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the internal ever repeating question..

how this obscure reality proves to never change,

when yours is reborn so very often.

The rebirth of Darkness,

set my own journey ahead.

A journey to find my purest form.

created one so different.

From the one you so very long ago once knew,

once loved.

Looking into the eyes one the one I love,

and bitter loathing returned.

The realization of the irreversability,

of those actions I proceded with.

Knowledge is Agony, is it not?

However, ignorance is far from bliss,

only actions based on knowledge,

is delectable.

Trying to start Anew.

Brought me to a life without me or you.

How much I needed that solitude,

that darkness,

that rebirth.

And that concept makes me question my own.

If life is a game, then who are the players?

If one singular pawn is lost;

the game is over,

no matter how strong the king,

or the player will ever be.

How emotions change the game of chess.

Cut the ties.

We arent mundanes for a reason.

To be a third person in your own battle,

is a statement that Ill never full understand,

but is exclusively my battle.

But the world fails to change for you.

and how yours changes excessively,

even in a wrong way,

even without conscious malicious intent.

Even if you know this occurs,

youll never fully know what was you,

and what was your own crude,

unconscious curiousity and animalistic intent.

But trusting yourself with those qualities,

isnt a bad thing.

But it is that you assume

that others will trust you,

no matter how much of that animalistic intent you show.

They didnt seek friendship and learn to trust,

a part of you that the creater hasnt full knowledge of.

And as horrible as that sounds.

This depressing world wont change for you.

But how drastically yours is twisted in return.

Enveloped

in darkness.

Reborn

to be baptized

in cruel flames.

People who linger in the shadows,

know when to keep their tongues,

unlike you ignorant day dwellers.

How wrong is it to be a creature of night,

and have a fear of the dark?

And even worse,

loathe the day even more than fear?

Nothing can compare.

Darkness,

the pain of it,

brings the longing I so desire,

like trapped in barbed wire,

and finding it as gentle as a caress.

Who could resist,

such Pleasure.

Losing the Ability to measure,

or differentiate pain,

or pleasure,

and lose yourself all together,

in its eternal bliss,

Shielded from those bright glaring eyes.

Assuming the worst,

and hoping for the best.

It beckons to me like smothering crimson,

or depression shown on another's cheek.

Wipe those tears away.

Silence them,

so you can embrace its beckoning call,

like barbed wire,

but finding its embrace softer than a caress.

Putting your sanity to the test,

you take from others.

Until you find yourself smothered,

in their emotions.

How delicious.