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So I have been burned and tortured by the chemical gods of this world. I have sought among the ruins of ancient and modern occult writings for the dark gods to try to twist the hand that fate had dealt me. I cursed Fate and wished for a chance to confront her and pulverize her with my hammer. But now I am simply back to talking with my God. I have many things which I thank him for every day. I try to remember the blessings which have been given to me. I am getting to spend time I never had with my father. I have two daughters, and one of them still talks to me. I have found friends that I can talk to honestly and openly. I am very thankful for them. I have been given a chance which few ever receive. I have found the one true love of my life. She brings me so much joy and happiness that it is beyond any words for me to describe. I thank God for her every day. And on top of that she has a little boy who reminds me in so many ways of my youngest daughter. He is a precious child. Truly a gift from God. I have strayed from the path that I should have walked. Finally the path has emerged into the light, and I can see the blessings I have. What more could be asked to give thanks for.

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MistressAngelique
17:59 Nov 30 2016

I am glad things are looking up for you:)

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markus666
11:28 Dec 06 2016

Being Happy is what matters. Living life to the fullness and letting all negativity away from you, is the key to a happy life. Good for you and your family. Blessed be!!

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Some would say I have no soul, and my black black heart is a hard thing to find. I have lived a life where for decades I longed only to die and start over. Now for the first time in my life I have had my past mistakes laid to rest, and God has given me happiness. I thank God for all he has given me each and every day. Love, friends, family, a new life...And yet my soul trembles with fear over that which I can not control. Driving through a darkness where I belong, but those I love do not. My mind reels and my chest is torn asunder. The devil inside me waiting and watching. Wondering...

Sitting with my father eating pork roast and sauerkraut, I cooked enough to feed at least 6 normal people. Anyway my father had his plate scooted away from me, as if I were going to steal some of his sauerkraut. When the phone rings, there is only one person I would answer the phone in the middle of dinner to talk with, and she tells me how beautiful the moon looks tonight. Risking my plate of sauerkraut, I take the garbage as if it needed taking right that moment, and head out to the garage in a pair of shorts. Feeling the autumn air finally reaching normal temperatures I grabbed a flannel shirt before sneaking out the back door. It was pitch dark and no moon was visible, so I walked out into the darkness trying to see through the heavy overgrowth of trees, out onto the golf course behind his house. My heart beating faster and an old song from a movie my children used to watch about a lost mouse child? I am not sure but the haunting melody of "Somewhere out there" and the longing for her, along with the wonderful chill in the air, I can barely stand to be apart from her. The moon is amazingly beautiful. It will be another six days before I see her again. I think I am moonstruck. I think I lost half of my sauerkraut, but it was worth the view.

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NocturnumIgnem
14:40 Nov 06 2016

Pops was hungry! LMAO

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H3rEvilDaddy
15:00 Nov 06 2016

The sauerkraut didn't take long to drive him into the bathroom. Call it Karma or whatever. Is all good.

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There is no Malice in True Love why should I waste time apologizing for loving a beautiful caring completely fucking insane woman with all of my black little fucking heart ... She teases me with oreos stuffed into her bloody sweetness... she never tries to drag me down into the fucking planes of hell where nothing but misery lies waiting to engulf ones fucking mind... she is a wonderful mother, a wonderful person, an amazing lover... she is my friend, and she makes me laugh and fills me with wonder and adventure.. we attacked a ChuckECheeses which is hidden beyond the gates of doom in an unapproachable fortress within the realm of Hell which is called the Bronx...we survived the horseflesh they sold at the fucking Hilton as filetmignon... and we scared a tiny maid who burst into the room to see the chains and handcuffs and sexual toys sprawled across a bed for securing a Lady properly...ropes and anklecuffs and vibrating devices too insidious for the mind of a sheep to absorb...

she waits in the darkness for me...

in her eyes I am not a creature of Hell...

I am only Me...

She is my Dark Angel my Mad Countess,my love,my Faye, and my life...

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H1SMADCOUNT3SS
20:35 Nov 03 2016

I FUCKING LOVE YOU.

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