Lately I have been falling asleep deeper than I have ever slept. When someone wakes me, I am disoriented and I can remember being awoken, I can remember having a conversation, but I have no idea what was said.
Sometimes I think the whole thing was a dream,
Then.. there are times even in consciousness that my mind.. Checks out? I just stop thinking.
I am becoming apathetic. Are my "blackouts" a way of not caring?
I get these mild shooting pains through my head, low, from temple to temple. Then I get dizzy... I have never passed out in my life. So I dont know what to make of the feelings..
I've never been addicted to drugs.
I don't drink.
Nothing should be wrong with me... At least, I hope there isn't. I have no health insurance...
Oh yeah, I should probably take my iron...
Going to pass out now.
Music: Bush- Glycerine
Tomorrow is another holiday.. Of course, I work. I am addicted to it.. It erases the void of depression in my life.. It gives me something to do other than sleep. It seems I have learned how to withdraw from depression and recognize it.. But I always slip back and have to start all over again. I need to be stronger. Recognition is the first step... Baby steps. Tomorrow is another day.. A holiday.. Of course. I work. I'll be off by ten. Off early! I am turning my phone off.. And locking my door.. And spending the entire day with my daughter. ^.^
COMMENTS
-