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Okay,

This is shit. Everything is shit. I get in a fight with someone I really like because of stupid bullshit. What didn't start out to be competition turned into one, with who's puter was better with who's...I didn't think anything was wrong with the whole conversation myself, well accept I thought we were joking around with each other, apparently we weren't because it went into who's life sucked the worse and so on and so forth, which in turn I gotta "Fuck You" and a block and deletion. Jesus christ if I had known that that fucking conversation would hve turned out so childish, on both parties, I would have tried to have avoided it. I really liked him. he was the first guy in 2 1/2 years I have even really looked twice at and wanted to know him for him. Sometimes I wonder why I even bother with the male race anymore.



I mean christ does everything have to be a competition to them? Can't they see that not everything is worse or better than the other but everything is always different? Everything is always different in some way or the other. What does it matter who's life is worse as long as your there or want to be there for that person in the end ya know?



I wanted to be there for him and now I can't even reach him. So, I guess yet again, I have failed. Sokie, I'm used to it. I just hope my children never ask me relationship advice cause I'd have to tell them, "Sons, mom sucks at relationships..work on it yourselves."



Okay..closing for now...been real sick since friday, and I need to get up early and go to the doctor tomorrow to find out what's wrong with me.





me