The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

The movement of attraction is just a bit confusing

You never know whats going to happen

Most of the time you don’t want to know

Or if you should question it

But the days move forward

And each day you get older and older

You see things you’ve never seen before

Things that half the time you didn’t want to know

But the problems still arise

Even when you try changing what is wrong

You learn that life is not easy

And never will be

Nothing you do will ever make it completely easy



Doing the right things can help

But it won’t make everything better



Not everything your told is the truth

Even if you want it to be

You just have to let things fall into place

And hope that everything will be okay

Even if it turns out to be false



The people you love move on

Whether you want them to or not

Theres nothing you can do to change it

Its just a part fo life

Anger, rage, darken skys

I want this pain to be ended

But will it ever or do I really have to die for that

I am not afriad of death never have been and I never will be

It will be an extremely happy day when the pain finally ends



But will it ever

I fucking hope so



I want it to I want my love back

But will he ever come back

This I truely don’t know



All I can do is hope

The warmth your eyes bring to my heart

Is the greatest feeling in my world

How you use to look in my eyes

Still makes my heart flutter



Your sweet taste... smell...

The way you’d touch me so gently

The way you held me

Holds my heart



You are my one and only

I’ll never feel the way I do for anyone but you!

I love you so much

I will forever and always be yours!

I am truely sorry!

As it starts to rain you look to my face

For a sign of life or emotion,

but you will never understand me

and my issues for they don't live in your world.

Maybe one day I'll make you understand,

or maybe one day I'll go through with my plans,

Hopefully you won't leave before I get

the chance to explian to you why I love you



I fear the day that you leave

and it makes me think back to memories long.

So attached, I don't want to pain you,

afriad to hurt you and have you leave.

I fear the day that you leave

and it makes me think back to memories long.

So attached, I don't want to pain you,

afriad to hurt you and have you leave.



I am not to be trusted

I don't really care what happens

Maybe sometimes I think of all the stupid things I've done

but I don't regret any of it

All I care about is your attention

Still frightened to get to involved



Rain continues to pour down upon my face

I look up to you, see my mistakes in your face,

and I ask myself why, why did I do this to you

I'm now commited to every image, every scene,

to your scent, taste, the way you hold me,

I remember every moment, every feeling I get when I'm with you,

but is this really what I want



I fear the day that you leave

and it makes me think back to memories long.

So attached, I don't want to pain you,

afraid to hurt you and have you leave.



I am not to be trusted.

I don't really care what happens.

Maybe sometimes I think of all the stupid things I've done.



I fear the day that you leave

and it makes me think back to memories long.

So attached, I don't want to pain you,

afriad to hurt you and have you leave.



I don't regret any of it

All I care about is your attention

still frightened to get to involved

Best friends to the end was what we said

but its changed over time

we were once so close and now were lost forever

I can never understand what happened

nor do I want to

The way we acted was inapporiate

we went from loving to hating



Its surprising how one person can change your life

how it can ruin or build a relationship

we can look back and try to find what we once had

or we can rebuild a new relationship



A lot has changed and I haven't seen you for a while

some have changed for the worst and others for the best,

but in other ways it will never matter

what we once had is destoryed

I missed you and I'll always love you

but that will never change anything that happened

what we had is gone and truthfully I wan it to stay this way



Its surprising how one person can change your life

how it can ruin or build a relationship

we can look back and try to find what we once had

or we can rebuild a new relationship



I still ask myself why we can't get our friendship back together

I really wish that we could have our friendship back

I don't want it to be like what it was

Only the friendship

Some things will never change, but at least we could try



Its surprising how one person can change your life

how it can ruin or build a relationship

we can look back and try to find what we once had

or we can rebuild a new relationship



Its surprising how one person can change your life

how it can ruin or build a relationship

we can look back and try to find what we once had

or we can rebuild a new relationship

Everyday something new to add to this addiction,

when will this shit end,

when will all this shit put an end to my life,

the addiction gets harder and harder to get past,

when your body needs the feeling, the taste!



How much am I willing to risk for this life,

Do I really want it that badly,

that I'd give up my life

I don't really want to think about it



I've lived a chemical life for to long

when will this all end

How long am I expected to survive

this treachrous life ( all that I hate )

to much time and sorrow

to put this brhind me



How much am I willing to risk for this life,

Do I really want it that badly,

that I'd give up my life

I don't really want to think about it



All the secrets and denial

When will it all end

All I want is for it to be all over

Or for my life to be free from all of this

I want my freedom, but it doesn't seem to happen that way



How much am I willing to risk for this life,

Do I really want it that badly,

that I'd give up my life

I don't really want to think about it

Lights surround me as everything flys by me at speeds I can't understand.

The fear of letting go and having endless boring days that mean absolutely nothing to me come across my mind.

What would I do if out of no where I lost everyone dear and close to me?

I simply wouldn't be able to handle it.

It would just kill me.

It'd be like the old days when I relied on drugs.

I'm not exactly sure if I'd go back to my old habits, but either way it wouldn't be good.

In the end I'd end up being the emotionless person I use to be and I really wouldn't like that.

I'd have to start over with everything once again.

It'd be a fucked up scenario and people would end up seeing me back at my worst and I really don't want that.

If the ones that know me knew everything about me there'd be no way that they'd still be talking to me.

But if they knew me for who I am today maybe they wouldn't care about the things I did in my past.

All the things you told me,

left long ago,

I never listened then,

What makes you think I'll listen now

Your words are useless to me.



I don't want your hypocritical thinking around,

How hard is that to understand

Get the fuck away from me, you fucked up

version of the human race



I tell you time and time agian,

I fucking hate you and I never want to see you ever agian,

but still you keep coming back for more,

trying so hard to be something that your not,

just so I'll be your friend



Remembering once that you told me

you'd never change for anyone,

so why change for me,

I'm not the one for you,

when will you get that though your fucking head



I don't want your hypocritical thinking around,

How hard is that to understand

Get the fuck away from me,

You fucked up version of the human race

You told me you loved me, you fucked with my mind,

I believed it and you betrayed me,

I was your best friend and thought that

I could trust you,

But you still fucked with me again,

That was in the olden days, when I was naive

and now I've learned from my mistakes

and I'm not going too believe that shit anymore

I won't be naive any longer

I've changed



I've learned that nobady is to be trusted at first sight

That they must show me what they really want from me

To know that I'm not being used as a toy for what they want



I want to trust you, but I can't

I want to know you, but you won't let me close

what goes thourgh your mind, I wish I knew

You lie to me time and time again and you wonder

why I don't love you!



What you told me was all lies

Just so that you could get what you wanted from me

I won't be fouled by you any longer

I've grown up since you last saw me

Let's just put it this way

You want something you can't have

And you'll never have it again



I'velearned that nobady is to be trusted at first sight

That they must show me what they really want from me

To know that I'm not being used as a toy for what they want



I want to trust you, but I can't

I want to know you, but you won't let me close

what goes on in your mind, I wish I knew

You lie to me time and again and you wonder

why I don't love you!

Screams in my head, no more reasons for me to go ,everyone pushes me one way, then pulling me the other,

not to much fun there

been abused most my life, been kicked around and

punished for things I never did,

to much there (can't take this life much life much longer)

beed around drugs most of my life, done drugs (what's new with that)



People not understand how I feel and whats

going on (on the inside)

not knowing what is truth from false

My mind is spinning from to many thoughts at one time

make it stop I just want it to stop



I've lived in so many different ways

Moving around like a stray cat

Been screaming for help from someone

I've been trying to find bright stop in a dull area

hoping to find a reason to continue living

Why shouldn't I kill myself, would it ne easier

No, its just worthless



People not understanding how I feel and whats

going on (on the inside)

not knowing what is truth from false

my mind is spinning from to many thoughts at one time

make it stop I just want it to stop



Fucked up people not being truthful

Using me for the time being until I break

until I fall intoa deep black hole and lose myself

to their hatred, its not going to happen

You can go FUCK OFF!!

The anger you start

doesn't seem to be enough

You just like to put people in pain

You've hurt me so

much in the past

that I can't stand it...

DON'T YOU SEE



You've put me through so much,

That I can't even breath,

I can't just hold all this shit inside of me,

Do you understand me like you say you do?,

I don't think you do!,

If you did you wouldn't put me

throught all this pain,

If you understood how I feel inside

How much I

hurt, cry, hate

all the anger, all the cuts,

maybe you'd stop then



All this doesn't seem

to be emough for

you, all you want is

to hurt the people

around you,

you don't see!...



How much damage your doing its not enough

that you hurt the people

around you, but you don't seem to see

How much we

all hurt, cry, hate

all the shit we go through

the problems going on with

you happen to us all...

Your not the only one!

Fuck this place

I need help finding the real me

This world cannot stand me any longer

This damn world is bring me down

Into a deep dark hole that I really don't want to be in



It's getting worst and it's just hurting me even more

No one to help me any longer

It's getting worst and it's just hurting me even more

No one to help me any longer



This world cannot take my life any longer

I will be taking control of every move from you

Your just bringing me down

Into what you call your home



Your just getting so old

I cannot stand you're feed back

Your just getting so old

I cannot stand you're feed back



It's getting old, but you keep coming back to me

I can't believe that you are so stupid that

You would take me as a fool



It's getting worst and its just hurting me even more

No one to help me any longer

Your just getting so old

I cannot stand you're feed back

It's getting worst and it's just hurting me even more

Crashing tides

engulfing everything in sight

must everything disappear in time

fading away as if it was never there



everything has an end

death is inescapable

will you surcome to the fear

I will not

all accepting



the new likr a breath of fresh air

bringing new exciting experiences

All the bright colorful colors replaced the sky

by an unending darkness

Nights creatures coming back to life

Fear of the light gone from their eyes

Search for prey starting



An innocent girl walking the streets

unknowing to whats to come

Stalked by the creatures of the night

Her screams never heard through the dreams of those asleep

In the morning no one will find a body just a little drop of blood



All those that will miss her will never know

those that search may find out what happened

but will they survive or will their fate be the same

Would any believe their story of creatures unknown

No for none will see them

even in the dark they can hide

Never giving their secret away

Brightness in her eyes

A smile on her face

Brighten my world in a way no one ever has

My love for her growing with each passing day



Her beautiful face

Red hair coming in

Sparkling blue eyes

Shes my little one

My little red goblin



Little talkative girl

Ooohs ahhs das mas anything she can manage

Looking at her she smiles

Oh I love her, my little girl

In the darken sky I stand

the beauty of the moon

so captivating

Fills me with energy so bright

I can't take my eyes away



The ever changing sky

gives something new every night

A renewal for my soul

in a ever changing world

The darkened skies

lighten my mood

bright my day



The light of the moon draws my attention up

keeps my endless attention

raises my energy



Which star shall I wish on tonight

which will make my desire

true



Maybe to the right

No I like the left

The brightest of them all shall do



Oh darkened skies

with stars so bright

please make it

true!

Redden lips

swollen by unfamiliar actions

long is not the right word

eternity is more suiting



Crimson drops slowly surrounding

Trembling hands

drop the now lifeless form

Once had been life in this form

Where now flows through these veins



Not one thought of regret

It had to be done

Awareness kicks in

Your body reacts to your feeling

of wrongness



Run your mind says

Fight you body moans

Stay or Run

Decide fast, the clock is ticking



Is this place valuable

No

Then run my dear

For it is not worth saving

One year older

Not much has changed

Days keep coming

Work days away, never really seeing

Sleep night away, such a waste



Some new come and some old go

Adapting a part of life

So really nothing new



No endless days at the beach

No doing nothing, but still always bored

Worshiped, I tell you

She's worshiped

she screams,

they come running

she smiles,

cameras come out

She uhs or ohhs

and they talk to her.



If only they knew

all she ever wanted

was their attention