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Aug 29 Scorpio (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): Your selective recollection makes it possible for you to completely trust someone again, and in doing so, you make this person want to be trustworthy. Focus on the good in others, and that's what emerges.

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That's my horoscope for today, and it's weird how true it is.

I've survived orientation week at college, and classes start tomorrow. It's not too bad here. The communal bathrooms are no big shock after living in the shelter, and I'm used to changing in front of people from theatre. My roomate is practically the opposite of me. However, we're getting along really well. My luck, however, is that I get a mild case of bronchitis this week. I went to the doc back home today and got some meds, so I should be all better in a few days. I'm trying to add a few things to make the dorm seem more cozy and comfortable, but I still feel like I always have to be ready for the next thing that jumps out at me. Well, that's about it really. Perhaps I'll have something more interesting to write about after classes tomorrow.

Let's see, what have I been up to lately? Well, I've dropped Russian from my schedule, and I'll be taking American Politics instead. Which, for me, is more of a debate class. Oh, the fun I will have. *grins evilly* I went and got my books, which cost $600, more than I have to pay out of pocket for tuition. Oh, yes, my doctor put me on Sarafem, which is just another name for Prozac. Not for depression, but for my pms rages when I want to kill everyone, including myself at times. I've been in a very good mood the past few days. I also found out that a friend of mine who has been suffering from cancer the past 5 years died on Wednesday. I wish I could have been there for him, since I moved I had no idea how bad he had gotten. That's two people I knew from my old school dying within a month of each other. If that doesn't make you re evaluate how you live your life, I don't know what would. I'll be leaving on Wednesday, and I probably won't be back on the internet until Saturday or so. The best way to reach me would be to leave a message on here, or call my cell phone. That's about it.

Where to begin after being gone for so long? I should probably explain. We had to switch internet companies, and my ability to be online the past few weeks was slim to none. I had to postpone my driving test, and I'm taking it the day before I leave. I have to take it with a rental car because mine has no horn and the speedometer sticks, and it would cost over 500 dollars to fix. It was between a fully functional car and textbooks, I chose the books. I've had so many different appointments this past week. Doctor for shots, optometrist for new glasses (I'm getting emo glasses. tee hee) and back to the doctor today for allergies and my pms mood swings, which have gotten a lot worse. *watches everyone cower and flee in fear* I leave for college on wednesday, and the days seem to be going faster the closer I get to leaving. I still have so much to do, and it's stressing me out really bad. Oh yeah, and my fish died. On top of everything else, it decided to up and die on me. Poor Dmitri. I got a new one, but have yet to name it. It's bright red with teal streaks in the fins, any ideas would be greatly appreciated. I was wandering around Jester's the other day and got a new ring. It's a beautiful fairy and I loves it. I also got my hair cut and colored, and I look older because of it. Anyways, I really miss all of you that I haven't been able to talk to lately, and I send out my love to a special few. *hugs*

Sunday night I only got 3 hours of sleep before journalism camp. It went well, although I had to slip into my Mary Sunshine persona. I even ran into an old friend of mine from Perry, and we caught up a bit. I left early and took my driving lesson, and that went really well too. I drove over 21 miles, and I have 3 more lessons to go before I take my test on the 17th. When I got home, I got some of my stuff done, then I got an email from the guy who I'm working with. He wants me to do a presentation on spelling and punctuation, AP style. Well, I made and tried to print handouts, and tried to make copies of some other handouts I had already had. Well, my printer decided to be a fucking ass, and I spent 5 hours trying to fix it. I nearly threw the piece of shit out my window, and on top of that, my computer decided to say ha ha, fuck you, and keep shutting down. Not to mention, and those of you who know me will understand this, I've had no coffee today. At all. And on three hours of sleep. That makes for a very edgy and hostile me. And oh, look, it's one in the morning. Sleep less and I'll stop having insomnia my ass. Crackhead illegal immigrant doctor. Anyway, I apologize that I'm a bit behind in returning my messages, I'll get to them within the next few days.

Today was really productive. I took my driving class written test, and I passed it. Only missed one, and didn't bother to study. I start in car next week, and I should have my license by the 20th. That's my goal. Oh, yes, those Mr. Clean Magic Erasers are the god of all sponges. I bow down to them. I went and got all the things I need for my dorm room, and I went a bit crazy. As in super soft fuzzy purple fur comforter, pillows, blanket, and bathrobe. I also got a purple laundry bag, dry erase board, sheets, pillowcases, bathroom caddy, and towels. The only thing I got that wasn't purple was my hangers. They're black. Then I ran over to the Sprint store and paid my bill, so my cell phone is finally back on. Woot!! Tomorrow I'm going clothes shopping, which is not my favorite thing. In fact, I hate clothes shopping. It's nearly impossible to find clothes to fit my figure that don't make me look like a boy or a slut. Finding that happy medium is a pain in the ass. Well, that's about it. Oh, I almost forgot. My mom told me that my eyes are changing color again. They're going from green to an aqua blue. They haven't been that bright since I was 7 or 8. I used to have bright aqua blue eyes, but then they turned green, then gold, then green again, and now they're going back to aqua. I wonder why, it's kind of weird.

I fucking hate how people can affect my mood...

I haven't written in a long time, in any of my journals, and I probably won't be posting this anywhere else. I've just been feeling lost lately, what with losing contact with every one of my high school friends, and feeling restless. I can't seem to pay attention to anything for more than 10 minutes at a time, and I still can't sleep. Just trying to get things together for college, and keep myself from falling apart at the same time. I've gotten sensitive again, and little things (like not being able to check my class schedule) are throwing me into a full blown panic. I haven't actually spoken to anyone except my mother, dentist, and my driving instructor in over 2 weeks. I'm in a good mood, and I've put up some of my art and more poetry on deviantart (the link is on my profile), but it's becoming harder to stay upbeat when there's no one around me. Next week I'm getting thrown to the lions, with mentoring at the journalism camp 4 hours a day, and trying to fit in 8 hours of in car lessons. At camp, I was recently told that me and another guy will be doing all of the copyediting work, plus story coaching because none of the students want to edit. I'm just jumping for joy on this one. As for the driving lessons, after the in car, I have one week to get my driver's license before I leave. No pressure there, none at all. I noticed that once my cell phone went out, I have not gotten a single call or email from anyone. That just shows how much I'm loved. I could die and no one would notice until they wanted me to do something for them. That's all.