The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

what is the point in giving your love to some one when they just leave and give it to some one else in the end..... what is the point in living to die....... what is the point and trying to good when you just get fucked over in the end what is the point in crying is the tears change nothing....... why wait for it all to end when you can just do it your self.......i hate this place...... i hate this life i hate the choices that i have made..............i hate all that i know

well now we are just friends when i am not here but when i am we are to gather....... i guess it worksout i still think i am going to think of you just the same as if we were to gather for always..... what i want to know is why .... who is this for more? i mean really ...... i do not want it to be this way but you really are pushing for it to happen is it really you that wants the freedom to have guilt free fun? or are you pushing for it so hard so that i do not relize that it is nothing but a test to see if i am really going to fuck another man just as your ex wife did? if i am going to commit my self to coming back when i am out of school i am going to commit all of my love to you not just be committed to you when i am in town that is not how love works you cannot just turn it on and off when ever you feel like it...... i hope this is what you really want and i hope it really does work out i love you......

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heartmender
18:51 Aug 20 2008

WOW HOW DARE YOU ..... YOU BETTER HOPE I HAVE A FEW DAYS TO COOL AFTER READING THIS OTHERWISE YOU MAY NEVER WANT TO TALK TO ME AGAIN

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when every thing that you want is ripped right from you with no reguard as to how you feel how should you react....... when the reason that you woke up every day leaves because it is what they see as fair...... why should you wake up? what is it that you are now going to live for...... when every one that you want and need in your life stepsout.... why should you live it..... it seems to me that the attitudes that you let in to your life are the ones that your life then adapts to...... if you every day have some one that tells you nothing will ever work you will soon be in that mind set and that is what then will happen........ so you may ask where does that leave me......... well at this pointi have no faith that any thing thati am going through is going to get any better....... i do not yet regret any thing that i have done...... i do not even know if i could have done any thing any better.............. the onl,y thing that i rreally whant to know is why...... why any thing ..... if what i want is wront or un fair to me then who is to say that i am going to ever dp any thing good for my self...... as far as i know all i do is destroy any thing good that comes to me and any one that comes in to my life.......... i guess what i really want to know is how is every one going to feel when i finnally step up and do what i want for my self and be sure that i am not going to impact them any futher....

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heartmender
18:46 Aug 20 2008

wow cant tell who all theseare directed at....

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POST COMMENT

what i thought was a light happened not to be a light at all only a blink of what could have been..... now all is gone and i fear i shal never see it again.... it is said that it is fair to me but taking all that i want is not fair........ you say that it will one day be what made me happy but i fear it is going to be the one thing i wish never would have happened................ i do not want to lose you but i feel as if you are gone as we speak i wish that i could understand why it is you think that this has to be done but i guess i will let what you want play out and see where it will take us.... .if it leads to the down fall of what we could have had then our down fall is what i await..... i just hope that i never have to see it...... if the blink does happen to really be the light i hoped i had once found...............