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JinxHeartSmile's Journal


JinxHeartSmile's Journal

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4 entries this month
 

00:32 Jan 27 2017
Times Read: 126


I may just have to not watch the news over the next 4 years to avoid feelings of helplessness, woe, and misery.


COMMENTS

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Bran
Bran
04:46 Feb 15 2017

that is one reason i have not watched the news in a long time





 

Rant

03:07 Jan 12 2017
Times Read: 148


So today a customer threw there fries across the counter at me because they were "cold" and retreats back to lobby without another word.

1. Its the lunch rush. No way we served you cold fries during the lunch rush because were continually dropping fry baskets to keep up.

2. I cleaned it up and took the customer fresh fries, and he tells me he actually wanted a refund. I am not a mind reader- you should have said this at the counter.



COMMENTS

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Bran
Bran
04:48 Feb 15 2017

what an asshole wow





 

Something good for once

04:05 Jan 10 2017
Times Read: 158


Yesterday was family movie day.


First, my dad tells me I'm picking up my sister in the morning. I awake, say good morning to my mother as I pass in hall, and proceed to get ready in bathroom. As I'm leaving bathroom, I am informed my dad left already to pick up my sister. My dad returns home about 15 minutes later; he returns with food for everyone. We all sit and eat and chat.


My mother tells my father about how I was "in her face" that morning and that if I had not have stopped talking I wouldn't be ready and made us all late. I disagree, and my mom snaps at me she is not going to argue, so I shut up. I said exactly 2 words, no more or no less - "Good morning."


Then my younger sister starts a conversation about window shopping. I tell them about this custom show shop I window shop at. My dad enters conversation with the shoes are bad for my feet and too expensive. My mom makes a statement about how careless I am with my spending and said I was going to buy them. I disagree by saying I make sure all of my bills are paid before anything else and have been putting away all my extra money for the cruise I'm going on with my cousins in July. On top of that, this is a conversation about window shopping.


My mother calls me retarded in response, and my dad asks her why she is always trying to put me down, or telling me on daily basis how close she is to putting me out, or about how she wishes I had my own place already. I work minimum wage and I am a full time student; I have no where to go but a relative's basement or a homeless shelter. Plus, I'm paying the cable bill, paying them a rent, and buying groceries we share. I clean up after myself, and most of the time keep to myself. As soon as I can get my own place, I will.


Then at movie theater, she sits isolated from rest of us and doesn't join conversation about movie after it was over. When we get home, she spends most of day in her room with door closed.


Today, I organized my desk, cleaned my bathroom, finished my laundry, worked out at the gym, and binged watched How to get away with murder on Netflix. My mother has not spoke to me today; the silent treatment is nothing new, and not something I'm particularly bothered by anymore.


I just want something good for once. Something different


COMMENTS

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Numb

04:32 Jan 04 2017
Times Read: 172


So I made a new friend, but he never calls, only texts. We live a good distance away, so we have not actually talked since November. I have not actually seen him since then. Is it cruel I'm thinking about dropping him as a friend?


In other news, my current job has been scheduling me for a lot of time off, then calling me to work the day of. My schedule was already changing week to week; now planning seems impossible.


Classes start in 3 weeks. I'm not ready.


My mood has been up and down, but down a lot more than usual. Despite landing a well paying internship. That's good news right? I don't know; I'm feeling like I'm aimlessly wondering through life.


COMMENTS

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Bran
Bran
04:52 Feb 15 2017

i feel the same way am i walking through life blindfolded cause it seems every time i seem to get things together it all go back down hill again i find it hard to handle sometimes








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