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Well in the news yesterday I heard them label being fat as a disease.

I know I have heard that alot from many people that have been fat and learning to deal with it. By finding couseling and working out to fix both the mental and the pysical problems with being fat.

But the reason they listed in the news was to better help overweight people still beable to put working out at the gym down on their information and still keep their health benefits.

But what really gets me is that they not only do that but say that fat moms lead to fat kids. That because the low income mom has a bad view of working out or being out side that the child will be the same way.

That is not true, my mom was fat and went out side when she could. Even hearing alot of negative things from peeople. She took us to the park and we played.

I can say that I ended up fat because of the mental part of it.

Pushing all my pain down and covering it up by eating cake. And as an adult I am slowly breaking out of that habit and loving the idea of getting to the gym and working out. I even walk about a good 17 blocks to the library and back when its not raining.

And to top that off I am the mother of a very healthy little boy that runs and plays out side all the time with me. And I am about to have another baby and I will do the same with him as I did my first son.

So the media and the study they used can bite my big fat ass.

: Note: If your wondering what I am talking about. Go to Fox59 news. and look up fat disease.

That is some bull shit and they know it.

Weeks and almost two months have gone by and I have almost forgetten about allen. Yet at my lower moments i start rememeber him and the way he treated me. Still what makes me sicker is that I also started to think back on another ex that treated me like this. Zack.

He was worse and it took me four years to get over him and afew bad relationships to boot.

I would hate to have that happen again so I am just going to do me and raise my kids.

Because I am done getting hurt I want some one to be there for me. To jump through hoops for me like i did all these years.

Lets see a guy be that loyal to me and not be younger than me or close to death.

To day I got out of the house for two days in a row. So i am happy but more so about the end of a bad thing in my life.

I gave him an ultimatim like he kept giving me and I found that he doesn't like to jump when others ask for him to . Yet he loved to see me jump like a trained lioness through firey hoops. But the lioness has the keys now and stepped out and is not coming back.

I have only one thing to prove to him and I will do that in the coming month in court.

* smiles happily* God i love this day. but the good thing about its is that today is gay pride day here in the mid west. And for the Downtown all the way down to 16 th streets cars are parked and families are walking to come downtown to see the floats and enjoy the one world party.

i love it out there, so wish i had some cash to buy stuff with but the happy feeling i get from all this proud people is awesome and draw dropping.

After not hearing from him in weeks and days. he decied to contacted me late at night after i was here ready to give him anoher chance.

I kow going back is the bad thing and yet when i see him i eel over joyed.

Which i know is wrong, so I ask all that read this to prey that where every he is . That he is okay but to prey also that I stick to my guns and walk away.

This happened to today and I have to say before this. I was pissed like crazy at the stuff that had was going on before this happened. So if you are reading this... then you know that this is something really speacial. And I really wanted to share it.

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12:28pm

had the most blessed thing happen to me today.i had an appointment to see my ob but the clinic i go to got closed.so i walked seven blocks to get the library pissed off and wanting to complain. i stopp and call the place they moved to only to be told that i have to go to wishard for all my visits now. and i called them only to be put on hold to get to the place where i need to place the appointments with them.then get put on hold after she tells me there are no opening and that a doctor was on the line.i have a minute phone and all that being put on hold its eating them up.i am more than mad now and i have to pee. because i drank water before i went thinking i would be going to the clinic for my appointment.when this little old man comes up and tells me something to get my attention. I say please no more bad news like me running out of minutes.i tell him my story of what is going on and he give me four dollars for the bus to go out there and place the appointment.i tried to tell him what they told me but he stopped me and told me about his wife and that she was older than he was and she would have been 91 this year but died three years ago.they looked so cute in the [photos he showed me. I sat there in awe rethinking my anger. and then looked up and said to god. what ever you have planned is going to be something good and big.

COMMENTS

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ladybriarrose
02:42 Jun 05 2013

Sometimes you just can't help but wonder if "everything really does happen for a reason."

I love hearing stories like this. Thank You for sharing. :)

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I have been way form the site for a while. One was because of the lack of net acces the other because of I moved.

I moved away for the pain that was slowly killing me back to the old pain that was their before.

In that old place i found something to make me stronger and that was school and to find a better job to make sure i had a roof over my head to get my son back for his father.

During that time as well I met someone that i though would be different but in the end was only the same thing wrapped up in the perfect package that i had wanted for 11 years. With in the time frame of 8 months he had me jumping through hoops and doing all i could for him and nothing for me. That is until he found out that he got me pregnate then he wanted nothing to do with me.

* Smiles* But I am good I waiting for this new little one to be born then its straight to court to have a test done on both this little joy in my life and my first as well.

And though this name seem like the scary part this is only the begining as I clean my life up of the drama from the past and what may lay before me.

I can only pray that when it all clears I have my sons, my faith and all my friends and true family standing by me.

* bows* Keep reading for more updates.