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MissKara's Journal



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7 entries this month
 

The night.

00:21 Sep 19 2012
Times Read: 472


I just love the night in general. It really is my favorite time of day. It is always so calm and quiet, I am not trying to bash birds singing or anything, I know many people like that stuff, but I feel that during the day you can never be in complete silence. That is one of my favorite things about the night. Any time that I feel sad or angry or just thoughtful, I love to go lay outside on my porch and just stare up at the stars and the moon. It is really one of the only places I am totally at peace.


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Your Warmth.

00:16 Sep 19 2012
Times Read: 473


Distracted by what my body is telling me, I wait for your warmth

Unable to stop thinking, a craving, then a longing for your warmth

Touch me and let me have it, that feeling is worth saving

Hold me close so the warmness goes between us, yes your warmth

Take me as you will and spill all of your warmth upon me

I cuddle up to it, savoring the feel, your warmth makes love to me

Concentrating on every moment so as not to forget, it intensifies

Your warmth is devouring my body, wrapping itself around

Through and through your warmth builds up to spew

I take it in and wait again, for more of your warmth


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Waiting.

00:15 Sep 19 2012
Times Read: 474


Dear Future Lover





I am tired of being single and would want you in my life already. I don't ask for much. I just want you to be my best friend, to make me laugh when I'm crying. To realize that I am more fragile than I look, and to love me as much as I would love you. I want you to make me feel better during a bad day, to be there when I need to talk, and to know that you can always count on me because I'll be able to count on you. You should also know that I will be there for you too. I will make you laugh when you're down, I will support you and make you feel irreplaceable. You should also know that you have a place in my heart that no one, not even my next boyfriend (if he's not you) will have because only you can make me feel this alive.







-Waiting for you.


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Aching.

00:07 Sep 19 2012
Times Read: 477


*sigh* I need someone close. Not just like. . literally close to me, but emotionally close. Someone that I connect with. Someone that, no matter what happens, will love me at the end of the day. I need it.



See though. . . the only problem is is that I am sooo socially akward. No one at school talks to me really. The only people that I talk to, open up to, etc, are online. So, they are all oh so far away. I don't want that though. I am aching inside for someone to be close. For even one night. To listen to their heartbeat, to feel their breath against my neck. . . It's an ache that sometimes leaves me crying rivers. My family tells me to be more. . . social, less off putting, but it's hard. Everyone is so judgemental. . .



I do want you though. Yes, you. I am pretty positive that if you are reading this, you know who you are. I do. Even if for a night. Even if just a phone call. Listening to your breath, hearing your laugh. It makes me catch my breath.



Still though. . . I am left here with no one. It's depressing as ****. I have hardly anything to even bother with anymore. School. . . yep that's about the only thing I do in a day. I just I dunno. . . I'm lonely. I feel so empty all the time. I feel so. . . lost. I need someone. Someone that I doubt I will find.


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NO Cinderella here

23:57 Sep 18 2012
Times Read: 478


Most people might think that this means I have some sort of fairy tale idea of love. While I do believe that type of love exists...I do not think that my idea of a 'fairy tale' kind of love is really a typical , generalized thing.



I will clarify....



Romance, to me, comes in the little things. A small note, in the morning, left on the kitchen counter next to your coffee...A surprise hug from behind, when you are not aware they have walked into the room....A simple cuddle up on the couch movie night....or even a nap...yes, a nap...no hanky panky...just sleeping in each others arms...legs entwined.





Those things are romantic....to me.



I do not think that my knight in shining armor will come sweep me off my feet and rescue me from this dark life....noooo that is not reality. I do believe in love at first sight, I do believe that sometimes there are moments , you just cannot explain...sometimes, love and romance come from some unexpected place and sparks fly, and worlds collide and mushy mush butterfly sweet lovey dovey stuff happens!



But true romance is in those moments you share quietly with the one you love. simply making dinner together...walking hand in hand when running errands..playing with your children at the park together...



A look across the room into each others eyes when you are putting those children to sleep...a look you both know the meaning behind ...the knowing of thoughts without speaking....these are the things romance is born from...


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Life Isn't A Fairy Tale.

23:55 Sep 18 2012
Times Read: 479


I know for a fact that I am a romantic. Even thought I dont watch romantic movies for obvious reasons, but I know I would make the man I love feel loved and cared for. And I can only hope to be with the man who could make me feel the same. Sadly there arent that many romantic men here. And there arent that many left in the whole world. People are just full of stress, meanness, and hatred that they are not used to the beauty of romance.


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(RP)

01:38 Sep 18 2012
Times Read: 485


Kara was in the back of a truck with special Chains on her arms and legs. The chains kept her arms in close to her chest and looked black. Rose was being taken to her new Masters house in Budrio Italy. The man driving the truck was a large Rough man who looked like he could beat anyone even a demon to death. So it was wiser for Kara to not even try to get away. The man stopped at a house and then he went to the back. Along with the Chains Kara had a Collar and Leash on. The Man took her by the Leash and then he brought her up to the door. The man knocked on the door and in a harsh tone he said. "Slave Delivery!" He then waited for Loiuse to come and get Rose. Christian flinched as his front door was pounded upon, interrupting his train of thought at the moment. He hissed in displeasure and looked around himself for a clock. Just as he had suspected, his servants were taking their lunch break at the moment. He considered the option of just sitting there and waiting, but the inconvenience of being delayed the delivery of his slave was too much and in all honesty, he had nothing better to do. Christian let out a deep sigh to himself as he stood and took his time answering the door. He pushed the door open and shot an icy glare at the man. "Bring her in, if you will." Christian motioned him to step into the mansion. Had he any other option, he wouldn't have ever wanted such a dirty looking man such as himself in his presence let alone his home, but he couldn't know how to deal with a slave otherwise. Maybe the slave would be a fighter, which he knew he wouldn't be able to deal with.The man brought her in and then he Unlocked her chains. "There you go." He told him as he began to walk out the door. "he shouldn't fight you at all." He told him as he closed the door. Kara Looked around. She hadn't ever seen a house like this and she had been living in Heaven for the longest amount of time. "I uhmm.. H-Hi I'm Kara Minx." She said as she looked down at the collar and leash that was still on her. That made her more like a pet then a person, and the Collar and Leash still limited her Angelic spells that she could cast. Christian took a moment to look the girl over. She was cute, he supposed, but it wasn't really much of a good thing to Christian either. In fact, it bothered him. "You shouldn't speak so informally with your master like that," Christian snapped, "You should consider yourself lucky you have me as a master and not some random man who'd put you to work in his fields then have his way with you." he laughed a bit internally at the thought. Such sick and twisted things entertained him, maybe it wouldn't be such a bad idea to put this girl to work in the fields. However, this wasn't at all what he had planned when he purchased her."My name is Christian Dever and from today onwards, you will call me nothing other than 'Master', do you understand?" Christian cupped the girl's face with his hand, turning it from one side to the other, closely examining her face. This girl was cuter than Christian had originally thought. Her skin was rather soft against the palm of his hand as well. He rather enjoyed the feeling against his skin. Christian withdrew his hand and turned, not waiting for a response. "Follow me, I'll show you to your room." He began walking up stairs, not bothering to check if the girl was following. If she didn't, she would have no where to go and no one to feed her. This thought also entertained Christian. Kara followed him up to her door and when it was opened her eyes widened. This room had far outstretched her standards for what she was expecting. She was expecting a room with a hard bed no pillows and a small desk like a jail cell. She looked around while Christian spoke of the meals that she was to have an about the house rules for her. Then the next few words that Christian said caught her by surprise. 'Entertain him? H-How can I do that?' She thought as she turned to look at her Master. "Well Master how can I entertain you?" She asked him. She was hoping that he could tell her cause she personally had no clue of what she was supposed to do at the moment.. Christian furrowed his brow, "However you wish to entertain me of course." He was being purposefully vague with his answer. Honestly, he really did want a reason to scold the girl. To watch her squirm in discomfort, desperately trying to come up with something. Christian would enjoy the sight very much. The girl's confusion almost made him smile, it was quite cute, he had to admit. Before long though, Christian had come up with a much better idea.

"Act like a dog." He said with childish excitement. His expression had instantly changed from cold to expecting. Christian looked forward to this. He had never been able to do this kind of thing, despite wanting to since childhood, with his sadistic nature. Kara was still confused because of how Vague that her master was being. She didn't realize that he was doing that on purpose so he tried to think of something. She almost had something until Christian said 'Act Like a Dog.' She looked at him and then she looked down at the ground. "Y-Yes Master." She said as she got down on all fours. She began to bark like a dog and walk around a little. 'This is embarrassing.' She thought as a blush began to creep across her face. She looked at her master. "May I please stop now Master" She asked him. Christian watched as the girl did as she was told, holding in any comment. He was a bit bothered that his servant would stop without his ok but he would let it slide this time. "Do as you wish, I suppose." He let out a faked disappointed sigh. Honestly, he had found the action more than suitable enough for his request, but he would never admit such a thing. Never.



Christian had never been the type to give anyone credit. Ever since childhood, someone could offer their entire life to him and he would place no value upon it. People had done similar since he was small so, in his defense, how could he? His own emotions never seemed to impact whether or not a person would decide to be around him so he hadn't a reason to go out of his way to be nice either. Such would only be a waste of his own energy. All this girl had done was get on the floor for him and many had done similar for him before but for some reason this time, it was funnier. It seemed much more out of place. I wonder how she was brought into slavery... Christian found himself wondering. However, he soon rid himself of the thought. Kara saw the disappointed sigh and she decided just this once she would have just a little more fun with this dog thing. She crawled over to her master and then she sat like a dog in front of him. She barked a sheepish bark and then she stuck her tongue out in a panting motion like a dog did. She was starting to lose a little bit of her embarrassment from earlier. Right now she was doing what she pleased she was trying to make someone who seemed cold hearted laugh. After all he was an Angel so why not try to get him to at least laugh a little, or give a smile. "Does master want to play?" She asked him. Giving a kind of cute dog tone to her voice. Christian stared for a moment at the dog girl in front of him, slowly taking things in, before finally letting a smile form on his face. He gently set his hand on the girl's head and pet her, "You're quite the odd one, now aren't you?" He moved his hand and lightly placed his palm against Kara's cheek. "It's too early for 'play', though," Christian joked, wondering if the girl would understand the joke. He curiously took a hold of the leash, looking it over in his hand. No matter how you looked at it, it really was a leash and collar. Maybe being a dog suited her that well."This collar," he began with same cold, unconcerned voice, "Why do you slaves have it?" Christian never broke his gaze from the leash. He truly didn't want to see the look in Kara's eyes if she stuck a soft spot. "It doesn't seem like it'd be very effective in keeping you in line," he tugged a bit on the leash, but still found nothing special about it. Some would think that he was concerned with human rights or something of the sort but that really wasn't it. Christian could care less for others, but the functionality of a collar and leash was rather questionable. Yet, it had to have served some purpose. Even Christian with his sadistic tendencies would never have resorted to put collars and leashes on people. Though looking back, he wondered why he had never tried. He looked at her with a bit of a smile when he pet her head, but then he felt a bit strange when he put her hand on her cheek. 'Its too early for 'play.' he thought. That's what she was just told and being an angel she didn't really get the joke that much. Then her attention turned to the Leash and collar that was around her neck. Her master was curious why it was on her and well Kara knew the only two reasons why it was there. "Well the first reason is because you own me so it shows that I'm a slave, and the second Reason that I have it is to limit my powers." She said. She didn't think that her master would care all too much about her Race or her power so she didn't think that she needed to Elaborate any further on it. "Powers..." Christian mumbled to himself then smirked. I suppose that they would need something to keep themselves sane, even if it is lies. He decided to let it slide. "Well, is there any way I could get one a little less..." he had a million negative words to describe it but settled on, "Worn?" Christian let go of the leash with that and wiped his hand off on the bed in hopes that he could get rid of the dirt that had attached to his hand. Now that he thought of it, the girl herself had quite a bit of dirt packed on her. Christian hissed in slight disgust. "And when was the last time you bathed, out of curiosity?" He quickly swept his legs to the side and stood, trying not to be too close to Kara. He looked around for anything that he might use to hold onto the girl without ever actually touching her but failed to locate anything. With a defeated sigh, Christian just took a few steps back and hoped that she'd be ok. She looked up at her Master and then she realized that she was very dirty because they never let her bathe while she was at the Market place. She had also noticed that the collar was very worn because it was pretty old. "Well I haven't taken a bath ever since I was captured and the only way to get me a new collar is to take the Gem off and put it on the new one I can't take it off but you can." She said when she got to the part about the gem she lifted her hand up and she tried to touch the yellow gem it shocked her with black electricity. That's what it did to her whenever she tried to touch it so she was pretty used to it. "I'm very sorry Master." She told him. Christian felt his eye twitch a bit from complete disgust at the thought that he had touched someone who hadn't bathed in God knows how long. "You're bathing, now. Right now. N.O.W." he grabbed hold of the leash and dragged the girl without any care whether she would walk or not. His only worry at the moment was how dirty his floor was probably getting because of this girl. Christian led her down the hall and into a room that was almost completely empty, besides for a large water basin and a few towels and buckets."Strip while I go find a servant to bring some water and soap. We'll worry about your collar later." He quickly excused himself from the room and rushed down the stairs, looking around for a clock. When one was found, he concluded he actually had another ten or so minutes before his servants would be off break. Christian considered his options. he could draw the water himself and be ever so kind enough to bring it up stairs as well, or he could wait for his servants and his slave could catch a cold. he chose the latter and found himself a nice chair to sit down in until their break would be through. She felt herself being dragged out of the room by her leash which hadn't been used by anyone but her master. She walked with him and when they got to the bathroom she walked in. Then she heard what Christian had said and just like that Christian was out of the bathroom type room. She took off her clothing and then she sat down and she waited for the servent to get there. "I wonder when they'll get here." She said to herself as she hoped that they would hurry because it was kinda cold in here and she didn't have anything on. While she was in there she whistled to keep herself occupied until the person got in there with the water. Finally, when one of his servants walked in, Christian called out to them, "Good, you're back. Fetch some water for me." They let out a deep sigh, "How much water do you need, Sir?" Christian pondered this for a second. Kara was rather dirty. "Enough for two bathes," he concluded. The servant could only nod and go out to retrieve it. Christian took his time returning up stairs, examining the pictures that hung on the walls of the hallway. Pictures of his father, mother and other people whom he couldn't even identify for the life of him. It felt a bit lonely with these. It wasn't like he knew most of his relatives in the first place. Even his and her immediate family weren't close, let alone some distant aunt or uncle. he finally reached the room and opened the door without warning. he didn't really care much that the girl was nude. he somewhat enjoyed the sight, but his cold personality wouldn't allow him to admit such things. "The servant is on his way with the water." Christian stated quickly. Kara was sitting there just waiting for someone to get up there and get her the water so that she could take a bath. She was debating on whether or not she was going to look out the door and check and see if someone was in there when Christian walked in. She jumped when he came in without warning and she tried to cover herself, but it was very difficult for her. When she heard what Christian said she nodded. "Ok." She told him as she waited for Christian to leave.


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