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I have never been able to sleep very well at night. The pull to stay awake when the sun goes down has always been strong. It's like the sun drains my energy and the darkness makes me feel alive. It's been even worse as of late. I have been writing alot at night. My journal is always there when I need it. Lately I've been thinking about Love. I mean what is that emotion really for? It causes too much pain if you ask me. I used to think that everyone had a soul mate. Someone out there that completed every aspect that you are missing and if you met them you would just know. I'm not so sure anymore. It might be better to feel nothing at all. Love is a weakness. It blinds you. It takes away your free will and it cripples you! I am 26 and I've never been in love before. I used to pray to a god who obviously doesn't exist. I would ask him to send me my soul mate, that one person who would be there for me and never leave me. Alot of people tell me I'm still young and Love will find me if I have an open mind. How much longer do I have to wait if that person is truely out there?