The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

A little boy wanted $100.00

very badly and prayed for

weeks, but nothing happened.



Then he decided to write God a

Letter requesting the $100.00.



When the postal authorities received

the letter to God , CANADA, they

decided to send it to the Prime Minister



The Prime Minister was so amused

that he instructed his secretary to

send the little boy a $5.00 bill.



The Prime Minister thought this would

appear to be a lot of money to a little boy.



The little boy was delighted with the

$5.00 bill and sat down to write a

thank-you note to God, which read:



Dear God: Thank you very much for

sending the money. However, I noticed

that for some reason you sent it through

OTTAWA, CANADA and those assholes

deducted $95.00 in taxes.

A teacher was doing a study testing the senses (taste) of first graders using a bowl of lifesavers.



The children began to say:



Red......................Cherry



Yellow................Lemon



Green..................Lime



Orange .............Orange





Finally the teacher gave them all HONEY lifesavers. After eating them, none of the children could identify the taste.



Well," she said, "I will give you all a clue. It's what your mother may sometimes call your father."



One little girl looked up in horror, spit her lifesaver out and yelled, "Oh, my God!! They're ass-holes!