner?
Please stay for five more minutes until the cops get here.
CHADSTONE
Hello
Hi there.
How are you?
It’s 20% off autumn stock today.
What are your hobbies?
Are you on our mailing list?
How old are you?
Do you own any Oroton?
Would you like to come for dinner?
We’re open until 9pm Thursdays.
FRANKSTON
Hello
Hey.
How are you?
What are youse looking at?
What are your hobbies?
Who do you barrack for?
How old are you?
When did ya get that tatt?
Would you like to come for dinner?
Wanna go to Red Rooster?
Brighton
BRIGHTON
Hello
Hello, darling.
How are you?
You look great!
What are your hobbies?
Are you still on with the tennis coach?
How old are you?
You don’t look a day over 50. You’re 45? Oh, right.
Would you like to come for dinner?
We would invite you to dinner, but we’re so busy.
BRUNSWICK
Hello
Hey, brother.
How are you?
You high?
What are your hobbies?
Do you get high?
How old are you?
Remember Space Invaders?
Would you like to come for dinner?
Vegan fondue tonight at ours, crash afterwards.
Collingwood.
COLLINGWOOD
Hello
Will you accept a reverse charges call?
How are you?
Hey I’m in a bit of trouble.
What are your hobbies?
You know that Guitar Hero set we play on?
How old are you?
And that TV I gave you for your birthday?
Would you like to come for dinner?
They were stolen. Can you come and bail me out?
ST KILDA
Hello
Hey dude.
How are you?
Ever noticed how cats seem to stare these days? Really intrusive. Like doors.
What are your hobbies?
Blue. Everything is blue.
How old are you?
Stokehouse looks different, man. Boxy. You got any Charlie?
YOU KNOW CHRISTMAS IS COMING TO MELBOURNE AUSTRALIA
12:12 Dec 05 2018 Times Read: 1,169
TAKEN FROM ONE OF THE MANY DIGITAL NEWSPAPERS I SUBSCRIBE TO. THIS COMES FROM THE HERALD SUN
You know Christmas is coming in Melbourne when …
1. One local council or another is in trouble for spending too much on Christmas decorations, or not spending enough.
2. Anyone likely to get free tickets to the tennis sees a sudden increase in close friends.
3. The full extent of the city’s tattoo obsession becomes clear as the weather gets warmer and the garments get lighter.
4. News stories about the AFL are mostly limited to off-season scandals.
5. Excuses for train delays gradually go from “too wet” to “too hot”.
6. Shopping centre carparks become frontiers of aggression and indecency.
Shopping centre car parks turn into war zones each December.
7. Smooth 91.5 comes into its own.
8. People start saying, “are you getting any time off?”
9. A trip to Chadstone requires a packed lunch.
10. You get to know the staff at Dan Murphy’s by name.
11. Half the Amazon seems to have been felled for the retail junk mail showing up in your letterbox.
Never is a “No Junk Mail” sign more necessary than the weeks before Christmas.
12. Australia Post once again becomes your best friend and your worst enemy.
13. The debate about the merit of Mariah Carey is on again.
14. The Christmas decorations over the IGA deli, which have been there for seven years, are yet again temporarily justified.
15. Colleagues start swapping ham glazing tips and reliable chutney brands.
16. The sale of Bunnings vouchers outpaces the sale of Bunnings sausages.
17. Everybody’s waiting to hear back from the in-laws about what the go is for Christmas Day.
18. Snowman motifs clash with increasing bushfire danger.
19. Parents realise LEGO has a higher price per kilo than avocados.
Lego or avocado: Now you know which one is the real bargain.
20. The beach diet is locked in mortal combat with the Christmas party canape diet.
21. Boxes of Cadbury Favourites are traded like cigarettes in prison.
22. Children who visit two shopping centres in one day are challenged by the idea that Santa can exist in two places at once.
23. Your local cafe has stopped offering soup and has started offering cold press.
24. Receipts are kept.
25. The high street has a resident nine-year-old busker playing carols on a school-issued violin.
26. Flights to Noosa and Byron are chockers.
27. Every school is advertising a Christmas concert on a board donated by a local real estate agent.
28. Telfast and mince pies are consumed in equal measure.
29. The Esky, used as a storage container, prepares to resume its primary function.
30. A decision in January to shove tangled Christmas lights into a garbage for hasty storage returns to bite.
31. Energy authorities are getting ready to pour extra supply into Christmas lights at Ivanhoe.
A new power station is needed to keep Melbourne’s suburban lights displays.
32. You welcome the mixed scent of sunscreen, Aeroguard and cinnamon.
33. Cherries are in season.
34. You realise 15c bags at the supermarket will cost you hundreds over the next month.
35. Tap and Go isn’t a credit card service, it’s a life philosophy.
36. The mess and hassle of having a live Christmas tree in an apartment is forgotten and a fresh one is sought.
37. The risk of tinsel-related static electric shock at Myer is high.
38. The days gradually get longer as your attention span at work gets shorter.
39. Ads for supermarkets show large extended families at happy gatherings that are unrealistically civil.
40. The distance between the shop you want to go to and an available parking space increases dramatically.
TAKEN FROM ONE OF THE MANY DIGITAL NEWSPAPERS I SUBSCRIBE TO CALLED
THE HERALD SUN.
Mitchell Toy: How to answer children’s questions about Santa
Mitchell Toy, Herald Sun
December 4, 2018 7:00am
Subscriber only
Advent is when car spaces are fought over like the last life vest on the Titanic, and discerning children pick apart the Santa story with sharp questions.
Good thing we have you covered with these 20 easy answers to 20 common niggling queries your child might have about Santa’s existence and habits.
THE REAL REASONS YOU KNOW IT’S CHRISTMAS
HOW POST-WAR MELBOURNE CELEBRATED CHRISTMAS
ELF ON THE SHELF ISN’T CUTE, IT’S CREEPY
How will Santa get in when our apartment has no chimney?
Santa, present at this year’s quorate body corporate Annual General Meeting, indicated he will use the ducted heating in the absence of a chimney.
The reindeer will be told to wait on the car stacker. The matter was unanimously passed.
How do elves make iPads?
Apple products are routinely designed in California and assembled elsewhere.
The tariff war currently prohibits the entry of North Pole iPads, which is why yours was sourced from China, but was still wrapped by elves.
How do presents for millions of children fit in such a small sack?
Vacuum sealing.
How can Santa be in Myer and David Jones at the same time?
Just as Santa can deliver presents to millions of homes at once, so too can he exist in two styrofoam thrones at once.
His magic is even powerful enough to circumvent contracts which prohibit working for direct competitors.
Santa’s magic is so strong it allows him to be in two department stores at once, with completely altered facial features.
Why wasn’t daddy here while Santa visited?
One year, Santa took a loan from daddy to pay for your Razor scooter.
Santa has missed several repayments on that loan and prefers to visit when daddy is absent.
If it’s summer in Australia, why does Santa still wear a coat when he visits?
Since Santa’s trip to Melbourne is on the same leg as his trip to Antarctica, removing the coat isn’t an efficient use of time.
How come Santa is supposed to only visit nice children, but the bully at school got a bike?
The bully’s parents tricked that poor child into believing Santa had visited by purchasing the bike themselves and hiding it in the garage until Christmas.
Your bike was delivered in no such way.
How did my letter to Santa reach the North Pole when it’s inaccessible by Australia Post bicycles?
While most of Victoria, let alone the Arctic Circle, often seems inaccessible to Australia Post bicycles, letters are collected from local depots during the year by flying reindeer who have little else to do.
Letters to the Arctic Circle, inaccessible by Australia Post bikes, are carried by flying reindeer.
Does Santa have kids?
Santa is metaphorically a type of father to all children who believe in him, and literally a father to more of them than he may care to publicly admit.
Why does Santa never visit poor children?
Zoning issues.
Why do the reindeer eat carrots?
Carrots improve eyesight at night time and those deer have to dodge Jetstar flights like complete pros.
How is Santa always watching me?
Santa sits at the heart of a data-gathering machine that rivals the NSA and the Chinese Government.
Intel from undercover sources is delivered via encrypted messaging apps.
Santa’s flying sleigh was delivered by SpaceX after persistent badgering from Elon Musk.
Who designed Santa’s flying sleigh?
Elon Musk, even though he wasn’t asked to help.
Why is Santa so fat?
Santa is contractually obliged to consume the milk and cookies left for him by every child in the world.
He is, all things considered, remarkably slim.
How come Santa’s wrapping paper matches the wrapping paper on presents we give to extended family members?
Magic.
How do I know when I’m on the naughty list?
All parents are sent daily updates on the naughty and nice lists in the form of a read-only PDF via email.
Parents know when you’re on the naughty list and can advise which changes in behaviour or chores need to be undertaken to improve the listing.
Having lived since the beginning of time, Santa worked in hospitality before the birth of Christ.
If Santa has lived forever, was he alive before Jesus, for whom Christmas is celebrated?
Santa was around before Jesus, but was working in hospitality part time while studying.
If Santa brings presents for free, why are toys always on sale before Christmas?
Santa’s anti-competitive behaviour is being investigated by government watchdogs around the western world but, pending a resolution, retailers have no choice but to put toys on sale to compete with the North Pole machine.
Do the elves get paid?
Elves are volunteers or are serving non-custodial sentences.
Does Santa visit atheist families?
Atheist parents often buy presents for their children and leave them under the tree because they believe Santa will not visit.
Santa does visit, and replaces all the presents with exact replicas.
PLEASE AS YOU START HEADING INTO THE ANNUAL TIME OF CHRISTMAS AND GIFTS, FAMILY TIME ETC, PLEASE GIVE A THOUGHT FOR ALL THE LONELY SAD AND BROKEN PEOPLE, WHO ARE HOMELESS SAD MISERABLE AND LONELY. STOP AND SAY A QUICK HELLO BUY THEM A MEAL AND REMEMBER BUT FOR GODDESSES GRACE, GO YOU AND I. WE ARE SO LUCKY TO HAVE A LOVING SAFE WARM HOME AND LOVING FAMILY TO SHARE YOUR HOLIDAYS WITH. MANY HAVE NOT A SOUL TO SHARE THE DAY WITH, DUE TO THIR PROBLEMS ETC. JUST A SMILE A KIND WORD AND A SNACK, CAN ENRICH AND CHEER THOSE LESS FORTUNATE THEN YOU, UP SO MUCH. ONE OF THE THINGS OUR FAMILY LOVE TO DO IS. THE KIDS ARE VERY COMPETIVE AT THIS! IS TO DO A RANDOM ACT OF KINDNESS FOR A FRIEND FAMILY MEMBER OR STRANGER ,OR AN ANIMAL WITHOUT EXPECTING NOTHING BACK. IT IS WONDERFUL TO SEE A SAD PERSON CHEERED UP BY SOMETHING AS SIMPLE AS A CUP CAKE AND A FEW DOLLARS OR A WARM MEAL OR A CHEERY HOW ARE YOU? WE ARE ON THIS PLANET FOR SUCH A SMALL TIME, AND WE CAN ALL MAKE A POSITIVE DIFFERENCE TO A PERSON OR AN ANIMAL. YOU DONT NEED MONEY TO MAKE A DIFFERNCE,. JUST A KIND LOVNG HEART AND SOME COMPASSION IS ALL THATS NEEDED AND A FEW MOMENTS OF YOUR TIME.
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