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Here lies my favorite combat boots.

They lived a long life, protecting me.

Saving me from over-anxious guys,

by one shot to the crotch.

They will be sorely missed,

and the memories of guys in pain

will live on in our minds

and in their scuffed leather.

I feel, but I don’t

I see, but I'm blind

I hear, but I'm deaf

I'm loosing my mind

Memories are swarming me,

Cutting off my air. They smother me

With their unrelenting repetition,

Playing over and over

Like the coda of a broken record.

Drowning me in a pool of blood and tears

Where the grass ceases to reach farther

Where the trees are afraid to grow

Where the sky never lights by day

You will find your dead soul.



Hell is where and what you are

Hell is why you’ll never scar,

Hell is where you’ve sentenced me

Hell is the landscape of your bloody valley.

Innocent. He was innocent.

“Never forget me”

Tears cloud my vision

He is all I see as I am thrown into the abyss

My biggest lie, my biggest fault, my Achilles’ heel

He broke through the dark to find me

With simple words he helped me escape

Then pushed me into a new darkness

The realization of what I am

I am evil. I am doomed

I am lost and will never be found

I am a creature for whom love is dead

I am a vampire.

I’ll save you from this hell,

Hold my hand, you will see

Though things have not been well,

You can put your trust in me.







My love can open your eyes to the night

There is beauty in darkness, free your heart.

The kiss of my lips can make everything right,

Just let me be with you, I will never part.



I will watch over thee, if you want me,

And when you want me gone,

I will disappear into eternity,

But even then I won’t be gone long.



So have faith in my power,

I can save you from this hell.

Though I left you for the hour,

You will recover from this spell.

As I sit in the darkness I wonder where you are, where you’ve been.

I feel you near me, a ghost, mist of shadow, snow in the night

You whisper softly in my ears as I sleep, secrets of love and life.

You brought change, my view distorts, the stars melt, darkness enfolds.

The clock ticks back and forth on the same time, the second frozen

You breathe life into me. My heart quickens, but too fast, I panic.

But you are already gone from me. I turn to the mirror

What I see there shocks me, I stand in fear

The eyes that stare back are no longer dead.

The smile no longer sinister.

It is new, and makes me only realize more what a monster I was.

How evil I had become in the absence of emotion.

There is hell in knowledge. Angels do not live in the dark.

What once stared back in silver repose was a demon, red eyed and full of malice.

It drew innocence into it and crushed the beauty of ignorance.

Now humanity has caught the fiend and smothered it with kindness

It no longer hungers for blood, but for love.

Yet in the dark recesses of the night, it waits to become itself once more.

It knows the chance will come soon

In your absence the time grows nigh.

The demon is waking; it stretches big, fangs out and ready.

The good inside is dying like a flower in the first frost.

Words like ice pour from its mouth, harming what once loved it.

It wants to be alone, to preserve its wickedness.

But you wont let it. You found the good still inside.

Nurtured it through love and care.

It can no longer hold ground. It is gone for good.

Innocence is born and grows. You address my conscience,

“ I will never abandon you again. I will never lie again. I love you again

To push the limits of another’s brain

Show them the truth and pull it away

To tug at their strings to an endless tune

Until the painted wood begins to decay



The bare truth, a skeleton is all that remains.

They have been stripped, shown the fault of their passion.

They try to hide from it, but it is obvious

What they thought to become was impossible, an illusion.





A puppet cannot become the master

Though it imitates life, it has none

All it can do is be dressed in false character

A mockery to have ever been thought of as someone.

Alone in my cell, I am but a dark shadow.

My voice does not exist. I am dead.

When you come, my visage turns light.

My soul sings out where it was once mute.

Am I alive, truly alive again?

It was a dream. You’re gone.

I am left cold and forlorn.

How will I survive the dark now?

It closes in on me from all sides.

My panicked breathing is all I hear

My vision cuts off.

In a day as black as pitch

Roses can’t survive

I walk amongst you, a predator prisoner to its prey,

But I pity your lot.

You go blindly from obsession to obsession

Unaware that your time grows short.



I catch you in the night, alone, lonely.

Your life rushes out in a red torrent.

Memories long forgotten flash in your mind

I pull back and laugh as you feel the end draw near.



The light slowly leaves your eyes.

I watch as it dims, forever entranced by what I’ll never have

Doomed to wander forever unknown, undead

I grow weary of it. Now you are dead too.



So I walk off into the rain,

Just another victim in a world of the guilty

What have I done by changing you?

Have you lost all hope?

I’ve crushed your faith

Annihilated your will

With the feel of my teeth

I killed what I loved.

You are as cold as me.

Instead of my lover’s eyes

I see stone. Another revenant

A heart as dead and black as mine

What I sought to preserve

I destroyed. Made like me

And now I can’t leave you.

I chained myself to a lifeless being

You remind me forever of what I am.

I am hate. I am anger. I am lost.

How can I teach what I don’t understand?

You play with me like I did you.

Now I am the puppet and you are the master.

You keep me close to watch me suffer.

I see in your eyes knowledge of my treason.

And you use it against me.

I still love my creation, my muse, my nature.

I still love you, the holder of my strings.

But I will never admit to the lie,

My vehement denial, my assertions of hate,

Though you know the truth.

I see coldness all around me, all the time.

It resides in the secret garden, killing all the roses.

The red freezes, turns black with frost and grime.

Preserving the beautiful in anguished, weary poses

Still attached to the wall they no longer climb

The perfect shroud for the remnants of my soul.



The black roses fall one by one to the ground,

Covering my body as I lay lost there.

In the darkness the wind spreads them around

And they circle me; get tangled in my hair.

The whisper of their leaves is the only sound

The perfect shroud for the remnants of my soul.



All is dead near me, yet I am peaceful.

The silence embraces me like a lover.

I remember when the garden was beautiful,

How I whispered to it, and nurtured it like a mother.

Now it is dead and it suits me all too well,

The perfect shroud for the remnants of my soul.



As I lay in quiet revelry, waiting for the spring to bring life

The resonance of footfalls breaks the garden’s sublime silence

I rise up from the ground, at once ready for any strife,

The dead roses falling from me as I see my fate. I wince.

The trespasser holds me close; I feel teeth as sharp as a knife.

I lay dying, wrapped in their arms in the appropriate place,

My secret garden, a necropolis, the trees, grave markers, tears of my killer, epitaph

My lifeless body covered in dead, black roses that lay as if they were lace

Now and forever more, the perfect shroud for the remnants of my dead, black soul.