The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

Milk shake!



Add your cow of choice to a blender, along with some fruit such as bananas, or squirrels. mix on highest setting for 45 minutes, adding a cup full of ice every 28 seconds. pour and enjoy.

COMMENTS

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Joli
18:20 Aug 10 2008

Squirrel shakes = baaaad juju. They watch...they are many. Shhhh...I've said too much already.

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Sunny side up eggs!

two eggs, flat metal object, and a heat creating object will be needed.



crack eggs onto your metal object, and place onto your heat source. make sure not to break the yellow pouch like thingy. it helps if you have butter, or animal lard, as this will make it cook more evenly....and not stick to your flat metal(possibly rusty) surface. now to check if you eggs are done, take a .45 magnum and fire several shots into its goey goey surface. did the egg explode? then it wasnt quite finished...try again.

COMMENTS

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Firedrake
13:39 Aug 13 2008

lol

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Potion #1: Chocolate syrup.



Take twenty one and one quarter chocolate bars(hershey) and melt them in the microwave. Do not remove them from their aluminum wrappers despite the warnings on the microwave, or the wrapper...this will add to the flavor....yes...add to the flavor...not cause a small explosion which will possibly kill you....that would be silly......have a first aid kit handy. Next scrape the chocolaty mess from your kitchen walls, and add a small amount of cyanide for that yummy almondy aftertaste. Dont be concerned, suger cancels out poison...everyone knows that. This recipe should serve three, well...up to five really, but the full effect wont be realized with so much milk added. And for a special surprise add just a pinch of cinnamon, a quarter teaspoon of baking soda, and a cap full of vinegar



Mmmmm, i can taste that premature suici-err...chocolate, now....enjoy?