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Wanted to know there was someone there for you and would love you unconditionally?

wanted to feel that person embrace you and held you when you cried?

wanted to be important to someone?

wanted to know what its like to be wanted somewhere instead of trying to work your way into a group or a conversation?

wanted to be happy

wanted to understand what people thought of you?

wanted to visit the cold release of death and never worry about this existential shit again?



That's where I am, right at the bottom.

It doesn't seem to matter what i do, there's nothing going on for me. I try to make friends, i try to(and wait patiently) for a significant other. No avail



I feel like the least significant part of everyone's life.



It wouldn't matter if i dropped off the face of the earth...



I don't know why I come here. no one gives a shit.

I don't know why I get up in the morning, no one cares. I don't know why I try.. no one cares.



I don't even care anymore.

COMMENTS

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AngellicaRose
05:13 Sep 23 2016

I think most everyone has experienced some if not all of these feelings. You do matter hun. Don't ever think that you don't. Come talk to me if you wish.

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POST COMMENT

I've killed myself more times than I care to remember.. Not in a literal sense but in a purely figurative one. I remember how many different versions of myself that have existed over the years and how I have systematically killed them when there's nothing left of what they were and eventually overshadowing who I am. I have had enough of trying to hide behind this putrid veil of "protection", and desperately wanting to walk out from behind the curtain, as it were, but I wonder to myself, "would I be accepted? would anyone really care?" I doubt any of these questions actually matter. I also wonder to myself if there is anyone out there for me? I've been patient, I've loved and lost, and I've been alone for a good portion of time. I think it's time for me to get back out there, and see who might be waiting.



Happy Haunting ~