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xXAvaXx's Journal


xXAvaXx's Journal

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4 entries this month
 

So happy! But also, does anyone else feel this way?

15:57 Sep 15 2021
Times Read: 29







I couldn't be more happy these days. I love my life, I love my family, my friends, everything :). Not to brag though, It's more that....I wasn't happy for such a long time. It took me years to achieve this level of happiness and I truly hope everyone does too.

In other news, does anyone else wonder way so many people expect you to just....deal with their attitude or how they act? Like, do you know someone who is totally rude and cracks "jokes" only they aren't funny and are just, well rude? Then when you call them out on it, they get offended and defensive and say you are the toxic person? Manipulation at its finest. Sometimes they will even blame it on their "trauma" or the way they grew up and it's like....and? I have more trauma than most people I know...I would never treat someone badly, let alone blame my past for it. Like okay so you have trauma where someone or something did something bad to you, so now instead of using that as a catalyst to be kind and spread goodness, you use it to be rude, mean, and manipulative to others? How does that work lol. You have a choice, everyone has a choice.

I guess this kind of turn into a rant lol. I apologize.


COMMENTS

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A moment for you...

00:55 Sep 08 2021
Times Read: 67







Following my last entry, I actually would like to take a moment to thank....you. Yes you, the reader. Most of my entries tend to surround one person in particular, however I have met so many of you here. So many kind and caring people and I feel as though I haven't given you justice. I want to personally thank you all, even if we don't talk, even if only one message has ever been exchanged....thank you.


COMMENTS

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immorteb
immorteb
15:10 Sep 08 2021

*hugs*





xXAvaXx
xXAvaXx
16:37 Sep 08 2021

Aww *hugs* :)





 

Finally free....

00:17 Sep 08 2021
Times Read: 74







Maybe I was wrong...about this insatiable bond I felt....because now...I feel free. The pain, hurt, and worry I felt for not having this person in my life is gone. Though apart of me will always wish things had turned out different....I no longer feel the guilt for not being able to show him what could have been and I no longer dread on knowing he didn't feel the same connection that I did.

In short...I feel free. I am so happy for everything in my life and now I can shine bigger and brighter than ever before.


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Why?

00:02 Sep 04 2021
Times Read: 113








You ever miss someone you barely know....But feel like they should be in your life somehow?

Maybe it's even someone who isn't exactly...good for you? Someone who maybe doesn't even care about you as much as you care about them. But for some mysterious reason something in your heart...no...your soul, tells you they need to be in your life. That's me right now, I don't know why I can't let this go....


COMMENTS

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VvBleedForMevV
VvBleedForMevV
00:20 Sep 04 2021

Yep *sighs*








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