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I heard a person mention that science is complex, as opposed to religion which offers a simplistic fix to a problem. anyone who really knows me knows that i am not a fan of science in the least; this is why. science is like a spoiled little kid, who screams and whines whenever it doesn't get what it wants. I say this because scientists tend to like trying to put a simple explanation to things that can be written down. Science is afraid of the spirit realm and constantly call it 'stupid' or 'superstitious', what they are attempting to cover up is their fear of intangibles. Humans are naturally afraid of the mysterious, things we don't know, hence the spirit realm. Scintists are so convinced that if they can't see it or hear it or touch it or smell it, then it's not real, but are unwilling to use the massive amount of our insanely complex brain to examine the things that arn't tangible.

Science for many is a way of interacting with the world, a law of life, capable of explaining everything, and being able to prove or disprove the 'facts'. I'll put it out there that, yes, science is great for spreading easy-to-understand information, and is fantastic at explaining 'how' something happens, but is incapable of explaining 'why' something happens. Here's an example. The big bang theory. We have the idea that the universe was created by a big ass explosion that sent bajillions of dirt and dust and other such things flying everywhere. What that theory fails to do is to answer 'why' that explosion happened, or where the stuff that exploded came from, how it all started. I'd like to see a scientist explain how gravity pushed particles together. bullshit, don't believe any of that crap, there has to be a creator of some kind that made everything.

Here's something i really wanted to explain since beginning this. this is where i bash science for bashing spirituality and religion. If i told you that i was typing this on a black keyboard, you would immediately believe that i was typing a rather long rant on a black keyboard. But you can't personally see my black keyboard, so you put it out of my mind that i could be using a black keyboard. The keyboard is intangible, but you use the complexity of your own mind to acknowledge its existence. This is why i call scientists hypocrits, they deal with intangible things all the time, and myths that are unreliable. Such as computers. Computers are a myth commonly used by the 'reason based' men and women of science. You personally don't know if i exist, you don't really know if i'm an eighteen year old male from Connecticut. I could very well be a forty year old woman in Brazil, you would never know, but you assume it's true, hence it's a myth. I'm gonna stop now before this gets even more unorganized...

i came up with this idea about a week ago, and have been picking at it via my brain since. This is the first time i've recorded it. My theory is that those who live an unhappy life, and refuse to accept that they are, infact miserable, and do not try to express this unhappiness; are hundreds of times more difficult to 'enlighten' than a person who is obviously unhappy. A person who lements at the death of a close friend will always be easier and faster to recover than a lawyer who has spent his entire life lementing silently in his own self pity, and attempting to simply sweep it under a rug of money and material things. my theory is also that a person who claims to be fucked up, or claims to be dark or angry or sad or depressed is well on their way to recovery. These people have recognized the problem, which is the first step to solving anything.

I'm in an odd mood, i don't know why. I'm feeling depressed. The temptation is great to commit myself to a chemical castration. I feel like my sexuality, and my sexual wants/needs are beginning to betray me. I look at friends of mine far differently, even more than friends. i know it's normal, and i'm probably being a stupid teenager, but i'm a stupid teenager with respect and morals. I don't want to feel compelled to doing such things. It's frustrating. I've liked hugging and cuddling since i was really young, but now i'm beginning to feel addicted to it. I'm sure there's some greater underlying factor, or i'm just lonely and unwilling to admit it, i don't know...