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I thought I would take a leaf out of Daire's Journal and type in random thoughts.. not sure how long this will last, as I tend not to share much of myself....



So here goes.



I hate working!! Why can't I just win lotto and do what I want for the rest of my life.



eww.. what a superficial random thought..



Maybe it's not a good idea for everyone to see my inner thought workings hhahahah

Let me give you a visual....



You are lying ona cold table, equipment all around, your head is swimming nicly from the valium they gave you 1/2 hour a go and your eye ball is numb from the drugs



Your doctor says, open wide, which you do and he soves a lid opener in there to keep the lids open.. you blink profusly for a few moments to no avail while your other eye is covered over with a patch



He says.. relax, yoiu will feel a little pressure. And then what appears to be a mini suction cup is placed over your cornea area and your epofelium is sucked right off



Everything is now very blurry and very watery



Tears fall down the side of your face.



There is loads of what appears to be scraping happening, and your vision gets worse and worse, all you can see clearly is the bight red light up ahead and loads of movement



Your breathing very heavy.. like the sensation before you faint.



You feel his hand come under your chin and cup it firmly, he says stay perfectly still and look straight ahead. You reply, I'm trying too



The lazer fires up and you hear crackling, the red light ahead is flashing around.



You smell burning flesh and it takes you a second to realise... it's your flesh.



More fiddling around in your eye ball, blurry vision and you take a stab that he's put a lens over the work, lubbed you up and a nurse has come to help you up.



Next thing you know you're in a dark room.. post op.. large comfy chair and you're lying back thinking fuck that was quick... i hope the drugs don't wear off too quick, coz this one is going to hurt like hell.



A nurse arrives 5 minutes later and gives you a bag full of stuff. She goes through what to take thwn, gives you 2 panadine forte (30mg of codine thank you very much) and gives you a tube.. with instructions, break in case of emergancy.. hard core drugs for pain.



So... after they give you some really groovy shades you step out of the surgery and head for home...



Thank god for chaffeurers! Mid way home, the anesthetics begins to wear off and you begin to panic of the possible pain.



But you make it home in time... take 2 of the sleeping tablets they gave you and you're out until the morning for a post op chekc up



To your surprise.... the next day is fine. You don't take any more meds as there really is no pain.... this is where it all lulls you into a false sense of security... becasue by the evening... the nerve ending have woken up and started to repair, and decide to give you sharp shots of pain as they fire off at regular intervils.



Thank god you didn't take all the sleeping tablets the night before and the pain killers... these will get you through the night and what it tuned to be a bad second day.



Day 2 is not so good.... thank god for drugs



Day 3.. much better.. here I am.. and looking forward to tomorrow for my chekc up and the removal of the lens.



The vision is still poor. The eye is a little dry and red, but other than feeling tired I am well



And in need to SHOP!!!! Hanging to go to the gym!!!!

With butterflies in my tummy, tis 15 minutes till I leave....



I feel like I have the constant need to pee.. and I want comfort food!!!!



And I think I'm getting my period...



Life sux today

After another rather nasty week I am back on my feet again today... just in time for surgery tomorrow.



I have to be at the institute at 4.30pm



I'll be there 2 hours



While I thought the proceedure would be quick I assumed recoery would be as quick as the Lasik surgery I had 2 years agao.. I was wrong



Saturday morning I will be sent back for a post op check up and then back to bed.



I will be in bed until Tuesday.



They will give me meds, pain killers and sleeping tablets until they remove the lens on tuesday



How do I feel about it?



Actign brave with family and friends, but when it was 6 weeks ago, it didn't bother me, now every time i think about it's tomorrow, my tummy does a flip



I am nervous, anxious, worried and scared... don't tell anyone shhhh

She opened her buggered eye finally, and crawled to th computer to put her hand up as still being alive.



Well, that was the longest time to get over this thing. Appointment this coming friday and operation the following friday.... never thought I would hear me say this, but I can't wait to have this operation.... I am sick of this life style.



On a positive note, I am well rested, in good spirits, thought bored senseless.



I am taking it easy today, off to the office via taxu in 15 minutes for an hour to see what kind of bebauchery my team have been up to while the cats away.. then home for another nap.



Sorry about the typos, I can''t see the scren quite well enough yet hah!



*fondles and molestations*



MM