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ravensblood's Journal


ravensblood's Journal

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16 entries this month
 

pfft

05:33 Aug 31 2005
Times Read: 666


ok.. i have just one word .... men..... ooo make that two... testosterone....... idiots!

big ole hairy baboons!


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taming that wild stallion earl!

01:14 Aug 31 2005
Times Read: 670


hmm.. ok.. im sitting here.. looking out the window.. and ya know.. its really really yellow out there... its kinda creepy.. like one of those old timey photographs... rather interesting....anyway...i just got in from taking mom to therapy... however when we got back to the house.. it was monsooning... so i got drenched trying to get her inside.. which was fine... only i was wearing an outfit that kinda clings when wet.. and it was cold.. so ya.. heh.. that was just a funny sight... anyway.. after getting her inside i just decided to jump in the front yard... and lay on the grass while the thunder rumbled... and the lightening popped... it was pretty good.. till i got too cold.. and had to come inside..heh.. im still wet now.. but... happy.. and yes i am aware of how bad that sounded... speaking of being bad though...

the night before last... kataryne and i went out.. and rode big earl!... that mechanical poney that we so enjoy riding downtown.. so we each took a turn taming that stallion... and then rode it together... heh.. lets just say we had quite an audience ... but who cares... i think they are just jealous they don't cut lose.. ... anyway.. i think im gonna study for a bit.. speech time tomorrow blah.. i suppose ill update it tomorrow and vent about how horribley it went :(


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possessed by bob hope part II

04:46 Aug 29 2005
Times Read: 675


so im sitting here... rather dreading the coming week.. mainly because i have to give my speech... but nothing i can do about that but suck it up and do it i suppose.. its so ridiculous that i should worry about so trivial a thing.. i mean.. there is so much more important things going on in the world.. and this has me terrified.. its retarded...

meanwhile i have had a pretty interesting day... had a pretty long chat with fred... which was quite amusing... those long chats behind the couch really are strange... the topics anyway.. but.. i enjoy them.. oh ya.. and since i know his affinity for 3rd person actions i shall have to leave him one heh.. *pounces ya and pokes ya*..

hmm.. anyway.. later on today mom really decided to let out some pent up anger... and lets just say her throwing arm is getting better... as is her aim at various random objects

after she cooled down a bit i took her to town... shopping.. which was kinda funny..least watching me trying to get her wheel chair packed in the trunk of my car.... it about fell on me a couple of times.. but seeing as how i live in a town where men think its way more amusing to watch girls struggle with heavy things.. as opposed to getting off their large, hairy asses and helping... thats how it is

anyway.. on the way home we picked up pizza... and had a whole family thing...but unfortunately they decided to put on a whole bunch of shark movies.. which really blew seeing as how i truly hate those movies... gah... i can still see them in my head...

hmm well atleast i didn't get stuck riding around town today with my mom and grandparents in their car... with country ho-down music blaring ......with the windows down..... with them singing along with it.....heh.. that was just plain scarey...



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sleepy

06:02 Aug 28 2005
Times Read: 682


its really wierd when you think you have a person figured out.. and they turn out to be completely the opposite... lately that seems to be how alot of things are going... nothing is ever what it seems.. and i guess that keeps me on my toes.. but its highly confusing and a bit annoying...

hmm.. yesterday i came to the conclusion that it takes entirely too long to shave long legs... but.. it beats running around with gorilla legs.. but still its annoying... hmm.. i have alot more to say.. but this isn't the place for it.. so i shall put that in the other journal... heh. im going to bed now though


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more about me now

19:54 Aug 27 2005
Times Read: 685


Really Long Survey (over 200)

Created by starsbleed2nite and taken 121424 times on Bzoink

What is your name?jennifer
Are you named after anyone?bob
What's your screename?demonic_soul18
Would you name a child of yours after you?hell no
If you were born a member of the opposite sex what would your name be?bob
If you could switch names with a friend who would it be?merv >:)
Are there any mispronounciations/typos that ppl do w/ your name constantly?too many to list
Would you drop your last name if you became famous?hell yes
Basics
Your gender:female
Straight/Gay/Bi:straight
Single?presently
If not, do you want to be?why would i date someone then
Birthdate:november 5
Your age:19
Age you act:depends who im around
Age you wish you were:19 is good
Your height:6'1''
Eye color:big brown cow eyes :(
Happy with it?only when the sun hits them just right :)
Hair color:brown with red streaks
Happy with it?mmhmm
Lefty/righty/ambidextrous:righty!
Your living arrangement:with my mom and 2 cats
Your family:varies
Have any pets?2 kitties
Whats your job?annoying the hicks around here while attending college
Piercings?3 in my ears
Tattoos?not yet :(
Obsessions?lime lifesavers
Addictions?lime lifesavers and riding big earl the plastic pony with mervy
Do you speak another language?some french
Have a favorite quote?nothing says tie me up and bang me like wearing a pair of socks
Do you have a webpage?nope... im computer illiterate
Deep Thoughts About Life and You in it
Do you live in the moment?everyday
Do you consider yourself tolerant of others?highly
Do you have any secrets?oodles of them
Do you hate yourself?nah.. just intense dislike at times
Do you like your handwriting?no.. it looks like a 12 year olds
Do you have any bad habits?not telling
What is the compliment you get from most people?uhm...i dunno :)
If a movie was made about your life, what would it be called?bob and merv ride again!
What's your biggest fear?sharks
Can you sing?when no one is around :)
Do you ever pretend to be someone else just to look cool?hell no
Are you a loner?usually
What are your #1 priorities in life?see the world
If you were another person, would you be friends with you?i hope so
Are you a daredevil?sometimes
Is there anything you fear or hate about yourself?maybe :)
Are you passive or agressive?very passive
Do you have a journal?mmhmm
What is your greatest strength and weakness?hmm.. i shall remain silent on that one too
If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?my fear of public speaking
Do you think you are emotionally strong?usually
Is there anything you regret doing/not doing in life?sometimes
Do you think life has been good so far?eh.. it has its ups and downs
What is the most important lesson you've learned from life?to not trust people
What do you like the most about your body?my nose .. and mouth
And least?everything else hehe
Do you think you are good looking?hell no
Are you confident?not really
What is the fictional character you are most like?jenny thornton
Are you perceived wrongly?most often
Do You...
Smoke?no
Do drugs?no
Read the newspaper?sometimes
Pray?to many things
Go to church?as a child
Talk to strangers who IM you?mmhmm
Sleep with stuffed animals?i plead the 5th on grounds of self-incrimination :)
Take walks in the rain?always
Talk to people even though you hate them?heh.. yah.. i need to work on that
Drive?mhmm
Like to drive fast?most definitely .. vroom vroom
Would or Have You Ever?
Liked your voice?i do ..hehe
Hurt yourself?yup
Been out of the country?to france..hehe
Eaten something that made other people sick?not that i remember
Been in love?yup
Done drugs?no
Gone skinny dipping?all the time >:)
Had a medical emergency?mmhmm
Had surgery?yup
Ran away from home?once
Played strip poker?yup
Gotten beaten up?no
Beaten someone up?not really
Been picked on?alot
Been on stage?mmhmm
Slept outdoors?yup
Thought about suicide?eh... a long time ago
Pulled an all nighter?oh yes
If yes, what is your record?49 hours
Gone one day without food?yup
Talked on the phone all night?hehe.. done that one alot
Slept together with the opposite sex w/o actually having sex?yup
Slept all day?no
Killed someone?no
Made out with a stranger?hm.. i dont think so
Had sex with a stranger?icky no
Thought you're going crazy?occasionally
Kissed the same sex?once
Done anything sexual with the same sex?hmm many many aeons ago
Been betrayed?too many times
Had a dream that came true?mmhmm
Broken the law?hmm.. shhhhhhhhh
Met a famous person?yup
Have you ever killed an animal by accident?unfortunately
On purpose?hell no.. icky!
Told a secret you swore you wouldn't tell?... once
Stolen anything?once when i was 7
Been on radio/tv?nope
Been in a mosh-pit?oh no
Had a nervous breakdown?felt like it
Bungee jumped?nope
Had a dream that kept coming back?mmhmm
Beliefs
Belive in life on other planets?mmhmm
Miracles?yup
Astrology?maybe
Magic?yup
God?maybe
Satan?maybe
Santa?most definitely! *sits in santa's lap*
Ghosts?mmhmm
Luck?mmhmm
Love at first sight?maybe on very rare occasions
Yin and yang (that good cant exist w/o bad)?yup
Witches?mmhmm
Easter bunny?oh yes
Believe its possible to remain faithful forever?yes
Believe theres a pot of gold at the end of a rainbow?maybe :)
Do you wish on stars?sometimes..hehe
Deep Theological Questions
Do you believe in the traditional view of Heaven and Hell?no
Do you think God has a gender?maybe.. i never looked
Do you believe in organized religion?no
Where do you think we go when we die?over there *points*
Friends
Do you have any gay/lesbian friends?lots
Who is your best friend?kataryne! (my mervy!)
Who's the one person that knows most about you?kataryne
What's the best advice that anyone has ever given to you?never ride the plastic pony without a blanket
Your favourite inside joke?the dick pink with merv
Thing you're picked on most about?my....hmm.. heh.. nvm
Who's your longest known friend?jamie
Newest?this is gonna sound horrible.. but i don't think i even know his name :(
Shyest?wade
Funniest?kataryne
Sweetest?nora
Closest?kataryne
Weirdest?toss up between brett and brandon :)
Smartest?fahmin
Ditziest?jamie
Friends you miss being close to the most?lee :(
Last person you talked to online?i still don't know his name.. so we will call him fred
Who do you talk to most online?thats a tossup
Who are you on the phone with most?lately dean :)
Who do you trust most?kataryne
Who listens to your problems?kataryne
Who do you fight most with?kevin
Who's the nicest?nora
Who's the most outgoing?jan
Who's the best singer?i dunno
Who's on your shit-list?kevin
Have you ever thought of having sex with a friend?oh no
Who's your second family?they all are..
Do you always feel understood?not usually
Who's the loudest friend?jan
Do you trust others easily?no
Who's house were you last at?jamie
Name one person who's arms you feel safe in:hmm.. that would be no one.. least right now anyway hehe
Do your friends know you?some of them know a part of me
Friend that lives farthest away:lee
Love and All That
Do you consider love a mistake?eh.. it depends i guess
What do you find romantic?night time walks... candles.. stomes. hehe
Turn-on?sense of humor, willingness to get to know the real me
Turn-off?arrogant dickheads who want sex
First kiss?was not very romantic.. i accidently bit his tongue :(
If someone u had no interest in had interest in dating u how would u feel?bad...but i would not date them
Do you prefer knowing someone before dating them or goingmmhmm
Have u ever wished it was more socially acceptable 4 a girl 2 ask a guy outoh no
Have you ever been romantically attracted to someone physically unattractivyup, its the mind that matters most anyway
Do you think the opposite sex finds you good looking?oh no
What is best about the opposite sex?heh.. i can't say.. its really strange
What is the worst thing about the opposite sex?it varies...
What's the last present someone gave you?a necklace :)
Are you in love?not presently
Do you consider your significant other hot?if i was dating someone maybe
Who Was the Last Person...
That haunted you?i don't know his name
You wanted to kill?kevin
That you laughed at?kataryne
That laughed at you?kataryne :)
That turned you on?fred :)
You went shopping with?kataryne
That broke your heart?lee
To disappoint you?annie
To ask you out?jason
To make you cry?kevin
To brighten up your day?fred
That you thought about?hehe... fred
You saw a movie with?my mom
You talked to on the phone?james
You talked to through IM/ICQ?jason
You saw?kataryne
You lost?chad :( miss him alot too
Right This Moment...
Are you going out?maybe later on
Will it be with your significant other?nope
Or some random person?hehe..kataryne
What are you wearing right now?short black skirt and black shirt.. *wiggles her eyebrows*
Body part you're touching right now:not telling hehe.. jk
What are you worried about right now?my speech coming up on wednesday
What book are you reading?some random romance novel
What's on your mousepad?a wolf
Use 5 words to describe how you're feeling:antsy, sleepy, nervous, amused, and oddly enough.. a bit randy :)
Are you bored?mmhmm
Are you tired?mmhmm
Are you talking to anyone online?not anymore
Are you talking to anyone on the phone?nope
Are you lonely or content?kinda lonely
Are you listening to music?not yet

Create a Survey | Search Surveys | Go to Bzoink


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who's a naughty little honey bee >:)

06:41 Aug 25 2005
Times Read: 689


okie.. im back.. still confused as ever.. but slightly more amused... *does a mexican hat dance around the stripper pole*... hmm this is very amusing.. all i need now are my bunny ears... and victim to wear my antlers that have the bells on them... hmm whoever shall it be >:D


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rubber girl weeeeeeeeeeeee

04:10 Aug 25 2005
Times Read: 692


hmm.. tonight im really antsy... i mean.. i've been antsy before.. but this really tops it i think... im ready to drive myself to the airport.. and hop on a plane.. to where ..i have no idea.. but just somewhere... preferably far away from here.... just for lack of something stimulating mentally....

hmm.. .you know.. its rather dull realizing that you mean absolutely nothing to someone... i mean.. even when you think you don't matter much you still figure..hey.. they still atleast act like they remember you... but not even that... heh... just lovely..actually.. its not depressing more more than kind of something irritating in the background...nothing that i won't get over though :) guess when stuff like that happens alot rebound time lessens and lessens.. soon.. it won't even bother me.. things will just bounce off me like rubber.. heh.. ill be rubber girl.. hmm.. which now that i say that aloud.. maybe i should rethink that name... i sound like a condom :l eh well... i do have a cape.. hmm.. ok.. heh.. enough on that... hmmm...

i think its time i go out again... get into some mischief that will take my mind off this latest ass, which shouldn't be too hard.. heh.. i hope.. hmm... oh yah...one of my friend's ex's thats in my public speaking class seems to really be hitting on me... which is kinda gross...considering things.... blah.. some people are so dumb...and something else.. what is it with sex?... why does everyone seem to just want to go bang everyone else... its retarded.. then when you don't want to engage in meaningless acts of fornication .. people treat ya like a leper... oh well.. just more that shows that people are shallow and narrowminded... not all that surprising :)


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...realizations

03:11 Aug 24 2005
Times Read: 697


okie, so here i am again.. same story.. different day... its pretty late at night as usual when i decide to feel like writing... hmm.. i spent alot of time tonight trying to figure out what im supposed to talk about for my first speech... and then filling out some workbook pages for my public speaking class...and i have come to the conclusion that not only do i hate this class for the simple fact i have to give speeches.. but also because its like an invasion of privacy... sure i may play around alot.. but when it comes down to it... im a very private person.. and i see no need to tell about me or my life story to a room full of people who aren't even interested in the first place...my past is just that... mine.. and there is no reason i should have divulge it to a room full of judgemental dickheads, just so i can pass a class... its ridiculous... pfft

as for everything else thats going on... things are moving kinda slow... atleast they seem to anyway.. everything drags on so very long it seems... i know once i hit christmas atleast my load will be somewhat lighter being done with my public speaking class... maybe then mom will be a bit better and we can start getting back to the way things were.. or sort of anyway... considering things will never be as they once were...hmm.. and something else... im getting kinda tired of making an effort of speaking to someone... its kinda irritating having to iniate things all the time.... so i think i shall just leave it be till they decide to either come around .. or ignore me completely... besides.. why should i care if they don't?... i've got more than enough to worry about... speaking of which.. my court date to give my deposition is coming up in september.. which im dreading.. but blah... hopefully they will realize that that old fart is just trying to get something for nothing...i truly hope they see through her act... but the way things are going now.. i'll probably have to do the whole court /jury thing... i don't even know what to think anymore... there are so many things in my head... yet.. i don't really tell anyone... and even when i do... i realize that they aren't anyones but my own problems... sometimes its just nice to talk.. without having to worry whether the next thing you say or not is gonna have the person ignoring you... pfft...


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weeeeeeee?

03:36 Aug 23 2005
Times Read: 700


okie... so.. today.. i was pretty bad.. i played sick..heh...and ended up sleeping a good bit.. but i figure its ok because i've been pretty burnt out lately anyway... at the moment.. im deciding on topics for one of my speeches... which i am dreading most terribly... but.. i have no choice.. so better to shut up and do it than lament my woes ... atleast i think i picked an interesting topic... im going with my major of criminal psychology.... that will give me enough info. atleast to make an interesting speach... i hope... actually.. im thinking about writing a guy who knows about as much as a person can know about that subject.... Jason Moss.. he actually wrote to manson, gacy, dahmer, ramirez and hmm.. seems like there was another.. but i forget now.. maybe not.. but anyway... he wrote them while he was in college for criminal psych. then actually met with gacy..and almost became the next victim.. heh.. hence the name of his book " the last victim"...

as for anything else.. im actually quite bored...oooooooo we got the most wonderful storm today... it cooled everthing down so much... i went outside on the porch and watched the rain and lightning popping.. and listened to the booms of thunder... i really love doing that.. its so peaceful.. ...


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ride that chair! >:)

04:27 Aug 22 2005
Times Read: 705


hmm.. ok.. so i think i sobered up a bit from the last entry...hehe ..only in the respect that im not bouncing off the walls.. but im thinking about stradling the roller chair and riding around the living room for the hell of it... maybe give my ass a few spanks as i ride that chair... *coughs*.. yeah.. and the funny thing is.. i turned down a date tonight.. to watch a movie alone... and ride my chair around the living room..hehe.. but.. i think i chose the better of the 2... the dude who asked me out is so dull.. he just stares at me... like im gonna do a trick.. which i might.. but purely as amusement for myself... which i had to do on the first date out.. like hmm.. a good many weeks ago..eeeeeeeek....ack... some people never change.. then again.. there are those who act so damn confusing that ya really wanna get in their head and figure out if its really as spazzy as they make it seem...

oooooooo im supposed to be reading part of the Bible for my world lit. class tomorrow.. but im not.. im such a bad little school girl.. *breaks out the chains and whips*.. hmm.. hehe.. ok.. stopping that there.. no need to make my journal x-rated...i feel that i have already violated myself.. so that would just be wrong.. hmm.. i think.... that..... its time to sliding into the kitchen wearing socks and underwear to get some orange juice... hopefully .. not waking anyone up.............speaking of which.......

i heard some slappy noises a while ago.. turns out.. my grandparents were ..well.. ya.. then i heard a "you little wildcat!"...after that i shut a couple doors and hid in the closet.. its safer here...till some maniac decides to poke you with nana... speaking of which.. i think... its time for that juice....


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no sanity here

04:32 Aug 19 2005
Times Read: 711


hmm.. ok.. so its about 11:30 at night.. im going a little stir crazy..everyone is in bed... and all i wanna do is go streaking through the woods... with the exception of wear some flip flops... hehe.. tender feet... hmm.. why oh why ... do i always wanna streak through the woods?... one of those deep questions i suppose.. not really.. eeeek.. im scaring myself...

ooooo.. tomorrow kataryne (mistressnightshade) and i are going to hang out... grab some pizza, wings, cheese sticks, movies, and a trucker..hehe.. ok.. sorry.. that was just in there for effect... the trucker part anyway.. hmm.. and why the hell am i appoligizing to an online journal... another deep question... hmm.. well. .. i must say. .today has been a rather odd sort of a day... but i can say with all certainty.. that one day.. i shall have a pole in my room... hmm.. i think my bed is calling me now.. too many strange thoughts


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nothing says tie me up and bang me like wearing a pair of socks

04:20 Aug 17 2005
Times Read: 716


hmm...okie....so today has been one of those days... long...dull ...boring... and its only tuesday...heh.. only my second day of classes ..and it feels more like my 89th or something....the highlight of the day was watching phantom of the opera..yet again..hehe..though it never gets old... still makes me wanna cry when i see it... oooooooooooooooooooooo i just went sliding past mom's door to her room.. with my sock... and t-shirt on... whilst slapping my tush.... hmm.. quite the multi-tasker today i think... heh... btw..sliding on socks is highly under-rated... we should all do it.. its lovely.... maybe get some big pool noodles to bop eachother with as we go sliding by.... seems like a really fun night to me... bah.... anyway... im dead tired... i think i shall be going to bed....


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blah

05:47 Aug 16 2005
Times Read: 718


okie..well here i am after my first day ... and blah.. what a day.. in my public speaking class there are an assload of people... and the ex boyfriends of 2 of my friends... which just turns out lovely.... esp. since one of them decided to hit on me after class :l then.. this afternoon.. i heard more on my lawsuit... which is even more depressing.... hmm..ooooo.and i have about 4-5 hours of sleep before i have to get up for classes again..and im having some issues with people i know... blah.. i can't even get perky which is odd for me... guess im just sleepy


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22:13 Aug 14 2005
Times Read: 721


ok.. now that i have cooled down a bit.. im writing more.. because im bored and have nothing better to do with my time... or rather i should say.. don't feel like doing anything else.. so here i sit... oddly enough singing and dancing along to "let's get it on" probably shouldn't have mentioned that.. but oh well.. im really bored.. and no one is around... which is very good... hmm.. i've just had the wildest urge to go to the top of a very tall muddy hill.. hop on the air mattress and ride it down... maybe with a large feather... and pool noodle... .. yup... hmm.. wierd...


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frustrated and annoyed

19:40 Aug 14 2005
Times Read: 727


hmm, ok why do people have to beat around the bush about things?.. if someone is pissed at you, then wouldn't it just save alot of trouble to just come out and say what it is they are being such immature assholes about?... less that person is just an arrogant, narrowminded asshole who likes to be a dickhead for the sake of being a dickhead...which im sure many people do... but just for the record.. it gets old.. and there are much more important things that could be consuming my attention... so... for the record.. and im pretty sure you know who you are.... when your done being an ass let me know :)

now that that is out of the way.... heh.. i can vent yet some more... tomorrow i start my new classes.. one of them being a public speaking class which doesn't bode well for me.. considering i have panic attacks when forced to get in front of people....but is mandatory... so heh.. can't really do anything about that.. but how that pretains to my major of criminal psychology ill never know...

mom is home from the hospital now... she came home tuesday.. and its been pretty busy... its not like i don't like taking care of her.. i mean.. she is mom .. its just its so tiring....getting up during the night every 3 hours or so... cleaning up after that... moving her around... then my uncle walking throw... and instead of walking around the place im sleeping next to mom.. he steps on it.. which heh .. on an air mattress.. im finding is very startling... i mean one minute im laying there sleeping.. the next.. he steps on the mattress and i roll off the side.. heh.. those little buggers are odd like that... it sounds funny.. but getting bounced off or kicked gets really old.. and annoying when you haven't had much sleep to begin with.. .. i guess doing all of that with classes just makes things look pretty bleak right now...

that and we are staying at my grandparents..so they could help.. which i haven't seen much of lately.. but anyway.... that means i still have to go home and take care of the cats .... and shower and stuff.. so i stay on the move.... which is good i guess.. keeps things from getting too dull i suppose...

another thing im thinking about are my grandparents.. they pushed so hard for us to come over here... stay with them till mom got a little bit better... but now they are kinda acting like we are in the way.... and its really annoying... i mean... we didn't even want to come over here.. but .. i guess that doesn't matter...

more and more im finding that to get anywhere, you have to stand out and just say word for word what you want... because thats the only way things ever change.. even then its hard to get some place.. esp. in this family...no one seems to listen when i tell them what mom or i want...

i have it better than mom i suppose.. atleast i can leave and blow off some steam.. and she can't really.. less i wheel her out to the car and put her in.. which looks more and more inviting now that i think about it... heh.. anyway.. i guess i will close this for now... time to go do some physical therapy with mom....


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ick

04:36 Aug 12 2005
Times Read: 731


hmm ok.. well.. its been a while since i have said anything here.. and heh.. well i have alot to vent out..so.. lets see.. im going to start off with something thats particularly annoying me presently... stupid, big ole beef-headed men... like the kind that walk around with beer guys dangling over skin tight jeans... wearing shirts that just barely don't cover that beer gut... so you know when they lift their arms up, up comes the shirt and hello.. heh.. well lets just say its not pretty... getting back to the point..one of those such narrow-minded boobs has the gall to message me.. and ask me i will like peanut butter off of him... *hurls*... id sooner lick the bottem of my shoe than that.... ick!... hmm.. and now i have a very disturbing visual and have lost my zest for writing more... blah


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