The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

So I havent written in such a long time. But I did that stupidly girly thing of falling in love, wich is so not like me. I thought I was happy and changed so much for him, but alas it wasn't worth it. I lost myself in the belief that someone wanted me. At first it was fun, he was sweet and funny and so comfortable to be around. I've loved but never been in love before so it was all so new and exciting. But at the same time scarry I've never needed or craved anyone like that before it was at times painful. But that was nothing compared to the pain I felt when I was betrayed by my best friend and her desperate attempt to steal him from me. I say steal but how can she steal something that was never really mine. I knew something was up, they were acting different but I confronted them and for a month I was blinded by my love for them both. Funny part of it was we all lost in the end. He had her found he didnt want her and thought i'd never notice. I am comforted by the fact that he chose me in the end but I was so angry with the lies I haven't spoken to him since. Her on the other hand when she found he didnt want her, decided to take me from him. In the end I knew what was happening and decided i didnt need people like that around so she lost us both. I was a mess it hurt so much to loose them both my love and my best and oldest friend almost sister. The depression became too much for my other friends some stopped talking to me others I found wernt the right people to lean on because they just threw me to the ground. But after it all I found the real people who care about me the ones who stick with me through my worst so I owe it to them to show them my best. I still think of him or her at times and its like being choked but its happening less and less. and I will never forget the lessons I've leant by having them in my life. And I know that someone some day will earn my love by loving me.