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4 entries this month
I Remember
04:50 Jan 12 2006
Times Read: 545
I remember when I was just a little kid
And you didnt care what I said and did
For me you were always there
Even though you hated how I followed you everywhere
I remember when I was a little older
And you taught me to be tougher and bolder
Whenever I did something wrong
You always took the blame and were strong
I remember when I was preteen
And to you I was so mean
But you took it all in and you didn't kill me
You were much stronger than I could ever be
I remember when I hit my rebelious years
And there were many fights and even more tears
You were always the one I could talk to and trust
Because you never made a big deal or fussed
I remember the day I lost my trust in you
You had told mom what you thought you had to
A secret I hadn't wanted her to find out about
Even though I was mad I knew you had to get it out
Finally I remember the day I lost you
And that day is today and I dont know what to do
You are moving out and leaving me behind
I dont think another brother like you I will find
I remember the days I most loved you
And the days I most hated you
I remember the days I most trusted you
And the days I felt nothing towards you
I will never forget the day
The four emotions collided and would not go away
Because you moved out of my life and out of the house
I for once was as quiet as a mouse
Illusions
04:34 Jan 12 2006
Times Read: 546
You have the best of friends
You have the parents ever
School is going great
You'll live forever
Your friends love you
Your parents are so understanding
Your so smart
On tope of the world your standing
Your friends leave you
They have nothing to do with you
Your parents said this would happen
Theyre gloating because what they said was true
All of a sudden
Quicker than expected
It hits you
It's like you were infected
Your all alone in the world
Not a soul is around
Nobody understands you
Your crying on the ground
It's like none of it existed
It was all gone so fast
It was like an illusion
That was real but now is the past
One last thing crosses your mind
As the blade slowls cuts
Deeper and deeper into your wrist
To think it would all last you must of been nuts
What if...
04:25 Jan 12 2006
Times Read: 547
What would happen,
If I were to die?
Would anyone notice,
And would they cry?
I could take some pills,
And die real slow.
Like molasis in winter,
Trying to flow.
Or I could cut myself,
And bleed until I am no more.
Cleaning up my body,
Would be quite a chore.
Than of corse there is,
The shotgun sitting over there.
Should I do it,
Do I really dare?
I suppose I could die these ways,
But it's not just dieing.
I must tell the truth...it's suicide,
No point in lieing!
What would happen,
If I were to die?
Would anyone notice,
And would they cry?
Love
04:15 Jan 12 2006
Times Read: 548
I once said that I loved you,
I once cared for you alot!
Then you threw that love away,
and we were NOT!
The thing was that I still cared,
And my love for you was still strong!
But you didnt feel the same way,
You thought that we were wrong!
You only wanted to be friends,
I wanted so much more!
But I couldnt change how you felt,
To you I had become a bore.
Then we did something stupid,
Foolish as all hell!
But whats done is done
So oh fucking well :S
There was just one problem,
My feelings for you grew.
And you were still uneffected,
To you we were still threw!
Now I have to get over you,
And figure out how to deal.
I guess we're gonna just be friends,
But that still won't ever change how I feel!!!
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