The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

Tonight for some reason I felt nostalgic for a brief moment. Must be coming up on an anniversary. I thought about when I was first introduced to this site. It became my escape from reality. It made me think of everyone I had ever met on this site. Suddenly I remembered people I hadn't spoken to in years. I've probably been forgotten at this point. One day I just disappeared from the online world. I resurfaced after a couple of years but I was no longer the same person as before. I no longer belonged in what online world I was a part of. Now it seems like a different life. I only have the scars left behind to prove any of it was real.

I hope my oldest friends I've lost contact with over the years are all doing well. I'm sorry I didn't keep in better contact. My world was destroyed and I plunged head first in an abyss. I survived but am no longer the person you once knew.

I hope the dead who didn't deserve to die are resting in peace. I'm sorry I wasn't a better person who could save you. I can only hope you forgive me in the next life.

I hope the bad people who hurt me in so many different ways are getting their karma. I really hope Hell keeps you there. It's where you belong. In my next life, I won't be such a stupid, easy target.

I hope the one who used to visit me in my dreams is doing ok. I miss him sometimes. But it's been years and as I've said before I am probably forgotten.

There are sometimes I miss the nightmares. It's been years since I've dreamt of anything important enough to remember. I guess that makes my mind a sadist. I never felt alone after the nightmares.

Feeling alone is my own personal punishment. I once was a monster but hung my dark side and left it to die.

I'm ready for 2026 for the last 5 years I've done nothing but rebuild my life. I need a better year. I need a win.

2025 really hasn't been the best year. All I've done is work myself to the bone. I keep telling myself I have to. I have to keep burning my candle at both ends. I keep telling myself it's all necessary for my survival. I was hoping for a better year. I was hoping for sweet revenge for the destruction of my world. But I've fallen into a rut. Work, barely sleep, autopilot. Isn't there more to life than this? Even my inner turmoil has slowed. The nightmares slowed. I'm beginning to think I am not really alive just in some sort of purgatory or hell. Forgotten.

There just has to be more to life. If the world will end what will I even be remembered for? Oh yeah a dependable employee at a job I hated. When does it get better? When does the struggles ease?

Time for work. Again.