The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

-sigh-
06:21 Feb 29 2012
Times Read: 433

Today I made stuffed mushroom for the first time...it was really simple actually and delicious!



Mother and I almost ate the entire plate!







In other news; went and saw my grandfather. For the first time in my life he actually seemed his 75 years of age and it hit both my mother and I hard as to how old he truly is. This man was my first father figure. He taught me how to fish, clean deers correctly after shooting them, early in the morning we'd head down to the chicken coop and get the eggs. I helped him plant in the vegetable patch. And after a long day of work we'd sit on the swinging bench and watch the sun sink down behind the hills as we just talked or sat in comfortable silence.



He means the world to me and I know sooner or later I am going to lose him.



It's a heart break I don't wish upon anyone.....

10:34 Feb 28 2012
Times Read: 434

So my grandfather had his surgery yesterday morning, I missed it due to work but today I will head up there with my mother. Apparently he asked about me right after they brought him back into his room. That made me feel so guilty. I know I couldn't help it but....if something would of happened and I not be there...



It would of crushed me.





But they said he is doing well. The only set back was when he attempted to eat solid food he ended up throwing it up...plus side...he threw up on my aunt. >]



Karma is a bitch indeed.







I just...I can't wait for him to get out. I know they can't cure it. He'll have cancer 'til the very end but I know he will die because it is his will to do so. Not the cancers. I'm just glad the mass is gone.



I feel sick just thinking about it.



I can't wait until Relay for Life starts up. This year I will give it my 120% for my grandfather.

Whoops.
09:05 Feb 24 2012
Times Read: 443

Aha, I am pretty sure I am the most awkward person of all who dwell here.



I can't even reply to a simple compliment without making things awkward.



:D

Bleh
08:17 Feb 24 2012
Times Read: 445

So yesterday didn't go over as planned.





Decided to forgo sleep the other night since we were to be at the hospital at five in the morning; that was a bad idea because as soon as I got home...I crashed until this afternoon and now, two sleeping pills down and it's two am.





Bleh.





The second down fall was shortly after arriving at the hospital my uncle comes out to address the the surgery has been cancelled for my grandfather's surgeon has been struck with a bad case of gout which has landed him in the hospital as well.



Yes, our surgeon fell ill.



How bizarre is this?



Now we are told that it should be rescheduled for monday. My boss is going to kill me. To get Thursday off was a HUGE hassle on both of our parts and now I need monday. She's going to kill me.



I guess I could miss the whole thing, but you know. I feel like I should be there, the rest of the family will be. I mean we counted the people from today, that is a total of ten people without including my grandfather.



That's a lot of people.



I just don't want him to feel as if I don't care and I do care...very much so.



The surgery is risky, as are all surgery's, but the first 24 hours are critical. He's not exactly young anymore and the chemo has done quite a bit to his body. I just....I don't know what i'd do if I wasn't there and something went wrong.

My thoughts
05:56 Feb 23 2012
Times Read: 464

I don't like ICP. I never did, I did give them a fair try and I just....don't like it.



I don't put it down or anything. Each person likes their own thing but I must say.....I'm starting to find 'jugglos' or whatever they are called...irritating.



Now most of these 'people' i've run across are just ignorant. Spitting things that don't make sense with terrible sentence structure. I mean just because you love the style and the music of a band it does not give you permission to act like a idiot.





Once again, nothing against the music. Just everything against idiots.



Feel free to leave the hate in the comments below.



:]

<3
11:26 Feb 21 2012
Times Read: 471




"Roses"



I've walked the distance, I paid my dues and tried to have a go at what I thought I knew was real, held

no appeal

I've been to places, I've seen the tidings,

I bought a book of rules for every coin that I could steal

And so I came to gaze upon the stars, when they were yet unborn

And consequently, tear at my old scars, and the mask I had outworn



So when I'm crying alone

Yeah, when I'm cold as a dying stone



Grow me a garden of roses

Paint me the colors of sky and rain

Teach me to speak with their voices

Show me the way and I'll try again



I've heard the rumors, started fires, I sowed a sordid lot of plays for keeps for what I need, behold

the demons that I freed

I've tried my best at wearing the hard hat, but healing doesn't seem to happen when you hide away the

seed

And so I came across the medicine man, and he showed me what I'd forlorn

For if I'm stayed it happens by my own hand, and my own voice full of scorn



So when I'm crying alone

Yeah, when I'm cold as a dying stone



Grow me a garden of roses

Paint me the colors of sky and rain

Teach me to speak with their voices

Show me the way and I'll try again



Without you I'm nothing at all

And life has the face of a morbid game

With you nothing seems impossible

It all seems to fit the frame



So when I'm crying alone

Yeah, when I'm cold as a dying stone



Grow me a garden of roses

Paint me the colors of sky and rain

Teach me to speak with their voices

Show me the way and I'll try again





































Can't stop listening to this song.

It's amazing and breath taking. I cannot waiting until they come to America....if they come that is. lol



Everything they do touches a chord in your soul. Every note played, every word.....stunning.





I've fallen in love.



^-^

Oh mah lawd
11:28 Feb 17 2012
Times Read: 480

So, I always keep hearing about the Tyra 'vampire' episode....so I decided to watch it.





Im in tears



xD





This is hilarious.

Nightmares
09:32 Feb 16 2012
Times Read: 488

Ive been asleep for less than 30 minutes.



Already, my heart it pounding and im shaking so bad.



I dont even know what I dreamt of but im terrified to go back to sleep.



I cant even stop myself from crying.



Whats going on with me?

Mini rant
14:54 Feb 15 2012
Times Read: 495

This is me....being exhausted.





Broke down and went into the doctors this morning. Because lately I haven't really slept, been craving mass amounts of sugar and have really odd dry patches on my skin (I have naturally oily skin) Well it turns out I am suffering from Adrenal exhaustion due to copious amounts of stress.



Though to be honest I didn't even know I was under mass amount of stress.



Other than being tired and sugar obsessed....I feel fine.



But I guess I am not.



Within 24 hours I have had two people approach me and ask me why I don't talk to them anymore. To be honest I knew I was pulling away, I just didn't know why but I was.



The more I think about it. It's because these two have no real drama going on for me to fix like other people do. I am currently waist deep with two very emotionally unstable people who call me at all sorts of hours during the day and night. Then work keeps flipping me from midnights to afternoons.



That and this month is really really busy.



My card was being used by unknown internet person and my account frozen. Had to go through so much work with the bank. Then wait a few weeks to get my new account number, then a few more days for the pin. Then it wouldn't allow me to activate my card so back to the bank I go, after working another midnight shift...alone.



Then its the boyfriend's mother and fathers birthdays this week and after threeish years with knowing them so well I feel obligated to do something nice in return. Then of course valentines day was yesterday. Though it turned out a lot of fun. My day was delayed because boyfriend had exams in school and so he couldn't skip his classes. Which bumped us off the course of going to a really nice restaurant in the city so we settled for Olive garden, which was fantastic even if we did have to wait.





Oh and my friends birthday is coming up this Saturday and I completely forgot. So I need to hurry up and find him something D: because he once upon a time was my cousin and even before we found that out he was my best friend back in high school. So he more than deserves a gift here and there. ^^



Also, something im also not so pleased about.



My 21 birthday will be coming up sometime in the future of this year. And something I really wanted to do was apply and see if I would be able to donate my eggs to families whose eggs refuse to become fertile. I always thought it was a great cause because I have a couple of friends who are unable to have children on their own. And when they found out....it was really devastating. And since I am not using my eggs currently I thought, why the hell not?



Well I brought it up over dinner last night and boyfriend was not pleased. Even though I wont be carrying the child nor will I raise them they will still have my DNA. He says he doesn't want me to have 'children' with anyone else but him. Even if they are not my children. Plus he tacked on the 'what ifs'. What if they come looking for you when they are older? What will you say? What will I say? Cause when they find you they are going to find me. What about our children...how would they feel?





Well being a girl from a family of seven siblings, all half siblings to. One other from my mother they rest from my father and his many loves. I know how it feels to find random sibling and hunt down my sperm donor. Unlike him. This isn't a pleasure thing. This is about giving to someone who can't have on their own. I feel that it is the least I can do. That is IF I can even do it. They run so many medical and mental tests on you. I may be screened out at any time.



But he looked so unhappy at the thought.



I don't want to jeopardize my relationship either. Cause I know it will bother him forever if I go and do this.





Blah!





I just want to sleep.

My super fluffy lovey dovey make you sick its so sweet entry!
09:39 Feb 10 2012
Times Read: 502

I'm such a bleeding heart romantic type of person.



Here I am listening to super melt gooey lovey dovey songs that would make even the sweetest of people gag and yet all I can do is look a little love struck while I reply the song over and over.



I'm starting to scare myself xD



But it can't be helped....im a women in love.



-le sigh- Even after three years....I still am amazed by him.





OK PROXY STOP IT!!!!





Keep those squishy bits stuffed down soilder!





hehe





OK, ok...I think I am better.



I'm such a girl sometimes.



But it's OK.



I think I am allowed to be a little soft here and there.



^^



Well super squishy love journal is at it's end!



Buh bye nows

Bahaha
09:13 Feb 08 2012
Times Read: 520

Ahhhhhh....I am a terrible person.



:3







So I am derping around on FB when I get a random chat message from someone who I haven't spoken to in to in a long time. Not, that I mind...becccause I really don't care for her too much, but i'm nice so I try accept her request for chatter.



Well then she drops her news; "I might be preggers"



First things that came to mind:



-I thought this would of happened by now

-Abort! Abort! Abort!





But you know, I quickly squash these thoughts down and respond with a a congrats and then tag on:

"M'hm, but it's scary. Because what you do from now on will drastically shape the rest of their lives o.o"





She went oddly went a little quite for a moment then started talking about how bad my ex was as a lay.



Gee, thanks bitch.



^-^



[/kattyremarks]

21:21 Feb 06 2012
Times Read: 527

-sigh-





Leg itches.....so I scratch it right?



Few minutes later leg itches again; I go to scratch it....come away with wet fingers....I somehow cut my leg. Rawr, stupid nails.

Derps
05:58 Feb 06 2012
Times Read: 534

Oh god, so much lulz.





Today I got a message, that sorta freaked me out because yes the man who sent it used my real name and my location. Later to even be so callous to send me a screenshot of my facebook account.



I'll admit, this warranted me to panic for a good bit. So I went over all the possible reason why someone would target me of all people, and I came up with nothing. So I finally did ask why so much effort for what seems to be so....pointless. Well apparently this is because of my Anonymous icon. Apparently; I am 'pretending' to be a part of the anonymous group.



Cause you know...supporters don't exist.





Ah so much derp it's bordering the line of herp derp.

xD

Upcoming bands....
07:21 Feb 02 2012
Times Read: 538

So I doubt anyone has heard of the band 'Vultress' for it is still in the early stages of new town bands, quickly going on their second tour come this spring.





I am often extremely critical of this band, oh and I do mean critical, but that is for one reason only. The lead guitarist is my little cousin. Annoying and irritating as he may be, he has talent that is waaaaaaaay past his year (not that I will ever tell him that)





Either way, seems he's stopped band hopping and settled into this one and they seem to be doing fairly well.



Personally I think the vocalist needs to work a little harder to keep from being pitchy in some areas. The band itself is a good blend of heavy rifts, sound drumming, a synth player and of course a nice bass sound. It's rather an odd blend but somehow they managed to put it together.







And in all interests of whoreing out the band...heres their FB link xD





http://www.facebook.com/vultress?sk=app_178091127385