The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

I know that am nothing special and also my looks are barely even average, but I had long been distancing from people.

Why? Because whatever the reason is, they keep abandoning me and also never be there for me at all. Never truly liked me whatever I do. I am too tired to deal with this shit. The more time passes the more you realise if its even worth it.

I only eat alone now and talk...........to my self as others sees it. Or they see me as a mute. I learnt people dislike me most when I even open my mouth.... they see me as a chatterbox, so now I do not even speak to anyone except to order and pay, sometimes I just signal them and tell them with signs. I am just too tired of being ignored and abandoned over and over so I burn any chance from creating a bridge or connection of any sort.

Does it feel lonely??? damn right it does but if no one likes me for who I am, I refuse to make any connection and be disappointed over and over.

My psychiatrist told me to give my relatives a chance, to open up a bit and I did more times than I can count, but none of them really does neither care. They speak to me just for the sake that they talked to me as a duty for being a relative but other than that........nada. Zilch nothing........ Not even a phone call or message to see if i am alive or well.....

friends...........do I even have any? Nope.

Lovers? none existent ....

just me.......... Might as well be a mute