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3 entries this month
14:25 May 27 2020
Times Read: 243
& I wonder if all mine
Think it sucks having to stay away from me
In the end.
As I do.
If only it could be less complicated
But I guess I make it that way
To test the bond.
Perhaps it's just me.
But ofcourse I want to refuse to think that.
They are true. Aren't they?
The rest is but lessons but perhaps I
Am the one not letting go completely.
In times of need I wish they were around and I lack them
Selfish. Then again they are free
I bow in my mistakes and see my flaws but is it enough
When only half of me want to change.
I like the game. The control. The love
For I am that sick in my mind however
My intentions is pure and I stop while the game is good
Another me realise all this and therefore know it's not right
But is that enough?
I am my own worst enemy.
I embrace the fact I am dark
I know I am light
I am alone by my own doing
I want them to come when I call
After an episode and I would totally
Do the same
But it's not healthy
Healthy for me, while knowing all my flaws and not being
Able to control them completely , is knowing I need help and
First thing to self help would be letting only people into my life
With knowledge of this and capabilities to handle it.
So I stay alone . Push people away.
Who could handle this lunatic?
I'm not even taking relationship I'm not
Looking for love.
I have few really good friends in my life
And even them I pushed away before.
Only they passed.
20:34 May 26 2020
Times Read: 260
I lost all value at last.
I guess what we had was not true.
If only I could turn back time
I still dream of you.
20:05 May 26 2020
Times Read: 270
What I require I can provide.
Read that again..
This is the way
22:42 - May 12 2021
If I am to chose between two evils, I chose the one that is more fun.
22:18 - May 12 2021
A new portal has open up for me....
19:29 - May 12 2021
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