Name's Profile at Vampire Rave.

MY CONCEPT MIRRORS THOSE OF TheNameGame YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!!!
I SUPPORT ThisOne

I come from far, far away.
I live in a castle with enchanted characters.
Outside is somewhere that
you'll always stay

There's lots of little animals wandering around,
no one to make a sound
talking trees, and even a damn disappearing cat.
Now, where's my spiked bat?

There's even a witch and a villain.
Which is which I leave for you to figure out on your own.
Your resting place will never be known,
you'll forever remain alone.

I am neither fat nor skinny,
neither short or tall.
Your opinion doesn't matter at all
I am neither handsome or pretty nor am I ugly.
But I'm fairly sure that you're fugly

I am neither straight nor gay.
Neither clean nor dirty.
(You're more than likely a whore of a stray)
I am no pauper,
but neither am I a prince or princess.
(Please just fade away)

I am neither male nor female.
(Your personality's stale)
I am neither mysterious nor familiar.
(You're an epic fail)

I can say I am not your friend.
(Come on, we're not playing pretend)
But I am not the enemy either.
(Face it, you won't fit in)

I am a pretty simple person,
(Your IQ's just too low)
yet I am also complex.
(You're the reason behind my acid reflex)

The Basics:

Likes: Books, especially the Classics.
(Nothing to do with you)
Opera and Classical music.
(You have the appeal of fermented glue)
History. Myth and legends. Dragons.
(Why are you still here?)
Animals (the four-legged kind, not two).
(You still haven't got the clue?)

Dislikes:

Anything not listed above,
(Specifically you)
but most especially those who do not bother to read.
(Please invest in an IQ)

Hobbies:

People watching
It helps me keep them away,
I'd treat you like a stray
but, I don't want you to stay

Rating:

Rate whatever the hell you want.
(It's not like I care)
I am not gonna rate you back anyway.
("Clears throat" Go away)

I just can't be bothered.
(You're a waste of space)
Its not as if I need a number to tell me who I am.
(Apparently you need to save face)
Do you really need a number to make you feel worthy?
(Don't answer that, I've already seen
the look on your face)

Not interested in trying to code this profile,
(It won't change even if you throw a fit)
so just deal with it.
Who the hell needs fancy?
(I don't, so screw you)
Who needs overdone pictures added to a profile?
(Why are you so vile?)
It's too troublesome.

Friends? Not bloody likely.
(I'm trying to avoid you)
I am not interested,
(You're still trying to stay?)
because I am not a sociable person.
(Why won't you go away?)
I don't like being pulled into mind games and drama
(Stay away from me)
and other such bullshit.
(Putting up with you shouldn't be free)
I won't be adding you,
(Keep your distance, it's free)
so don't bother to add me.
(You're like a disease)
Fact is, I don't know you and don't care to.
(I'd treat the flu better than you)

Do NOT send me messages saying you have rated and added me. I don't care.
(So what if you don't think this is fair)
No, I am not going to add you.
(You old, dried up shrew)
I do not care how many profiles you have here,
(You're nothing but a steer)
what their screen names are or what your name.
(You're still the one to blame)
Any such messages will end up with you being blocked.
(I hope you're glocked)

I am not attached to my phone, laptop, kindle, tablet or any other such media.
(I have better things to do, unlike you)
I prefer to live my life, not spend it in the dungeons of some website.
(I guess living is something new)
There's already enough poor souls stuck in their parents' basements
(It's probably an unpleasant view)
who are glued to the monitor of their computers trying to be social in fantasy land
(Trust me, their life is bland)
because they can't socialize in real life. I am not going to be one of them.
(Their existence is a sin)
So more often than not, I probably won't be around.
(Even if you make a sound)
I am not one to stick in one place for long.
(You don't belong)

Age? Location? Sexual Orientation? Email?
(Why would I contact a snail?)
Phone Number? Gender? Partner Status? Pictures? Not on your life.
(You're still an epic fail)
I'd rather shove my head in a wood chipper.

In other words, none of your damn business.
(Have you gotten the clue?)
I am NOT going to be meeting you in the real world anyway.
(Stay away)
It's not as if I care to know anything about you. I am NOT owned by anyone,
(Zip, zilch, zero, none)
I am NOT anyone's pet. I NEVER will be.
(I'd rather mate with a bee)
I am NOT looking or going to hook up with you.
(You must have a loose screw)
I am strictly solo and I prefer it that way.
(Keep away)

Covens?
Why? It's my understanding with forced inductions that we don't have a choice where we go when we get to the level for induction.
(Don't tell me, it took you three times to fail the instruction to make it through)
So, don't bother sending me messages trying to recruit me, they will be ignored. And frankly, I am not interested.
(Just to be fair, I'll say it again, I still don't care)

Messages?
Don't bother with this either.
(You really blow)
I am not interested in making friends.
(Don't pretend, your life's a sin and everyone knows)
I have a bad habit of not responding. More than likely I will just ignore it.
(Are you throwing a fit? Suck it up and deal with it)

I won't bow or kow-tow to anyone.
(Especially not you)
I don't care who you are on here,
(Leave shrew)
I won't be kissing anyone's ass.

Fact is, you put your pants on same way I do,
(That's a miracle in itself)
one leg at a time. If this offends you, too bad, so sad.

No, not really.

One piece of advice I can give you though.
(You probably won't learn)
If you come at me with your issues, then you'd better be able to handle getting as good as you give.
(I wish you'd burn)
Don't go whining and crying about it. You'll find I am one sick and twisted individual, so what?

I am a lazy person by nature. If it is too time consuming, needs more effort than I am willing to spend, or costs me money that I would rather save, then you can bet I will pass on it.

If I think you are in the wrong, I will let you know.
Like now, just leave you over fed cow

If you sling it, be prepared to bring it,
(You will go down)
because I can assure you that I can and will.
(You will hit the ground)
You don't want to go toe to toe with me.
(You will experience misery)

If you are offended, then I will just say it's not as if I care.
(Oh well, move on, don't stop and stare)
People are too easily offended by everything under the sun.
(I want you gone and I'm not the only one)
I don't think I asked anyone to come visit this page.

You want sympathy? Look it up in the dictionary located between shit and syphilis.
(Leave, go away, don't stay)

I am not going to play mind games with people,
(And no, I don't want to know your name)
nor am I gonna get involved in any piles of monkey poo
(That probably belongs in a zoo)
that you people like to sling at each other, not my circus, man.

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