The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

This is how I feel
18:30 Jul 14 2005
Times Read: 546

It's the truth
18:29 Jul 14 2005
Times Read: 547

This sums it all up.
18:29 Jul 14 2005
Times Read: 548

Too good to last.
18:17 Jul 14 2005
Times Read: 550






What a pity... I didn't think it would end so soon.



Guilt is an amazing thing.



I don't even know what to write. I am just sad.



I didn't sleep last night even though I should have been able to.. I got what my body needed... So just by that I should have slept. And my body... well my body wanted to sleep... it was exhausted... it felt as heavy as the earth its self... but sadness prevented that blessed slumber.



He broke it off with me.



He fucked me, then fucked me over.



And I am a horrible person. I am not sad that I was helping someone commit adultery.. I am sad that I lost my play toy.



Ugh I feel ill with myself...



I realized that he was the first boy I had been with that I actually cared about...



He asked me when we were finished what expectations I had about our situation, and I said that I didn't have any.. because I truely didn't know...



But... I guess it was more what I wasn't expecting...



I wasn't expecting it to be over so soon...



I didn't expect to care.



I didn't expect to be hurt so much.



I shouldn't have cared... it was just sex.. Right?



.... Right?





Why do I do this to my self? Why do I go after the boys I can't have?



I think it used to be my safety net... Crush after my best friends guy because I knew I couldn't have him... I knew nothing would ever happen. Well I wasn't expecting this... I never thought I would be the other woman...



I never knew I would fuck up this royally.



The sad part is... I still want him... I still want to be with him...



At least the sex was good while it lasted...



... Right?

The Plague of Redheads
21:07 Jul 11 2005
Times Read: 552

Okay, so what is it with Redheads and me?



Sheesh, now I have this little redhead girl at faire in love with me... I'm flattered, but sheesh... they seem to flock to me.



She's very cute... I think I might try it, but at the same time... I wouldn't want to break her heart.. she's so sweet...



Ehhh there's only three more weeks of faire left.. who know what will happen.. and either way I think I want to hang out with her because she's a cool chick... if something happens well.. thats a different story. So stay tuned. Same bat time, same bat channel...





P.S. Even though plastic fruit looks like food, that doesn’t mean you can eat it…

Oh Great...
18:03 Jul 07 2005
Times Read: 557

I can feel it...



I'm about to go into heat.



This is great. I'm trying to be a good girl.. I'm trying to stay away from the boys...



But damnnit... Why... why do I go into heat, where I want to shag any thing that walks. This is unfair.... I'm tring to be good...



I'm trying to ignore this sensation...



I can't even suck on a lollipop it gets my blood boiling...



Purr baby Purr...



I need to get fixed. This isn't fair.

And the bed is broken
18:02 Jul 07 2005
Times Read: 559

Okay, so this is not a recent entry, but an entry none the less.. I believe this is from Feb. But it seems to apply. This was back when I was working 2 jobs, one being over night... and I was about to go on a trip



And the bed is broken





Sleep… what a novel concept. 34 hours and counting since the last time my eyes got to close, and my mind got to dream. Where am I? oh yeah work… computers… run program… wait… check it… wait…. Run program… on and on… What am I doing today? Oh yeah… I was supposed to see a boy… wait… which boy?... tall… light eyes. run program… David? I don’t think so… I don’t remember… run program… nod off… what time is it? Damn still at work… what was I doing? Run program… why have I just looked at the same set of numbers 6 times in a row? 6… that’s when I get off of work. Theres a boy… which boy? Eric? No… he has to work. Run program… send fax… run program… What am I doing tonight? Must pack… I leave for New York in less than 12 hours… Lunch… Go see Eric… he’s not the boy, but he’ll do for lunch. Food… dinner? Who was it? Back at work… run program… fall asleep for a minute… oops cant do that… check program… need sleep… call David… dinner? YES! But not tonight… darn… so close… Run program… chat with wenches… think naughty thoughts… wasn’t there something I was supposed to do this evening? Who was it? Run through cell phone… call G. Dinner? YES! But cant… something came up… well at least now I can sleep… look at clock… 5… can go home soon… need to pack for trip… run program…. Answer phone, “Hello this is Erin..”… Send joke to coworker… No dinner? Damn that means I have to cook… run program… nod off… boss walks by… doesn’t care that I’m not doing anything important… at least I’m awake… less then an hour and I get to go home… go to sleep… damn.. the beds broken… must fix bed… then sleep.

Money is the root of all evil
20:36 Jul 06 2005
Times Read: 565

Thats all I can say. Money sucks.



I hate money. I wish that we would just go back to the barter system. I'd be living the posh life if we were... sheesh I tell ya.







P.S. green means go... and red means don't go... but stop means don't go and then go!

My Independance
00:33 Jul 05 2005
Times Read: 579

Happy Independance Day to me!!!



No this has nothing to do with America, and the whole war we fought so many years ago.



This has everything to do with me, 1 year ago declaring my independance from my virginity.



Yup. One year ago today I lost my virginity.



Woot Woot. Go me.



I am glad I waited. I actually enjoyed it.



And today... (well kind of today.. i don't know what time it was)



I did infact celebrate it by enjoying the carnal pleasures of the flesh that was the whole reason i was celebrating.



Yup.. I gots laid. Go me.



Rather enjoyed it.



Now if only I could get that everyday...

My insomnia problems would go away.



Thank you for listening to broadcast report.

You may return to your schedualed programing now.







P.S. if you spot a bear... freeze... don't move... this makes you easier pray so the bear doesn't have to catch its breath causing unnecessary pain and suffering for you....