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a year ago i lost My Mother, tho i felt nothing toward this. I still have not cried over her loss. And i do not know why, but here is the thing that puzzles me. I can cry when someone yells or goes off on me, my emotions can jump from one to the other, like as easy as breathing. I guess it also goes on how i was treated growing up, specially when she showed favoritism toward one child. not to mention letting my siblings do, and say whatever they wanted to me even tho i was the eldest. not to mention how my father used his wrestling moves on me, and constantly made fun of me growing up. but still i should have felt something from this, but i did not. I have never gone threw any kind of change, suppose i may be defective in some way. He laughs.

I am not good on dates, and I cant remember certain things. tbh i have that condition were i can not picture things at all. No imagination and i tried the exercises but to no avail nothing works, I cant even escape into my own world. but in a way im kinda grateful because i do not need to think when i do creative writing it just comes out of my finger tips. tho i do hear the sound or feel my voice when i think, but to be honest when someone asks what are you thinking or on the lines of that when i say nothing that is the honest truth.

I do miss My Family, but they have treated Me so bad several times in the past. My Moms even come into my room, and threatened me and My things like she owned them. even tho i spent my money on the objects, I have been treated like i wasent apart of the family most times. walking all over me, constantly reminding me of my Mystakes making me feel like i shouldent even be alive...

Sorry i do not mean to fuss, or make a sceen... I am glad of what has happened i have changed for the better.

Smiles...

COMMENTS

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DreamEscape
22:20 Nov 28 2019

i know the feeling my family walks all over me all the time they even push me around telling what or what not to do..one of my aunts dont even like me dating she reather see me alone

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AngelDragonn24
00:32 Nov 29 2019

I'm sorry to hear that :(

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I spent most of my day sleeping, kinda hard to do anything when your in pain.

Got out of bed, had a cig. ate a cheese sandwich.

Then i sat here rating all the artical section, Now im moving to rate profiles and other things maybe if i rate everything on here i can get up in the levels lol.

Trying to find people to chat to on here, but theirs not a lot of active people online anymore.

Suppose im just not interesting enough xD

Ill post more latter, I have lost all my stories so i will try to post something interesting latter lol