The essence of Lonerism is the hatred of the superficial and the longing for the deep and
Superficial; shallow, skin-deep, cosmetic, empty, meaningless, without substance,
insubstantial, insignificant, unimportant, trifling, trivial, petty, frivolous. All these words
proclaim what a loner hates in every area of his or her life.
Profound; intense, extreme, poignant, penetrating, cutting, deep-felt, heartfelt, heartmoving, heart-rendering, heart-breaking, soul-stirring, overpowering, overwhelming,
overcoming, difficult, hard, tough, involved, complicated, perplexing. All words to
describe the longings of every loners heart.
Wise, sage, scholarly, intellectual, learned, erudite, informed, well-read, well-versed, wellposted, knowledgeable, knowing, gnostic, comprehensive, encyclopedic, philosophical,
thoughtful, reflective, empathetic, compassionate. All words that could be used to describe a loner.
Loners are those looking for the deep and profound in every area of life.
Nature. Loners like to experience nature in its most natural and untamed form. They love
hiking, wilderness, roughing it, solitude, the beauty of nature untouched by human hand.
They desire to experience nature in its most purest form, become as close to one with it as
possible. They love challenging themselves physically in the wild places as a way of feeling
the very essence of their physicality through exercise and hard work.
Reading. Loners are not into mysteries, romances, the latest self-help craze, dieting books or cooking books. Loners love literature, books that have stood the test of time that touch on truly human qualities that reach past generations. They love books about man’s
struggles with nature, conscience, societal failures of poverty, violence, war, inequality
and self hatred. Books for loners can be life changing because they take them to deeper
relationships with themselves and the world.
Creativity. Loners are creative in that they are not afraid to gage the depths of their own
souls, to see and expose their own horror, joys and failures in poetry, essays, novels,
painting, music and sculptures. A loner removes the masks that hide us from the world and
exposes us to the real. Loners as artists that peel back the fake to reveal what lies hidden
below, not only from the world but from ourselves. Art then becomes a form of
confession, and confession a form of art.
Fellowship. Loners are not without friends, only without acquaintances. They long for
and are recharged by deep meaningful relationships, while drained by casual, superficial
ones. Loners long to express their feelings through their art, through meaningful
conversation and shun the trivial talk of weather and who is doing what with whom.
Religion. Loners are religious fanatics. They are the ones that leave all to pursue works ofcharity. They believe that anything if it is to be done, must be done to the absolute fullest.
They seek deep meaningful relationships with their God, they are not the cattle of the
congregation, they are the herders and forerunners, the desert prophets of religion. They are loners in that Jesus said few would find the way, but wide is the way of destruction.
Christianity is not a religion of the masses it is a religion of the few. Jesus said, “Many will
come to me saying Lord, Lord.” But Jesus said his response will be, “depart from me I
never knew you.” It is a fanaticism of love and complete sacrifice, not of hatred and
violence. Love. Loners are intense lovers. They have a deep need to be known and to know another person on every level; emotionally, spiritually, intellectually and physically. When one of these areas is missing the relationship for a loner is unfulfilling. Loners can be drawn to
unbridled sex in its illusion of complete openness, but they are never satisfied because it does not speak to their real desire for deep relationships on every level.
TV. TV is an anathema to true loners, with its putrid stream of superficiality; talk shows,
sitcoms, pedantic dramas, opinion poll driven news with arguments that would rival any
dysfunctional family’s conversation around a dinner table, all to be repeated the next week
ad nauseam. News is always the same, all you have to do is change the names. TV’s new
low is the re-victimization of families which have lost love ones to horrific crimes by
entertaining us with forensic science and police investigative work. So boring is TV’s
content the only choice was to turn the camera on the audience. Loners could careless
who said what about who and who is stabbing who in the back to win a million dollars. It
is the ultimate in superficiality to sit and watch the average and below average lives of
others through a TV screen. Nonloners believe friendships can be had over the waves, like
“Friends” and “Cheers” were everybody knows your name, friendships that are so shallow
all you have to do is sit in on your couch and watch.
Advertising. Advertising by definition is to the masses which makes it unbearable for a
loner to watch. Advertising is the corporations attempt to kill the individual for group
think, trend setters, people pleasing masses that must follow their lead to be accepted in
this world. Even in its infinite choices it kills individualism. Individuals can only be
individuals by rejecting the infinite choices. Isn’t one color key chain, tooth brush, guitar
pick, rubber band, razor, paper clip sufficient? Isn’t one ply, two ply, ultra soft, ultra
moist, ultra wide, ultra long, enough choices for toilet paper? Advertising along with TV
has become the tranquilizer of the masses who refuse to think, to feel, to empathize, to
show charity, to love, to hate, to exist, letting the massive companies think for us now, to
define our values, tell us what is in and what is out. Loners would rather spend time
thinking about the poor, the starving, the widows, the orphans, the drug attics, the
alcoholics, and all their children instead of how many ply toilet paper we are going to use
or the color of our tooth brush as a form of acceptance into the human race? If only there
was money to be made in one thousand and one ways to help a drug addict reclaim his or
her life. If only a fraction of the time spent on thinking about how to sell another razor
with ten heads, instead of nine, was focused on providing for children’s emotion, spiritual
and physical needs what would this world look like. If only there were an infinite number
of features that could be added on to the most mundane form of charity we could change
the world with advertising.
Boredom. A loner is rarely if ever bored. Loners are capable of entertaining themselves
with their own thoughts and ruminations. The mundane for a loner is a place of peace, a
time to dreg the depths of their soul and appreciate the little things in life and the beauty of nature. The only time a loner is bored is when they have to listen to the uninteresting
drivel of normal nonloner conversation. Not to be condescending, but how many times
and ways can you say the weather is nice today. And what is even worse is how many
times and ways can you say it when you know the person you are talking to is tortured by
life’s misfortunes, or deeply hurting because of devastating loneliness, or who’s heart has
been shattered by life’s roughshod treatment of the meek and lowly. Have we become so
shallow in our thinking and so self centered that time now is wasted if we are not
entertained on a constant basis? Are there so few acts of charity and people who need
them that a moment of reflection has no one to be reflect on? Boredom then must occur
then when the shallowness of our thought is revealed and therefore the depts. of our love
and compassion are also revealed. When you cannot think of a single thing to inspire your
soul in a moment of inactivity how shallow have we become?
Appearance. Loners are not followers of the latest fashion trends. They either stand out
as ridiculously unfashionable or they blend in, with the simplicity of their appearance.
When they stand out it is not for attention as most, but rather because they like it and
don’t care what other people think. Ironically they often are the fashion trend setters. But
they are the original, not those that copy them for acceptance sake, coming to the point
that the different becomes the norm. Loner’s self exploration and intimate acceptance of
themselves allows them to be different, or alternatively to blend into society, not needing
to call attention to themselves for their self-worth. Like being alone loners are not afraid
to be with themselves and accept themselves. Nonloners must constantly be with people
for self ameliorating reasons, constantly dressing and rehearsing their parts to be accepted
and built up by others because deep down they don’t know who they are.
Depression. Loners can be given to melancholy. Their lives are always fighting the trends.
They are keenly aware of the suffering and tragedies of life. Their desire to go deep into
themselves and others, has made them susceptible to what most simply push out of their
mind with the sedative of consumerism and entertainment. They also fight the people
pleasing dialogs that have been shoved into their brains from birth, the call to be accepted
by the many to be of value. Some can’t eat a meal and not contemplate the many that go
without. Some can’t look at a checkout clerk in a convenience store and not wonder about
their lives, their tragedies, their hopes and dreams. Some can’t buy extravagant things
without thinking how the money could have been used to feed a starving child or provided
shelter from a cold rain that penetrates their very soul. Nonloners see all this melancholy
as tragic, and try to comfort loners. But loners are not afraid of melancholy like nonloners.
They know when melancholy sets in they are living, that they have awaken from their
death bed to experience the world as it is. All this awareness of the world loners know
starts within and moves to the outside, something nonloners don’t understand and try tocure with antidepressants and sleeping pills. If antidepressants were seen as the cure for
loner melancholy there would be no Psalms, no art, no literature, no voice. You could
cure all compassion, all empathy, all good works with the flush of a pill down the throat of
humanity while lining the pockets of drug companies that push them like candy. Drug
companies and their hired hit men, doctors, have made melancholy the leprosy of today.
To be melancholy is to have a dreaded disease that must be gotten rid of at all coast.
Addictions. Loners are prone to addictions. It is paradoxical that a loner would be prone
to addictions, but the intensity of living in the real instead of the fake can drive one to seek
escape. But loners usually don’t seek the mild sedative of entertainment. Their escape
must be as hard and nasty as the world they see all around them. They seek the self
destructive avenues of drugs and alcohol. It is a private way of punishing themselves for
their inability to meet the needs of the world, to face them and not flinch. Addiction is a
way of killing the pain of never really being known, and never really knowing, two things
they long for with every fiber of their being. Loners when it gets right down to it must
seek a God of forgiveness. When a loner truly sees himself and the world around him the
only escape is through forgiveness, forgiveness of the world and forgiveness of
themselves. Without a forgiving God who empowers loners, simply by His offer of
forgiveness, loners would be trapped in their self destruction. It truly becomes the only
means of escape.
Sex. Sex is often an illusion for loners. It is to be the ultimate in a deep relationship, but
often is hollow because it comes first not last. Without an intimate relationship of mind,
soul and spirit sex is only the illusion of oneness. Pornography is the quintessential
example. It gives the illusion of a deep relationship in its complete openness of the body, but without an openness of the soul, heart and spirit it leaves one empty, never satisfied.
Sex is the culmination of union of soul, heart and spirit and for those loners that have seen
through the illusions of the sex revolution, sex is the ultimate in union and nonsuperficiality. It can only be experienced in all its glory when a relationship of trust has been developed that is so great all things of mind, spirit, soul and body can been laid bare.
Hypocrisy. Loners are hypocrites in that they often do not live up to the standards they
value. They however are not hypocrites in the sense that they claim to be something they
are not. They are painfully honest about their faults and the faults of others. They have
unlivable standards and therefore are hypocrites by necessity, but never by word of false
aggrandizing. Honesty for them is the only way to deep relationships, therefore they seek
the good as well as the evil in themselves and the world, admitting their faults but desiring
to be different. Loners then are the most lovable of all hypocrites, allowing others to admit
to their own hypocrisies
Government. Loners are skeptical of government. They see it as the protector of the
masses, the persecutor of the loner. They see government as a brainwashing organization
that will maintain the status quo at all cost, and silence any free thinker that questions the
status quo. Loners do not look to government for solutions, but to individual responsibility. It is the person that knows themselves and the world that can free the worldfrom the tyranny of poverty, corruption, self aggrandizing, pettiness and the self indulgence of the powerful. Governments can turn their guns on its citizens as easily as on its enemies, something loners know because they are students of history while nonloners contemplate what color of tooth brush to buy.
Spare Time. All time is spare time for loners. Loners are often seen as lazy, selfish
people. Time spent writing, thinking, painting, composing music is selfish time. Time
listening to a friends’ problems is wasted time for a nonloner, unless there is some
entertainment value to it, some self gratification that can be gotten from it. Why don’t you
get a full time job, make something useful nonloners say, like a pink tooth brush or a
purple hula hoop. Time thinking and writing, time being creative is selfish time, time that
for all intents and purposes is wasted time to a nonloner. But what differences in this
world have pink tooth brushes made in comparison to great books, or works of art, or
quite times of just listening to a friends struggles? Spare time is time open for God’s
leading, not wasted time.
Copout. Loners sometimes consciously or unconsciously take on way to much. They try
and bear the burdens of people that are way beyond their capability. In doing so they can
express their compassion, their indignation, but at the same time walk away from the
situation because it is too big to handle. Loners are naturally uncomfortable with groups,
but when it comes to helping even single individuals, groups are often the only means to
help. I call this a copout because feeling compassion or indignation for a soul and actually
doing something about it must go hand in hand, and that most likely will mean working
with groups. Don’t pick a problem to tackle, that your heart leads you to do something
about and then use the copout it is to big for me. Yes it probably is, but don’t stop, find
people of like minds to help you and only bite off as much as you can chew. Don’t use the
copout it is to big a problem for me.
Entrepreneur. Business is almost always death to a loner. Running your own business
means having all that time you used to think profound thoughts now consumed with
thoughts of how you are going to pay your bills, your employees, what inventory are you
going to order, how are you going to promote it ad nauseam. It can be the death of the
spirit of a loner. However if the business is successful enough to supply you with an
income, and you still have a soul when it is over, and the business can run itself, (a lot of
ands in here) it can be a great asset to a loner. Free him or her to spend more time mining
their soul and the soul of the world. Some entrepreneurs like writings, nature
photographers, those that can work from home on their computers can find their salvation
in being an entrepreneur. It means not having to be crammed in a small office with a bunch
of chatty nonloners that don‘t have the slightest idea what ruminate means.
Self-righteous. Ah, young immature loners are the epitome of self-righteousness. They
have looked out over the world, penetrating its superficiality, and honed in their wrath on
all those that cause mayhem in our society, or seem not to notice. Loners believe
themselves to be the voice of the voiceless and often preach from their own self made
pulpits against the hypocrisy of the righteous, against the shallowness of the average Joe
and Jane. But as maturity sets-in and their thoughts turn inward their shrill condemnation
is muted. They begin to realize they are a part of the problem as well as an enlightener.
Idealism is muted with the reality of our own selfishness, our own ways of coping-out on
what needs to be done. In the book of James it says show me your faith without works
and I will show you my faith by my works. Mature loners do not need others to credit
their righteousness as such, they only need to do what needs to be done for the simple
sake, it needs to be done. True knowledge of self, deep knowledge of self comes not with
our words, but with our actions. You show me a man who simply talks about the
injustices of the world and I will show you a self-righteous man. And these come in the
secular and religious form. You show me a man that does something about it and I will
show you a humble man that knows himself deeply.
Mental Illness. I have read somewhere that mental illness is like a negative feed back
loop. You think people are after you and then every where you look you see people
looking at you and talking and assume they are talking about you--reinforcing your
original feelings. Loners I think are prone to this type of mental illness. They sometimes
go into themselves so far that their thoughts become reality, coloring it to the point of the
unreal. Loners need friends that can break the loop, trusted friends that can at times pull
them out of destructive thoughts and make them see what is real as apposed to what is
imagined. Sometime loners can become so attached to what is bad about themselves that
they sabotage all their relationships. Seeing rejection at every turn they go even deeper
into their self destructive thoughts. Any rejection becomes fuel to feed the fire of the
negative feed back loop causing behavior and thoughts that just exacerbates the problem.
Or they can become so world hating that all they see is that which reinforces those feelings
driving them deeper into their insanity. But don’t mistake melancholy for mental illness.
Melancholy is a natural reaction to the real. I would say a person that looks deeply at
themselves and the world and is not depressed could be considered the one who is ill.
Chores. Loners are dreadful at daily chores. Paying bills, grocery shopping, mowing the
yard etc. are considered by loners as black holes, sucking the very life out of them. Loners
don’t like to do anything that would be considered maintenance of their existence or the
existence of their property. These things are considered a huge waste of time, they are the
most superficial of things doing nothing to contribute to their deep thought life or
relationships. A loner who has found someone to do these tasks for them should be
profoundly grateful. Loners will often procrastinate anything even remotely associated
with a chore because they receive absolutely nothing in return from them, accept maybe
some peace from a nagging spouse.
Reflection. Reflection on nature, the scriptures, life is a way to receive directly from God
truth. Nonloners however choose either of two options; they either believe everything or
they believe nothing.