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Today was my birthday and i have to admit it sucked for 22 hours out of 24. I spent most of the day alone because birthdays are for family and since i lost mine it wasn't worth celebrating. There was two good things that are great about my birthday and they are; 1st is that fact that i made it to 42 and i could be dead, 2nd is that i meet this wonderful woman and we spent two wonderful hours together today. And for those two hours we shared something special to me that no other woman could give me. She is so special, caring, and so giving that i don't ever have to ask for anything. She knows of my past and the pain that i have gone through. She understands that trust with me is very important and that it is earned and not given. Today she made me feel like a real man again, and at the same time i feel guilty because legally i am still married and i have never been with anyone but her since she left me for another man. I guess that i took my vowels serious and the fact that she believed in me and was the only one who knew id beat cancer. So a big hug and kiss to you Julie Carmichael, i cant thank you enough ever for standing by me at that most scariest point in my life. But now i feel i have to move on with my life and i am sorry that today i shared something with this special woman but i needed it. It made me realize that your never coming back and i need to live again. I hope someday you forgive me, i never meant to break our vowels but i am tired of being lonely. I hope you and our girls live your life to the fullest and the three of you will live in my heart forever and every for as long as i live, and that is a promise. So now i am about to go file for a DIVORCRE and i will send it to you very soon, I hope Dave is going to marry you and treat you like the woman i have loved for the last 9 years of my life. I know i wasn't perfect but you know in your heart all i ever did was try to make you happy, keep you smiling, and always doing what i thought was right for you and our family. I am sorry that i was thrown a curve ball in life, but we together beat it "DAMN CANCER" ! So please never let those two beautiful girls of ours ever think i daddy didn't love them and don't let them ever forget me even while im dead and gone! thank you Julie 143510

COMMENTS

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Zilaheteb
08:17 Feb 01 2009

The most important word you entered above is the word "live" you know forest hand how fragile life is...regardless of daily struggles, find away totruly live for yourself, you deserve it.

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fadedRose
04:19 Feb 14 2009

oh wow . . this was amazing to read . . im gald u found someone . . their is always someone there waiting for u . . .; )

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xxTiff666xx
22:43 Mar 04 2009

Look i just want to let u know divorce gets easier over time it might be really hard right now with everything going on but i promise u will grow and learn from it

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