There are a great amount of people in my life who cannot figure out who or what I really am...I've struggled throughout the years and have had to deal with overwhelmingly painful situations...Mentallly and Physically.
I must say, I am one hell of a person. So many people, including myself, have put me through hell, and it has changed me...
MY STORY:
I used to be this sweet, innocent, little girl who loved the outdoors, loved the summer time...the girl who adored life and wanted to live it to it's fullest...the girl who laughed and giggled like there was no tomorrow...
Until HE took that away from me...
HE was my best friend...and HE betrayed me to no end...
Since then, I have changed...I am now bitter, I have a hard time trusting people...mental illnesses because of HIM...
Post-traumatic stress disorder...
Paranoia...
Insomnia...
Depression...
For years, I was living in Hell's Domain...in HIS grasp, where I could no longer live my life the way I had planned as a child...
I had NEVER in my life wished death upon someone...until now...
Only the ONE person, the ONE person who caused me to die on the inside, who took a piece of me with him and went on his marry way...
But I must say...there is another being that has also taken a piece of me...
My heart...
This is the person who lifted me up from the fires of hell into heaven's gaze...
Over three years now, we have been together and no way are we to be parted...
He helped me through my darkest times, never left my side, never did he turn his back in any way whatsoever...
If this isn't love...then what is?
This angel of mine helped me gain back my confedence in life, almost like when I was a child...
But I will never forget that day of gloom...that missing piece still lingers around with HIM and as left a whole in my self being...
I am somewhat the same as I was BEFORE the incedent, but I have been forever altered: I am more protective of my loved ones...if anyone layed a finger on any of them, so help me god...
I never thought I could love again, but that theory is long gone. I am happy and in love with the person who saved me from HIM and myself...my heart is forever his and I shall forever be loyal with graditude...
To replace the missing piece, I am currently involved with Psycic Vampirism. It has completed me in so many ways and it fits my now altered persona---I hate summer, too hot and humid, too sunny. I prefer winter over summer, it gets dark ealier and it's cold...I prefer the cold. The snow is absolutely gorgeous, too. I'm a sucker -no pun intended- for vampire books, movies, you name it. In fact, I'm currently working on a vampire movie and I hope to get it published and going someday. I love black leather. I love black, period. I love my now dark hair -I used to be blonde- and I love my brown eyes when the sunlight hits them -they're a reddish brown- although I'm not a huge fan of sunlight, but it's pretty cool. I also live in the darker and cooler basement of my house---the whole vampirism thing is REALLY working for me. It is ME...
OTHER FACTS ABOUT ME:
-I was born in the Philippines
-I love red and white roses, and also the black trillium. I like carnations, too
-I don't drink or smoke, or any of that stuff
-I hope to marry my beloved and start a wonderful family
-I'm a libra
-I LOVE to draw...my movie is animated
-I LOVE music, especially metal/rock, and I play guitar...but on days where I just wanna relax, I either play my piano, or meditate to my Flute Dreams cassette tape
Roses are red,
Violets are blue...
My rose is white,
And it is bleeding for you...
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