The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

Consider this the suicide note for my feelings. I'm locking them away, I never want to feel my heart beat like a caged bird. I never want to feel the touch of violet aura on my soul. Never again, will I let my skin feel a tender touch. Never a soft breath on my skin. I lock this heart away, never to emerge. I will remain a lost soul. I'll never let another man stare into my green/blue eyes and see a feeling pass. I am not for sale, for any currency. No money, gift, or feeling will ever change this. I will simply be the husk of the women they all knew. I will be me, but love will never be a part of my life again. The term is used to loosely in today's society. I have never felt true love requited. So I do not know the complete feeling. And if the stories are true, then I never do.

COMMENTS

-

---

MasterMel2
19:55 Sep 24 2011

O know you have the ability to lovce, and be loved. There is someone out there, be it male/female who can, and will love, and treat you as the dearest one I've known you to be, even in this short time. You have a balance of beauty that transcends others and their shortcomings.



*huggles and kisses*



Mel

---

nightwalkerbloodlust
15:40 Sep 26 2011

wow such a powerful emotion so sad for ya that ur heart got broke i know what ya going through if ya need to tlk im here for ya

---

POST COMMENT

I'm just sitting here at my parents, in the storage room soon to be bedroom. Regretting every decision I've made in that past two weeks. I shouldn't have cheated, I shouldn't have lied. I shouldn't have chosen to leave. I shouldn't have gotten on that bus. I shouldn't have told him what my mother said. I shouldn't have continued to talk to him... What i should have done, was kept standing in the road as that semi came at me at 50mph. I shouldn't have chickened out at the last minute. Then everything would be fine. He'd be rid of me and i could be content in watching over him... But i moved... and Now he hates me, and my heart will never heal. I don't know If I should keep fighting, or let my demons crush me once again...

COMMENTS

-

---

MasterMel2
20:03 Sep 24 2011

But you're still here to remember the lessons learned from the mistakes and heal from the hurt and pain. you can do this. i have many times, and will continue to do so. So will you. Life doesn't end at your age.. Your heart will heal if you allow it. Forgive and love yourself. That's a hard thing, even for me, who's had spotty relationships on occasion. I've been there, sweetheart.



You live, learn those hard lessons, and determine to progress onward, always.

---

POST COMMENT

Thursday Sept 1, 2011 at roughly 1pm, I said the hardest goodbye I'll ever have to, and I'm hoping it wont always be goodbye. But that is his decision. It pains me to think about and I think I'll always cry when I do. I wish I had been a better person and maybe It wouldn't have happened. I made stupid decisions and hurt the man I love. And though he may not believe me, I truly am in love with him. But I was not ready I guess. But I punished myself, feeling his fingers slip away from mine as I climbed those greyhound steps shattered my heart and the broken pieces lodged in my throat and eyes. I haven't stop crying and the lack of him beside me at night made it the most difficult sleep I've had. I constantly think about him. Those deep blue eyes watching me from the bus dock. I wanted to run Back to his arms and never let go. But I wouldn't have gotten back on that bus. I cry endlessly and pray that one day I could have a second chance. I know he doesn't give them. And I'm nothing special, but I regret leaving even though it was best. Maybe when I've grown up more and stop lying... I'll be worth his affections. But for now, I'll wait for those phone calls and listen to him say the words that build me up and break my heart that I cant feel him. I pledge to myself and vow, that I will not quit fighting to make myself better until I can feel his arms around me again. My heart can belong to no other. I am his, his only, always and forever.



For the man I love and always will.

By: Julie Patty

COMMENTS

-

---

SleeperKing27
17:29 Sep 03 2011

thats beautiful............

but....



you can do better







in time all wounds heal

---

SLEEPERKING30
05:58 Aug 16 2012

.........................

---

POST COMMENT