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Well, it is going to be one of those days, again. We have like no money. We are late paying bills. My wife isnt going to want to clean the house again, sooooo I am going to have to take care of that. We still need to get the crap ass vehicle fixed. not to mention, we enevr know when the case worker is going to come by the house,if that ever happens. We are both jobless, she seems to want to do more nothing then anything else.



I just feel as if life in an out of control spiral downwards and there is no way to make it stop. She wants to move to an expensive area and I just want to go somewhere where it is not. Sometimes, there is no way to know whats going on any more.



Sometimes, it is as if I dont even exsist anymore. Trying to figure her out is like trying to figure out as dead language or to disarm a nucleaur warhead with 20 secs left on the timer. It just never happens.



Sometimes, it just gets way to confusing for me. I ahve a seeing problem, she knows it. Then she ask me to get something for her. Then, when I can not find on the first or second try, she gets mad at me.



Things, I hope, will start getting better soon or I may just actually lose it completely.



Thats all for now my friends.



Have a lovely eternal night and watch for all those who are trying to hurt you or others you may know.

Well, had a pysch test this morning, and guess what, it turns out that I am a very sane person. Can you believe it, me, sane? That is a load of laughs because I feel anything but sane at this point in time.



Sometimes I feel as if I am going to explode and just go off on the next person that walks past me or looks at me funny, or even breathes werid. But hey, at least I know how to control it, unlike my wife's step mother.



She thinks that everything has to go her way. Either her way or the grave is more like it. All I have to say about her is that she has another thing coming. Something really big coming her weay that she will not expect at all.



But for now, maybe for today, that is all I have to say to my dark friends out in this cruel world of light.



Have a lovely eternal darkness and watch out for the sun and hunters. They are out after us all.

Yes, I know, sounds like a bad movie or something. But it is not, it is just a part of another segment called, my life. But it would make an very entertaining movie. LOL.



The first part called the rich. I hate rich people. They always seem to think they can get away everything. Cutting you off on the highway. making things up so they can try and sure you for it. Or just driving their flashy ass cars always trying to get attetion vbrought to themselves. Or trying to make it all about themselves, no matter what the situation is. I know quite a few people like that. Let those rich ass fucks live a day in my shoes, or let along, a month and I want to here them complain then about shit they have to go through everyday.



Now, the next segment, the poor. I know, I do not have that much money. I can not go out and get what I want, when I want. But hell, me and my wife make it by everyday and every month. And yet we still get complsints from people we do not even know. Hear complaints from much more "wealthy" people at how they can not afford something or something that cost too much and the price should be lower. Like a car, gas prices, bills or something like that. Pathetic is all I have to say about those kinda people. They need to learn how to get up once in awhile and see what is going on around them.



The last and final segment for now is the unforgivable. Thsi one may last for a little bit, so I hope who ever reads this is wide awake.



There are something these days that can be forgiven without a thought. Others, it takes time,but there are also some other things, that no matter what, can NEVER be forgiven. I am in one of those situaitons where the thing that I am being blamed for,which is something hanass and so out of this world that no one would ever be able to forgive anyone for doing it,that I would rather kill myself then do what I am being accused of. My accuser is my wife's bitchy little step mother who has hated me from day one. She hates me because I have no car, no big ass house, no money, and no job because of a slight medical condition I got from the military.



She is trying her best, or worst as I put it, to get me for child malestation and severy child abuse. She is getting a 5 year old girl to say things that no other five year old could possibly think of on her own. Brainwashing her and making her say the most insane things about something that nwever happen. I gureentee, that if half the peopl;e that knew me testify against her saying that there is no way in a cold day in hell that I am capable of these things, she would be locked up for the rest of her little ass, fucked up, living in the money moment life.



Please leave comments if you would like to and feel free to add me as a frind. Just be sure to tell me so that I may do the same as well. Thank you all and have a wonderful eternal night.



Watch out for the hunters as well.

Hello again all. Just wanted to pop in and type up another nice little read of my life and my thoughts.



I was born July 3rd, 1986. Well, at least for this life anyways. I grew up in a broken home. My mom was always doing what she could take care of us. My ex step father(aka Jerk Off Abusive S.O.B.) thought that since I was not his blood, I would make a good punching bag. And my three half sisters. They never got into any trouble. It was always put on me. Then my mom divorced his ass. I went and stayed with her, but I could not handle so I returned and stayed wioth him. He had said that he had changed for the better. Lieing ass prick still drank and hit me.



Then I stayed with his mother. No respect there what so ever. It was always" Andrew do this, Andrew do that." No time for me at all. Then, during my second 1oth grade year, I was sent to Job Corp in Cherokee, North Carolina. That is where I learned some of the carpentry trade and then joined the U.S. Army for almost 5 years. And trust me, I have some stories to tell from that experiance.



After being medically dischager (Honorably Dischargered) after serving almost my full term in the military, I went to stay with my mom in Fort Bragg, North Carolina. After staying there for 7 monthes, I was kicked out because I had an online relationship going on with my wife. That is when I came down to Pensacola Florida to spend 2 weeks with my now wife and her daughter.



Then, I went to stay with my real father,a douchbag, for like 3 monthes. They made me their servents. I had 2 other half sisters living there, which treated me like I did not exsist at all. After three monthes of what felt like years of serventude, I finally moved down here to Pensacola Florida to which I have been for over a year now.



Not to ghappy about the weather or our current situation, but hey, It will get better soon enough. Just hope it gets better much sooner than later.



Ok folks. Thats all for this attackment of my life and how it has sucked. LOL. There is more to come, just not really sure when. Have a nice eternal life of darkness.

Sometimes, people wander one thing,everyone does every once in awhile. The thing they wander is,"Life, is it really worth living?".



Trust me, I have been there and done that on several occations. I did that when I was in Job Corp in the mountains of Cherokee, North Carolina. I did that when my ex fiancee left me 3 monthes before I went back home to Germany from Iraq because of something that she thought was happening. I did that when I found out my ***** of an ex-wife was cheating on me and trying to take me for all my money. And sometimes, after me and my wife who I love with everything I am have an arguement, I still do it.



But the reason why I still am alive, well if you want to call a 253 year old curse alive, is because I am trying to make myself a better person and give my family a better life than I had ever had a chance to grow up in.



I am trying to go through school, even though I am slowly but surely losing my eye sight and my mind it feels like. I am trying my best to do all that I can to be understanding towards others. Staying calm when, at one time, I would of exploded and did something I would of regret.



Honestly, I am trying to become a much better man than I have known in my life and much better than I use to be.



I know that I have had a somewhat rough past, but I do plan on changing it. Plan on finding a way in life that is free and clear. But there is no free and clear way in life, now is tyhere? The only thing I can do now is stay out of the past and make more room for the future.



That is all for now. I may be posting several journals a week or even a day. Please feel free to add them and send me a response to them and tell me what you think. They will be telling my life story as I go.



Thank you all and have a nice, dark, eternal life.