So it happened.... My little baby made her first BIG decision in life.... She decided yesterday to get her ears pierced. (I cried) She did so very well, especially since they did one ear at a time instead of both at the same..... she picked her earings out and sat there.... of course it hurt (like we told her it would) and she cried.... (which is what made me cry) but when it was all over, and she saw the pretty little earings in her ears she was soooooo proud that we had to drive all around town so that she could show them off to everyone. It was reallllly cute. She is still very proud of them and very happy that she has her ears pierced.... Why oh why do babies grow up so fast. I would keep her my little baby girl forever if I could but I know that I can't..... :o( I am glad that she is growing up to be a wonderful little girl though, she is doing very well with her potty training and we have gone to nothing but pull-ups (panties) now.... She wears actual panties too when we are at home... It is all such an emotional rollercoaster for a mom (especially one who is a hormonal wreck cause she is pregnant) It is hard to watch your little girl grow up but it makes you smile to watch her grow up and become who she is, and know that you have a hand in helping her make those decisions that have to be made. She is so smart and it amazes me to watch her and see how much she knows and learns daily. She is so beautiful, and as soon as I get a picture of her with her new earings, I will post it. :o) Yay for my Bitty growing up and making such a big decision (hey it is for a 2 year old) and yay for her being such a beautiful wonderful little girl....... (Yes I am bawling while I type this..... Tabby = emotional train wreck... lol...)
That's right.. I went totalllllly Blinkie crazy. lol.
It seems to me that life is always throwing a curve at you when you think things are going your way. I found out almost 2 weeks ago that I am almost 4 weeks pregnant. I am totally freaked out about this. Don't get me wrong, the thought of a new baby is not a bad thought at all, it is just the fact that when I was pregnant with Alexis, it literally almost killed me. That makes this alot scary. I have to give myself shots and all that wonderous stuff. The part that makes it the hardest though, is that my husband doesnt want the baby. He doesnt want us to have anymore children. I won't have an abortion, that is not even close to an option, and adoption is not an option either. If I am going to carry this child.... It is going to be mine. I want the baby, so I guess I am on my own here. That is scary too. Everyone is always telling me that I am a strong individual, and most of the time I dont see it. I guess it is the things like this that gives people that impression of me. I will figure all of this out..... I always do. It is my job as a mother to make it all work. Alexis has been saying she wants a baby brother, and I think this baby is a boy. I want a girl, but as long as the baby is healthy, I don't care what the gender is when it comes down to it. I hope she does well with a new baby around, and I hope and pray that I am strong enough to be the best mother I can be to both my children and love them the same. What I mean by that is... when my little sister was born, my parents truley forgot about me. Now I know now and knew then that when a new baby came there would be changes and that it would need more attention, but I was totally forgot about. I do not want to do that to Alexis, and I dont think I could. She is my Bitty, and I just hope this is not a bad change for her. There is way to much running through my head at this point. This entry is so jumbled it isnt even funny. lol. Blah... oh well this was just for me to empty my brain a bit. Sorry to those who read this and realize how jumbled it is.
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