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Welcome to my home.

Hell within the dome.



People with black robes passing by.

Couldn't see past their mask, even if you try.



See the smiles on the real ones face?

See the tears leaving their trace?

See the red glowing eyes behind the mask?

See the blue eyes of the Angels after his task?



In ones face,

the one with the tear trace.

The one with the red eye.

The one who refuses to really cry.



The one with the blood all over their robe.

The one known threw out the globe.

The one with the small smile on his face.



A smile hidden behind his mask.

A smile, one not to ask.



A smile hidden in the heart.

The one whom lives with a missing part.



The red eyes will turn blue

only past the mask can you see what’s true.



The mask of emptiness.

The mask of cold.

The mask as hard as gold.

The mask full of the lies told.



A dark mask for a dark heart.

But not if your really smart.



Look behind the red eye.

You will see what wants to cry.

You will see an Angel fly.

You will see a wounded heart die.

You will see, an Angel behind a Demons eye.

Well I've done it again

Another love tossed away

I've broken his heart

And in the process my own

This can't go on

But how can I stop it?

I need him to live

He may not know it

But he's my only reason for living

And Ive messed it up again

This is getting out of control

I need to get out

I need to stop hurting him

I need to leave...

I'm doing the same thing

That I always do

Find someone perfect

THen screw it up

With all my damned problems

I try so hard to hide them

Can't lose him

Not this one

I love him to the point of pain

I'm pathetic, aren't I?

I cant even hold on to my mate...

A simple task like this

Should come easy

But I am so screwed up

That I can't help

But to lose the one for me

He's the one and I can't hold on

I'm losing grip...

He's getting tired...

There's nothing I can do

The agony and fear I have caused

Is unfair to him...

I need to get out

I need to stop hurting him

I need to leave...

Enough is enough

Every time I look into his eyes

I can see that little addition

That extra glimmer of pain

That I have caused him

I am being unfair to the man

That holds my heart so securely

He is my lord and master

I love him dearly

But I am slowly destroying him

I need to get out

I need to stop hurting him

I need to leave...

I'm swimming all alone in a pool of darkness

And I feel like darkness is slowly pulling me under

I yell for help but no one is there to hear it

I begin to see the water at eye level

And I kick and flail and stuggle

Fighting to stay above the darkness

But the darkness won't let go of it's hold on me

And I slowly begin to give in to the feeling

That lies below the water line

The waters starts to fill my lungs

These lungs that once held so much life

Yet now they allow the murky water to replace that

I know that this path doesn't lead to happiness

But why doesn't someone grab my hand

And pull me from darkness's grasp?

Because no one knows I stand at the boundary...

The boundary between light and dark

So I give in to the thing that holds me

All of the strength and all of the courage

That I once held securely in my heart

Can't save me from the water anymore

So I slowly slip below the world of conscientiousness

Undetected by the occupants of that existance

I don't want to fight anymore

I've given in to darkness...

There's no going back now...

Goodbye may seem to mean forever

Farewell may seem to mean the end

But inside my breaking heart

I cling tight to a memory

One that can last forever

So special that it will never end

This memory of our love

Shall echo on and on

When we met it seemed so simple

It seemed to me that

You neede me so very much

But as time went on

It became crystal clear

That I needed you too

We completed eachother

You made me laugh

And together we cried

But it seems, precious love,

That we are not meant to be

No matter how hard we've tried

Dear, we must seperate now

And go our different ways

We must say goodbye

And give a wave farewell

But goodbye is not forever

And farewell is not the end

Razor blade kisses

Such a sweet thing

So addicting...

I swear, they come to me

They leave you with scars

And sometimes broken hearts

But it’s a game they like to play

So come...

Pierce my skin

And leave me with a kiss

I scream and cry

Just wanting to die...

The kisses of suicide...

The tears I shed are no longer clear

They are now stained by my blood

It’s normal when the razorblade kisses me

Taking me down into my world...

Kisses Of suicide...

Razorblade kisses

Such a sweet thing

Just take it all away...

Cold crisp air filling a dark insufferable room

This room being more of a prison or coffin

In whatever perspective you wanna take it

The doors keeping all hope out

As well as anything positive from ever entering

These four stone walls

The shades are constantly pulled down

For no light will enter or be welcomed in

All who enter see this dark, suffering and hopeless place

And yet, it is home to many at some time

A place of solidarity and hopelessness

But a place comforted by these cold walls

That close them in so confidently

This is their world, their home

For they are locked into it

Once you have visited this place

Leaving requires great strength

It is a frightfully lonely place

But for those who enter

Loneliness is already a part of who they are

The time is dull and passes rather slowly

Sleep is an endless hobby for so many

The endless dreams of what may never come

Brings more of the defeated into this world

A world that welcomes all those like them

Who see the outside as a hurtful place

Dreams that may never come true

And love that falls apart

Many here seek refuge from the pain,

Wanting time to pass hastily

So that their "Maker" will soon be met

The "Maker" will be the only sign of hope and happiness

They will ever experience

The "Maker", who enters this dark and lowly place,

Slipping in through the shadows of this despair

Some say this world is not for them

And I pray it may never be

For all that enter this place are damned

To never feel all that is good outside

Nor will they have the desire to

Some pull themselves out of this place

But many die within these walls fearful, hurting and lonely

Again, I pray that you never need see this world

Of which I am a regular visitor in

Harsh words & violent blows

Hidden secrets nobody knows

Eyes are open, hands are fisted

Deep inside I'm warped & twisted

So many tricks & so many lies

Too many whens & too many whys

Nobody's special, nobody's gifted

I'm just me, warped & twisted

Sleeping awake & choking on a dream

Listening loudly to a silent scream

Call my mind, the number's unlisted

Lost in someone so warped & twisted

On my knees, alive but dead

Look at the invisible blood I've bled

I'm not gone, my mind has drifted

Don't expect much, I'm warped & twisted

Burnt out, wasted, empty, & hollow

Today's just yesterday's tomorrow

The sun died out, the ashes sifted

I'm still here, warped & twisted

For just those few weeks

I had you to myself

And that seems too short a time

To be changed so profoundly.

In those few weeks,

I came to know you...

And to love you.

You came to trust me with your life.

Oh what a life I had planned for you!

Just those few weeks...

When I lost you,

I lost a lifetime of hopes,

Of plans, dreams and aspirations.

A slice of my future simply vanished overnight.

Just those few weeks...

It wasn't enough time to convince others

How special and important you were.

How odd, a truly unique person has recently died

And no one is mourning the passing.

Just a mere few weeks..

And no "normal" person would cry all night

Over a tiny unfinished baby,

Or get depressed and withdraw

Day after endless day.

No one would, so why am I??

You were just those few weeks, my little one.

You darted in and out of my life too quickly.

But it seems that's all the time you needed

To make my life richer

And to give me a small glimpse of eternity.

COMMENTS

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demonlovesyou
16:55 Oct 11 2008

A lovely poem very deep and clear metaphor



Lovely flow of rhyme flown from heavenly mount through heavenly vallies and fall in ocean of sad...



I loved this poem.

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POST COMMENT

As I sit and remember

When you were still a part of me

I try to forget...

Your life was never meant to be.

You were given a life, a soul, a name

But now things will never be the same.

You were mine to give life to

Though only for a while

Things had changed...

I will never see your smile.

Yet my love for you

Will never disappear

Though your voice, your laugh,

I will never get to hear.

You will always be my baby

Though I've never seen your face.

Not a thing in this world

Can ever take your place.

How do I say goodbye?

When I didn't get to say hello?

I want so bad to keep you

How do I let you go?

I have so many dreams

So much love I want to share

There's nothing I can do

Why is death so unfair?

You're my perfect angel

I dreamed you long ago

I never got to hold you

And it breaks my heart to let you go

The pain and confusion I feel inside

I can not explain...I can not describe

The Goddess will rock you in your cradle

And watch you as you sleep

I will love you in my heart

Because that's all I get to keep

You are blessed my child

You're in the warm Summerland

You'll never be alone

You have Mommy & Daddy's love

Hush my little baby...you need not ever cry

You were always wanted!

I wish you didn't die

You'll be my sunshine in the daylight

And the brightest star at night

Reach for Artemis's hand and go into the light

I would rather endure the pain

Of losing you right now

Than the thought of you suffering

Through this life

We'll get through somehow

I was blessed to have you briefly

Even though I have to let you go

I wish I knew the reason why

But I guess I'll never know