The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

The worst part about anything that's self destructive is that it's so intimate. You become so close with your addictions and illnesses that leaving them behind is like killing that part of yourself that taught you how to survive.

I live in a body that had survived medical trauma, emotional betrayal, sexual violation, and psychological warfare. And that body deserves peace, trust, and tenderness. I do not owe anyone my fear anymore.

she doesn't
want to get high, not really
she just doesn't
want to feel.

she
doesn't
want
to be here.

& i don't blame her at all.
some stories
are too heavy
to stay conscious for.

i am not who i once was.
i met my rockbottom and beyond;
my garden & grave.

a garden
risen from the soil
of the mossy grave
that almost got me.

some parts made it ...
most didn't.

i'll never be that me again.

rockbottom
wasn't my funeral.

it was my
introduction.

to the version
of me that doesn't run.
that doesn't numb.
that stays
even when
it
hurts.

not perfect.
not healed yet.
just
learning
how to be me.

your monsters
have always been safe
with me

i do not fear
that darkness inside you
i was raised
by my own

i know the shapes
of wounded things
i know how to
sit with demons

all your pieces
can find peace
here