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So, well damn I didn't expect it to hurt this much, but there you go serves me right for thinking I can just cancel five years of my life, doesn't work. Nope so now I'm sat here feeling well sick I guess coupled with the aching inside, really is not doing much for my birthday spirit.

I mean I've done thing's that have regretted in the past but this I shouldn't be regretting, I was right I'm sure I was. After all you can't spend your entire life living a lie? Right? No you can't so I'm right, but if I am why the hell does it hurt so much.

I should be able to just dust my hands of and get on with the things I really want to do, all the dreams I've had on hold for the past 5 years waiting for the right moment, to say 'hey I'm off for a bit' Thing's never work out the way I plan.

Still here's to the future and all the twists and turns it has in store for me.