The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

I just spent the past thirty minutes reading old journal entries of mine here, dating back to September-November of 2007. This is back when I was an au pair, living in Cork City, Ireland. And well... I guess I was just as miserable as I remember being during the time I was working there. For two years, that winter has been blocked out of my mind. The hopelessness, the homesickness, the isolation, and the desperation to get back home again. And tonight, it came to the surface again.



Sometimes, looking at these things only triggers terrible thoughts and emotions. Tonight, it triggered something else. I am grateful.



I am grateful that I made it back home again, grateful to have my family. Grateful for the job I have kept since my return.



Grateful for my closest friends...



Grateful to have met a man who has changed my entire life, and beyond grateful that he and his son have pre-prepared their family for me (who says it's always pre-made?).



I used to hate kids. They used to create this anger in me that was unimaginable... and now, I find myself loving them. And for the first time ever... I am in love. Twenty three years is a long time to go without such a feeling, but here it is. I love him. And I love the wonderful little package he comes with.



For once, I love my life.

Holy shit... I go off into the real world for five minutes (vastly under exaggerated), come back... and EVERYTHING has changed!



WHAT HAPPENED?!