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cutexbutxpsycho's Journal

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38 entries this month
 

22:53 Nov 28 2022
Times Read: 47


Killstar Haul❤️🖤

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The first of three orders from Killstar, this is all the stuff that the US warehouse isn't selling for whatever reason. They also have the dress in black, but I went with the plaid. If there is one thing I'm kinda sick of... Killstar puts suspenders on fucking everything. Skirts, dresses, tops... I dunno if they think it makes their stuff look edgy, but they're kind of annoying especially when it feels like the straps are literally big enough to fit over a giant. I'm a rather petite bunny, but... I can't imagine how having shoulders that huge is the norm for most women. It's like the goat thing... They make these gorgeous designs then slap a goat on it. I don't want your fucking goats, it's not edgy, it's annoying.
I've been sick for two solid weeks now. Not bad sick, but I've got this lingering cough. That's pretty normal for me though, I definitely don't think it's covid. My cat is sick too, he's not eating like he usually does. His kitty house comes in tomorrow so hopefully he'll be more comfortable outside. He'll come inside, and sleep for a few hours, but then he wants to go back out. I saw black kitty out, and about earlier today so I'm glad he's doing ok. I've been eating a lot of spaghetti xD I've barely had an appetite these two weeks so I've been eating spaghetti, and chocolate, fuck it,I can't be bothered to eat healthy when I'm sick. Wolfie seems fine, he's fretting about the future as usual. I just can't bring myself to tell him that if the world is fucked, it doesn't matter how much you prepared, you're going down like everyone else. If it makes him feel better to obsess over preparedness... then that's fine, I guess, whatever makes him feel better. Wolfie is a control freak, for good reason, and when he's not in control his mental state deteriorates so I don't argue with him doing what he feels needs to be done. Obviously, I want him to be back, but not until he's 100% ready. Besides, I'm enjoying the time with the kids, my oldest nephews especially have been attached to me lately. I might have to buy everyone a Switch before I leave so we can all keep playing together after I move. I've been getting back into Red Dead 2. I hadn't played it since... Summer 2021, never finished it. It's definitely not a bad game, I just never really got into it like the first one. It feels so much bigger than the first game... It's like with Elden Ring, it took me several months to get through my first playthrough, but it took me no time to get to end game in NG+. I also bought Story of Seasons on my Switch just as a sorta relaxing game to play in bed. Story of Seasons is just Harvest Moon under a new name. I don't usually go for games like that, but... Harvest Moon is rooted in childhood nostalgia so I love it. Harvest Moon and Castlevania are like my two most memorable childhood games xD Most people say Zelda, and I've never played a single Zelda game in my life... My brother played Link a lot in Smash, that's the closest I ever got to it. I feel like playing Fallout.

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06:21 Nov 28 2022
Times Read: 75


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05:35 Nov 28 2022
Times Read: 106


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08:29 Nov 26 2022
Times Read: 154


New stuff from DK🖤
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Couple hoodies, a dress, and another comfy thermal romper. Now I've also got two KS orders incoming, and a huge Rogue+Wolf order. R+R were selling rings, and necklaces for like $1-$2 each so I went through, and picked out like 15 of them xD Plus a couple shirts I wanted. I'm tempted to put in another KS order, but I'm trying not to buy stuff to sell... Because I don't know when Wolfie is going to be clear to leave, it could be any day or it might be awhile longer. But the prices are so good, and there are so many things I could buy just to flip... I'll probably cave, and do another couple hundred cause some of their shoes are looking really cute to me, and I haven't bought any shoes yet this Black Friday. I also haven't bought any makeup, shockingly. I'm really trying to pull back on makeup, and just get necessities, I absolutely don't need anymore palettes... They're just so pretty, it's hard to say no. Makeup is like candy, it's just so pretty and shiny I want it all even if I really don't need it. Maybe I'll get a new game. I'm just so fucking picky... I'm not interested in doing the visual novel bullshit Supermassive Games keeps spitting out. I loved Until Dawn, but I feel like... it's just been more of the exact same with them, over and over. I don't understand why horror has become a walkthrough of a genre. Walk your character two steps, push a button, and watch two hours of cutscenes. Don't call that a game, it's insulting. That's all gaming is anymore, more of the same repetitive garbage that people eat up for whatever reason. If you're going to regurgitate the same shit over, and over then you could at least give it any degree of difficulty or interesting story. Like I said, I'm picky xD I kinda want to play through all the Final Fantasy games, there are a few I've never played. I was looking at 12 recently, I feel like 12 is overlooked, but I actually like it a lot better than 13. I'd love to see a proper remake of 6, I always felt like 6 and 8 were much better than 7. Honestly, I still don't see why 7 gets so much love, 10 kinda sucks, in my opinion, too. My two oldest nephews have been here all week, gaming with me, and watching scary movies. I bought Gang Beasts on my Switch, and any game where we can beat the crap outta each other always makes for a great time. Still not sure of I'll take my Switch with me or not, I feel like it would probably be better left with the kids. Wolfie had a couple meetings with some potential clients a couple days ago. He's supposed to be resting, relaxing, enjoying some time off... Yeah right. Even when he was in Vienna he said he needed to check up on some investments. I asked him just how much he invested into his cousin's best friend's cafe... And he said that's something he'd prefer to talk about in person. Not that it bugs me or anything, Wolfie is extremely responsible with money, I'm genuinely just curious how much he put into it. He said the guy's family used to own a bunch of cafes around Vienna, but now they're down to one. And I definitely don't mind him helping someone out who's like a brother to him. Wolfie is pretty selfless about helping people who really need it, it's one thing I adore about him. He always tells me, "I know what it's like to be helpless so I help people when I can." He recently read the Batman: White Knight stuff after I recommended it ti him several times, and it really clicked with him. Reading really relaxes him. It relaxes me too... straight to sleep xD

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06:47 Nov 24 2022
Times Read: 182


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❤️

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07:28 Nov 23 2022
Times Read: 213


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When he said it, it made me think, "All things yearn eternally to converge."
What makes you whole?
Is it the feel of a soul that fits perfectly into your own?
❤️

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05:59 Nov 22 2022
Times Read: 261


Wolfie stayed up all night with me. He said meeting me that night was like hitting a diamond mine💙
The wait is wearing on him. They told him it would be a bit to get back to him about his paperwork. But he still feels like it's taking too long. That's the government for you, any government. Plus, it's the end of the year. And the holidays. I wouldn't expect to hear from them til after the new year. I told him that things will click together when the time is right, and then we'll be unstoppable. But for now... much patience.

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04:54 Nov 21 2022
Times Read: 304


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19:46 Nov 20 2022
Times Read: 340


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I've never felt more in-tune with Persephone xD

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07:27 Nov 20 2022
Times Read: 383


He said to me, "I want to keep you."
Forever?
"Yes."
Good.
"Are you sure?"
Yup.
"Even if you can't escape?"
Just remember, that goes both ways❤️

Only a yandere can out-yandere a yandere xD
I know I say it a lot, but I fucking love my boyfriend. He's so absolutely, perfectly my match. He's so... everything💗

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22:17 Nov 18 2022
Times Read: 430


Bunny ears and Death Metal🖤
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01:20 Nov 18 2022
Times Read: 465


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21:45 Nov 15 2022
Times Read: 528


Looking for a little house for my cat. He already has a heating pad, and usually he'd sleep on the porch, but there's this giant raccoon that's been trying to invade, and since he prefers to be outside, even in the cold, he needs a proper house. Occasionally he'll sleep inside with me, but he's an outdoor man, and I respect that. I've got his heating pad in a box right now, and he does lay in it, but he needs something more insulated. So my mom is looking at cat tents, which are kind of adorable. The problem is that my cat is a big boy xD He's not like overweight, he's just big in general so he needs the XL tent. My mom is going to be taking over his care after I leave, but honestly she loves, and spoils him as much as I do already so he'll be fine. Wolfie has told multiple times that we could take him with us... But I just don't feel like it would be right ripping him away from his home especially given his age. I'm not exactly sure how old he is, he showed up in 2015, and was probably a couple years old by then so I'd say he's pushing 10. That's not super, super old for a cat, but it's old enough that I don't think it would be good to move him across the fucking planet. And the kids would never forgive me, it's bad enough that I'm leaving, but taking the cat is too far xD I do bring him in for a little while during the day. There's this little black cat that has been coming around for the last few months... And my cat will be totally chill with it.
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Until I walk outside. At that moment he pounces on him. Wolfie says it's because my kitty is territorial of me, not the house. It's funny though, we have cameras around the outside of the house pretty low down, and you'll catch him on camera walking around, and checking out the cameras multiple times every day like he's a little security guard. But I feel bad for the poor kitty so I give it a chance to eat while I bring him inside. If they could get along then I'd get a house big enough for both of them... I just attract cats wherever I go, I've always been like that, if I don't have a cat, one shows up to claim me :3 And Wolfie loves kitties too. I mean obviously... My favorite sub persona is a kitten, you probably have to like cats just a little to own a kitten, animal or sub💗

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05:27 Nov 15 2022
Times Read: 566


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01:57 Nov 15 2022
Times Read: 591


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Wolfie fell asleep on the phone with me for the first time recently...
It was so cute... I couldn't resist laying there, just listening to him gently breathe for a few minutes 💗
Ok, maybe I'm slightly obsessed with my boyfriend xD
Since he's several hours ahead it's pretty late there by the time we've talked for several hours. And I tell him, it's ok, beloved, just go to sleep, we'll talk tomorrow, I'll be right here when you wake up.
"No, bunny deserves attention."
We've been talking like 8 hours...
"But Bunny time."
He'll talk up to the point of himself nearly passing out. But he knows it makes me feel so loved💗
Plus... he says he sleeps better with me around, in person or on the phone. He tends to have some pretty bad nightmares, but he's much more peaceful in my presence. I'm glad I can give him that at least. He gives me so much.
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22:09 Nov 14 2022
Times Read: 632


I was thinking, while drifting off to sleep last night, what exactly is the Greater Will? Is it form or simply force? Light is a big thing that represents it. The Erdtree itself which is a symbol of light and healing. Except, the Erdtree doesn't heal anymore. There's an item description somewhere that states the sap of the Erdtree used to be very valuable because it would heal anything, but it hasn't healed in awhile, at some point it lost it's healing power. And that really confirms to me that the Greater Will gives no fucks about the world anymore. I don't necessarily think it has removed all of it's effects from the world, but I think it's definitely not paying attention to what's going on anymore. Even the main Finger Reader Crone at Roundtable tells you pretty straight that she thinks the GW has abandoned everyone so it doesn't really matter if you do what it would want at this point, she tells you to do what you think is right. That's kind of a powerful thing coming from one of the few women left in the world who can translate for the last thing left that can possibly commune with the Greater Will, the Two Fingers. What the fuck even are the Two Fingers? Like the Elden Beast, they're vassals of the Greater Will. But Marika is it's vessel.
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So while the TF and EB serve the GW, Marika actually holds it's power, it's grace inside of her. Which isn't surprising since Radagon literally has the Elden Ring symbol inside of him, you can see it gaping out of his torso while you fight him. So what's the Elden Ring? Physically speaking, is it the collection of Great Runes you take from the Demigods, or is it also the actual collection of Demigods themselves? The scope of time in the Lands Between, it's kind of immense. There's no way of telling exactly how long it's been between events, but it's probably safe to say that by the time you enter the scene, shit has been going downhill for a long time. It's like with Malenia, after her fight with Radahn she fell into a deep sleep. When you find her Is that her first time waking up since fighting him? How long has it been since then? Wolfie brought that to my attention, imagine getting knocked out in a vicious battle, and the first thing you see when you wake up is somewhere walking up to you, fully kitted out to fucking kill you. Plus, her brother is gone, and without the Unalloyed Gold Needle he gave her to keep her stable, the Scarlet Rot has been fucking her brain the whole time she's been down. So... with all that in mind, maybe it makes sense for her to immediately go on the offensive when you walk in on her.
Anyway, what is the Greater Will? Is it an outer god or greater than even an outer god? Because if it is greater than the other outer gods, why doesn't it do better to keep them in check? You can hand over the world to the outer god of chaos without any known consequences because the Greater Will either doesn't care to stop you or it can't stop you. Is the Elden Beast or Two Fingers even still connected to the Greater Will at this point?
I also find this very interesting.
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Elden Beast vs Kos from Bloodborne.
Now I'm not gonna be one of those psychos that desperately tries to connect all Souls games... Because obviously there are visual similarities across all games. And the Elden Beast isn't an outer god the way Kos was. I'm just saying... It's a bit curious. I could see Elden Ring and Bloodborne connecting. I could see any of them connecting. One of the main themes of any Souls games is the immeasurable expanse of time that passes between things. Dark Souls 1 and 2 teach us that entire Civilizations rise, and fall endlessly over the course of eons, everything is an endless cycle, and no matter what you decide to do, everything keeps going the way it goes. The light thrives, dies then reignites, always, forever. You have no real control over anything. Kinda like life. Do you think it's a coincidence that you are where you are? The Universe always brings you back where you belong. You will always come back❤️

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18:24 Nov 14 2022
Times Read: 666


Hot Topic sure fucked up my order xD
So I ordered four items last week, I wake up this morning to my package having been delivered. Immediately I know... They fucked it, it's way too light to have all my items, there a sweater, a hoodie, a crop hoodie, and a pair of socks. The package I received is much too small, and too light to hold all that inside. I open it, and sure enough only the crop hoodie, and socks are inside.
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Still missing an entire hoodie, and a sweater. I message customer service, and to their credit they do immediately get back to me, but only to tell me that I should check with my neighbors, and this is obviously a courier issue, and they'll give me a refund or reship.
No.
No lol
Half of my items weren't magically misdelivered. I didn't get half a package. I got the full, sealed package they sent me, they just failed to ship half of what I ordered, and it wasn't even a huge order, literally four things. Come on now, Brenda of Customer Service, half my items didn't teleport or escape out of the package... I get it, they're treating it like a missing package, but I have the package, it's just half empty here. I'll take the refund, but for real, your warehouse needs to get it's head out of it's ass. This isn't the first time something was missing from my order, it happened with another order I made a few months ago, I was missing a really cute bell collar choker, and I let that one go because it was a stupid $10 choker, but this is like $100 worth of stuff missing. I think it's time to stop shopping at Hot Topic. I don't shop there a ton anyway, usually only when they give me free Hot Cash coupons every few months, so it's not a big loss, it's just mildly annoying to have to deal with especially when the CS rep isn't understanding your dilemma. But hey, since they wanna fully refund me then great, that means I got cute bunny socks, and hoodie for free🖤
I'm planning a massive Killstar haul... Like $500-1000. I'm really trying to wait til their Black Friday sale starts, but I want like... all of their new releases.
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Killstar is also annoying me though... A bunch of their new releases in the UK haven't made it over to the US. Now, normally I buy from the UK warehouse because miraculously it takes two days to get an order from the UK side, and usually over two weeks to get an order from the US side. Why it takes longer for a package to travel across a couple states than across a fuckinf ocean, you got me. But, I have like $150 in store credit on the US so I was just going to order everything from them. Except, there's a lot of stuff I want that's not available there yet. A week later, still not available. So that gives me another great reason to wait til Black Friday sales start, but it's also mildly annoying. Today must be Mildly Annoy Bunny Day😐
I know I probably sound like a spoiled brat xD I don't deny that I absolutely am. But if the fucking world could get it's collective shit together that would sure be nice🖤
But in a major positive note, I found THIS dress....
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The highly, highly sought after Bathory dress from Killstar❤️

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02:20 Nov 14 2022
Times Read: 706


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Wolfie always says he's more of a Kuudere... But I think my yandere tendencies have definitely rubbed off on him💗

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08:10 Nov 13 2022
Times Read: 730


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03:36 Nov 13 2022
Times Read: 765


My 10 year old niece drug me out tonight to a school dance... It was an all girls dance where they got to invite their favorite adult female family so of course she invited me. I can't say no to the kids... and since I'm planning on leaving soon I do all the stupid little things they invite me to. Besides, I never pass up an opportunity to totally embarrass any of them with my public dancing xD Wolfie is not a dancer, aside from slower dancing. He prefers to sit back, and watch me dance. So I also will never pass up embarrassing him if we're out randomly, and he's standing there looking so serious, and I'm beside him just dancing with no music for no reason xD Look, it's my job to make him smile, same thing with the kids. They act like they hate it, but they're still smiling. My oldest sister is the same way, she has no shame when it comes to dancing. We were talking in the car on the way to the school, talking about me moving to Russia, and she says, "I don't know about you moving there. Russians are pretty scary."
Scary...?
"Yeah, haven't you seen Stranger Things? They're pretty scary on there."
...
Well, that's based in the 80s. That was like... Soviet Union stuff.
"Isn't Russia the Soviet Union?"
😐
And it's sad because that's the general attitude of most Americans. "Russia is scary, the people are angry jerks, they just want to kill everyone."
No... I mean, Russians are capable of being as friendly or scary as anyone else. Sure, there are extremists there who hate anyone coming from outside the country. Guess what? There're people in the US exactly like that too. There're people like that in any fucking country. But the general population isn't like that. Most people, no matter where they're from, just want to feel safe and comfortable and do their own thing without bugging anyone. Then you get the few idiots who rile everyone up, and get everyone afraid. Maybe I should be afraid, but I'm not. Wolfie says there's nowhere safer, and I trust him, I know he wouldn't take me somewhere if he believed I'd be mistreated. He's getting the finishing touches done on the apartment while he's waiting for his final paperwork to come through. There was some stuff he wanted to add to the kitchen. He said he just wants everything perfect because, "Bun deserves pretty things." He's the only man who's ever done so much just because he believes I deserve everything. I just want him to know that I appreciate how hard he's been working on everything. I'll definitely have to show him all my appreciation when he gets back❤️

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Juggalette321
Juggalette321
21:40 Nov 14 2022

You do realize that over the last month, Russia held a vote with over 75% of the Russian people voting to launch nuclear weapons at Washington and that any US citizens in Russia needed to be arrested. Like this is a legit thing that's going on.





Juggalette321
Juggalette321
21:41 Nov 14 2022

The Russian government isn't even hiding the fact that they held these votes





Juggalette321
Juggalette321
21:46 Nov 14 2022

But again, like I mentioned earlier, we all know that Wolfie doesn't exist. He only exists in your mind. You've shown no proof that he's a real human being. The process in which you describe you will be getting your passport and Visa to enter Russia goes completely against how the Russian government state that you need to do it. Lawyers are never used and have no place in getting a person a passport or visa to enter another country, as passports and visas never enter the courtroom, this no judge orders the passport/visa to be granted. Also, in order to leave the US for a foreign Nation you will be required to show a US passport, unless you are a foreign national, then you will need to show that passport upon entering the US. Now if you're being deported, that's a different story, as it requires a judge to order the deportation, so it does enter a courtroom.





 

21:09 Nov 11 2022
Times Read: 809


Christmas goth💗💀
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New thermal romper pajamas. I love the design, I wish they'd made a dress with it instead... But I have several pairs of these rompers, and they are super comfortable.

Also got new dress.
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And new skirt.
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Just a mini haul from DK's pre Black Friday sale. Gotta say, Killstar's Halloween sale really, REALLY sucked. Instead of doing a sitewide discount like they've done every year since they started, they decided to do select items up to 50% off. And the select items were all garbage... So I'm not too hopeful for their BF sales which sucks because there are several things I want from them. Wolfie was supposed to be heading back to Slovenia from Vienna today. At least, I think he was, he text me this morning to tell me he was leaving soon. And... that he met a really cute cat on a leash in a sweater xD We're going to be that couple that walks our cats in sweaters, aren't we😐

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04:57 Nov 11 2022
Times Read: 848


When you sneak up on enemies, and catch them doing stuff like this...
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Full on licking her cleaver😐
The entire Windmill Village area is pretty interesting. It's full of blood covered women dancing, and singing, and closer to the top there are even a couple worshiping a Godskin Apostle. The Godskins... their armor is literally skin. So bloody women + skin armored dude... They're probably the ones making the Godskin armor, and possibly even eating the remains. Most of them are completely oblivious to you, the only few that will attack you unprovoked are closer the top, the ones doing the praying. Their eyes turn red when they attack so the Godskins probably corrupted this whole Village at some point. Further down the road you'll find what's left of the men from the Village, cowering seemingly under guard of dogs and Misbegotten. You'll also find a ghost that begs not to be skinned... so these women aren't just skinning, and eating the gods. Even further on you find more women next to a pile of burning corpses... And even more interesting, you find the Twinned Knight Swords in this area. Which I would assume belongs to D's brother... You find D's brother pretty far away from this location so I'm curious why it's there, things aren't generally just randomly placed in a Souls game, there has to be some reason. Maybe they were originally from the Village? I dunno.
There's also deep dragon lore that I didn't even fathom going into. I wondered why you fight the Lichdragon in Fia's death dream. Apparently, that dragon was Godwyn's friend, and became corrupted with death trying to save Godwyn. Ok, so there's his connection to Godwyn, but why do you fight him in her dream? There's also another dragon, that dragon's sister, and she's the one responsible for taking human form to teach humans dragon type magic. See, this is why we read item descriptions, stuff like this is right in front of your face you just have to read, and comprehend it. It's kind of mind blowing. I still don't understand why there's a dragon in her dream xD But that is fascinating.

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01:46 Nov 11 2022
Times Read: 886


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You have to admit... It's got some pretty spectacular scenery. I think that's one thing that really turns me off of the Elder Scrolls series... They're just fuckin ugly. You combine that with really boring storyline, and it's just... Well, it's kinda like with people. Let's face it, not everyone is physically attractive. I'd go so far as to say most people in general aren't to most other people. But if you're physically lacking you probably make up for it in other ways, being a great person, being funny, having a killer personality. But there are some people whose personalities are as unattractive, and boring as their exterior which is pretty much how I view Elder Scrolls. Ugly and boring xD
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Also how I feel about all of my exes. Wolfie will ask me, "Bun, you are bombshell phenomenal, why did you date such unattractive, garbage people before me?"
Look, I've said it before, when you feel bad about yourself you tend to accept the rock bottom lowest garbage people into your life because you don't feel like you can get/deserve any better. You cling to these repulsive, abusive assholes because you convince yourself that you'll never do better. Which is funny because I always had other guys, better guys try to tell me they'd treat me so much better, but I was so afraid of running to someone that I didn't trust would be serious about me because none of my exes tried to make me feel good about myself. They liked me being in the depths with them. But I don't belong there, which is something Wolfie helped me realize. I'm beautiful, and smart, and funny, and I've got a killer ass xD
And most importantly I'm so humble :3
Wolfie is in Vienna for a few days. His aunt was having dental surgery so he went to check in on her, and he's partial owner of a Cafe there with his cousin, and cousin's best friend who are like brother's to him. He called me while he was out there, and I love seeing him laugh, and smile with other people, I'm glad he's having a good time. Plus it's kinda hot listening to him speak German. Or Russian. Or French. Or even English, he's just hot in general❤️
Besides, he had to go there anyway to get me presents, mostly chocolate. He said we're going to surprise everyone there when we show up, he wants us to announce our wedding plans in person after he picks me up. He's waiting now on some more paperwork to be cleared before he can make it back. He wants to make sure everything is all good legally there before he takes off just in case we eventually do move there. But the only way that can possibly even happen is by straight up putting a lot of money into buying a passport for me there... Which would also probably mean giving up my US citizenship. It's a lot. But we're not worrying about that right now. Just kinda focused on him getting back right now.
I told him he better get extra chocolate for the kids... And for himself because if he doesn't the he'll end up eating it all xD I swear he's a vampire, he can eat 30,000 calories a day, and never gain a pound, he still looks exactly how he looked the day we met. Maybe slightly more distinguished❤️

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21:43 Nov 09 2022
Times Read: 927


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Testing the limits of sneaking...
The Nox are pretty interesting. There's the Swordstress and the Nightmaiden, which is probably where the Black Knife Assassins originated assuming the Nox are the remnants of the Numen. Most interestingly, the Nox don't worship the Greater Will. Their God is the "Lord of Night." You also find the Fingerslayer Blade in their underground city, a weapon that states it's capable of doing harm to the Two Fingers AND the Greater Will itself. That's some powerful stuff. Probably why the Nox were banished underground. The Greater Will is a God symbolized by light. Coming of the Lord of Night implies the end of light. So probably not something the Greater Will is too keen on. The Numen are said to have come from a land outside the Lands Between, and some people speculate that, that's because they come from underground... But they didn't originate underground, the Greater Will put their whole civilization there as punishment for their "blasphemy." So where did they come from, and why did they end of in the Lands Between? At some point they must have been greatly favored by the Greater Will for it to choose Marika as it's vessel. At what point did they turn to a new God?
I doubt the DLC will have any significant answers. But I'm enjoying my relaxed NG+ vibe, it's easier to focus on the lore and exploration when I can kill bosses in one try. I killed Radahn before he could even go into his second phase xD Which is kinda disappointing, but also pretty great. One thing I didn't notice when I first played, when you beat Rennala's first phase it's Ranni that takes over the fight. So... is second phase Rennala just an illusion made by Ranni? Because obviously you don't destroy her, she's still very much alive in the Library afterwards. But you also get her soul... That is pretty weird. It's kind of a testament to Ranni's power though if she can create, and weird a full illusion of her mother with her mother's most powerful spells. And then there's the amber egg that's full of mystery. In conjuction with a Larval Tear you can use it to "rebirth" yourself. Interestingly, you can find Larval Tears across the lands on disguised creatures, nobles that turn into trolls or bears or worm face guys. Really, anyone in game could be a Mimic. And Ranni wants to usher in the Age of Stars so is she also supporting this mysterious Lord of Night? Her power comes from the Dark Moon you see above Manus Celes... Are the moons also themselves outer gods? Astel comes from the Void, what exactly is the Void? There's a lot going on out there in space.

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06:39 Nov 09 2022
Times Read: 965


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Actually, Wolfie bans me from cooking...
Cause my way of cooking spaghetti is pouring the sauce cold, straight from the jar onto the hot pasta xD
Hey, I like it that way, but Wolfie calls me a savage😱
I'm actually not bad, but he's amazing at cooking, and he loves to do it, it relaxes him so I don't fight him on it. Plus, even as a dedicated carnivore he's always willing to make me veggie dishes since I'm not big on meat. Even though he'll eat steak or lamb every day... We really are like a wolf and a rabbit :3
His emoji usage has increased x100 xD He said to me the other day, "Your cuteness has rubbed off on me a little, bunbun..." Umm, no, it's rubbed off on him A LOT.
So why do we belong together? I mean, it's a lot of things. It's everything. You know when you meet someone, you get to know them, you realize they're the complete opposite of you, they're new, but so familiar. Like you've known them, and loved them your whole life, like they were always there, pulling you through, getting you to the point where you could meet them, and be together. It's impossible to explain. I feel like me with him, like I'm exactly who I always should've been, but never could have been without him. We're good for each other because we show each other the best, and worst in ourselves, and what's possible. I think you have to ask it of yourself, and of them several years into a relationship, am I/are they the same as when we met? Am I/are they better or worse? Am I/are they happy with who I/they/we've become?
Yes❤️
Like Wolfie said, he wants us to write our own wedding vows. So... That's something I'll have to start thinking about. I feel like I'm going to be an ugly cryer at our wedding xD I get so emotional when I try to tell him how much I love him, how am I supposed to do it in front of people? I'm not an overly emotional person, I'm usually a blow everything off sarcastic smart-ass. But... with him it's different. With him, it's Wolfie❤️

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04:08 Nov 08 2022
Times Read: 1,001


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❤️

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03:40 Nov 07 2022
Times Read: 1,048


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I forgot he has the apartment in Sochi... We could get married close to the water. I never saw myself as the beach wedding type, but if we could put it off til next Spring or Summer, maybe💗
I told him I'd like to get a tail, and do a mermaid photoshoot. He says that I make him want to get back into photography so... It'll be nice having proper pictures of myself :3

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05:45 Nov 06 2022
Times Read: 1,097


I was showing Wolfie pictures of the kids today. He said he's finding little things to bring to them. He says it's for my "bride price."
I tell him... beloved, we've talked about this, you don't have to pay anyone for me xD
He just feels bad that he's taking me from the kids. I keep assuring him, they'll be fine. We'll come visit at least once a year. It's time.
When my brother found out, he went straight to my mother, "You're letting her move to Russia?'
Um, hello... Yes, hi. I'm an adult, older than you actually. So...
My mother simply said, "As long as he takes care of her, that's all I care about."
I appreciate her support. I understand my brother's concern, my siblings and I have never lived further than 30 minutes away from each other. But... One of us should get out there, leave the safety of this middle of nowhere place. I love my family, but my place is beside the man I love, it's time.
Wolfie is still finishing stuff up in Europe. He says he'd love to buy his own private island where he doesn't have to deal with any more bureaucracy xD But even then you still have to, to a certain degree. I asked him just what he expects me to do on a private island?
"You could fill it with cats."
He knows me so well💗

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08:25 Nov 05 2022
Times Read: 1,134


My 4 year old niece was snuggled up next to me on the couch at around 1am, watching Tiny Cooking. Literally a show where they make tiny food in an actual tiny kitchen which is strangely satisfying to watch...
But Wolfie is texting me so she looks at my phone, and asks me who I'm talking to. And after I tell her she says, "Oh! Uncle Wolfie is so cute."
True xD
Then she stops, and thinks, and says, "I'm cute too."
Also true xD
My 4 year old niece is a miniature me. She looks exactly how I looked as a kid, she's very stubborn, only ever wants to eat sweets, and she loves video games and cats. Whenever she comes over the first thing she wants to do is play games with me... And then she laughs, and points as she gets you killed.
Definitely me💗

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21:07 Nov 04 2022
Times Read: 1,163


Among my favorite bosses...
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Dragonlord Placidusax.
Because multi-headed laserbeam dragon.
I love a boss where you don't even know what's happening, you're just frantically running away as chaos crashes down all around you.
It's beautiful. He's beautiful❤️
I'm actually kinda shocked at other people's hardest bosses list. Everyone agrees that Malenia is the hardest, that's not even in question. But Radahn? I beat Radahn so early, probably before I even got to level 50, and he only took me a few tries. Godskin Duo? Like two tries. Mohg? Two or three tries. Margott? Really? That was a one try boss. These aren't hard.
My top five hardest bosses...
Malenia
Maliketh
Elden Beast
Commander Niall
Placidusax
Everyone else, a few tries at most. These? Probably 10+ tries each. It's kinda like in Dark Souls how everyone hates fighting the Four Kings, and I've never had to fight them more than once per playthrough. As long as you stay on top of them, and kill one before the next one spawns, you're good, you just have to be very aggressive. That's part of a lot of fighting bosses in Souls games, you can't hang back, you have to go all in with no fear because fear gets you killed. Honestly, getting through the fucking Darkwraiths in New Londo is the bigger pain in the ass than the actual Four Kings, sane thing with fighting the Abyss Watchers in DS3, fuck those Darkwraiths. It's kinda funny, hey, Abyss Watchers, forever hunting the corruption of the Abyss, there are literal DARKWRAITHS just chilling right outside your boss arena, probably talking shit about you right now xD At least Artorias even in his sorta corrupted undead state was still brutally hunting abysmal creatures, you guys are just fucking useless. I do like the theory though that the Wolf of Farron is Sif's baby. I really need to play DS3 again. And I haven't played 2 in forever. I'm curious to see where the ER DLC will go. I don't think there's a more seamlessly integrated DLC than Bloodborne's, it just adds so much to the games. Though I do also really like Dark Souls DLC, but DS2 DLC felt... I dunno, unnecessary? Not great? Unlike most diehard Souls fans, I do really like DS2 even if it wasn't an especially great sequel, still a pretty good game. I dunno if I could see Elden Ring having a sequel, it's kinda like Bloodborne where it's perfect in it's own little package. The people pushing for a Bloodborne sequel... Just leave it alone. Why mess with perfection?

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SinfulOne
SinfulOne
21:39 Nov 04 2022

I also Love Eden Ring too its Awesome and Beautiful game :)





 

04:16 Nov 04 2022
Times Read: 1,204


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I never realized before how tall the Black Knife Assassins are...
It's not just that I'm small. Compared to other humans in the game I'm pretty average. But compared to Tiche I'm tiny xD She's my mighty protector, my favorite summon actually. Most people go for the Mimic Tear... which us fine, but like I've stated before, the AI doesn't understand how to properly utilize my character so... the Mimic just gets slammed whereas Tiche is her own independent woman who can handle herself without me babysitting her. That's my real problem, when I see my summon getting completely obliterated I always rush in to save them despite the fact that it's kind of their job to keep me alive. I don't like surviving without my team, and I've never seen Tiche go down, she is my Elden Ring soulmmate. She's BKA, so obviously she's the one❤️
Besides, I'm basically a mini, scythe wielding version of her xD
It makes me wonder though... In the intro it shows a picture of the Night of the Black Knives wherein the BKA killed Godwyn, and in that image Godwyn is the same size as them so why is his corpse, when found in Deeproot Depths, so massive? Tiche, in her summon description, was actually one of the BKA who stabbed Godwyn personally so... His body has also been severely mutated due to the Deathroot surrounding him, but still, why would that make him grow fucking huge? Like at least 100x Tiche's size. And the whole thing with Fia, why do you go into her dream, and fight the Lichdragon? I'll admit I haven't delved much into her lore, the whole deathroot thing... That's kinda why I'm focused on D, I know his questline goes more into that, and I dunno what happened to him last time. I think skull boy in Roundtable might have killed him, but I don't know what triggers that. I will say though, it's incredibly satisfying killing Commander O'Neil first try❤️

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23:40 Nov 03 2022
Times Read: 1,225


I found this rice ball plushie...
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And it reminded me of Fruits Basket💗
Which reminds me of this xD
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08:09 Nov 03 2022
Times Read: 1,262


American McGee...
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Has mental health disorder bunnies...
And a pig dressed like a wolf for whatever fucking reason xD
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I dunno... Kinda wanna get them for Wolfie.. Totally not just for myself...
Well, clearly the pig for myself xD
It's so cute and random.
Whenever I think of American McGee's Alice, it always reminds me of playing it before I went to school, Middle School at that time.
For whatever reason, I was always afraid of the Boojums...
Boojum
No thank you😐

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05:37 Nov 03 2022
Times Read: 1,297


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It's done...
It's finally over.
Such a long journey... And I have so many unanswered questions that I'll probably never get answers to.
I was shaking that last few hits on the Elden Beast xD Probably one of my least favorite bosses simply because bosses who teleport across the fucking arena are super annoying. I get trying to make the final boss more difficult, but... It's already a two phase boss, and teleporting away isn't making it more difficult, it's just prolonging things in a really annoying way. At least when Dragon Lord flies away he makes a cool re-entrance that insta-killed me on more than one occasion. Teleporting away is just like, oh yay, now I have to run all the way over there, no wait, over here, and now over there again...
Honestly, watching the ending, I do believe the Greater Will has abandoned the world. If you choose to become the Lord of Frenzied Flame, you get an image of what essentially looks like the Outer God of Chaos consuming the world. That's what the whole game is about really, deciding which outer god you'll be at the whims of. I think the Greater Will fucked off a long time ago, whether it's an outer god or above the outer gods, I just get the overall feeling in game that it's either no longer there or it simply has better things to do. If it takes a couple thousand years between for this thing to make itself known... I dunno, that's not something I'd be falling over myself to worship. I think chaos has every right to step in at that point.
Would I say Elden Ring is better than Dark Souls? Nah. It's a magnificent game, but Dark Souls is near perfect, and Bloodborne IS perfect. Still like to play the re-release of Demon's Souls. I've only beaten that one a couple times, and it's probably the one I know least lorewise. I've gone into NG+ to poke around, and thoroughly investigate, and see everything now that I fully understand what's going on. Plus, there are a couple NPC questlines that I completely missed out on, like D and Goldmask, so I'd like to see them through. And only two endings til I get my platinum. The platinum for Elden Ring is so much easier than, say, Dark Souls 3 where they make it mandatory you find, and keep in your inventory every single Ring up to +3, so that's across three playthroughs... And if you miss one or absent-mindedly sell one, toi bad, completely start over. That's kinda why I haven't played DS3 in awhile xD

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23:16 Nov 02 2022
Times Read: 1,328


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🖤

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21:24 Nov 02 2022
Times Read: 1,352


2022-11-02-15-56-27
White moths are supposed to represent good health, peace, and new beginnings.
I found this little one hanging on a ghost while I was cleaning up the Halloween decorations. So I left it alone.
The Universe can be remarkably on point.
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17:04 Nov 01 2022
Times Read: 1,392


Wolfie found this wedding dress...
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And he said this is something he could see me wearing when we get married.
Not sure about those sleeves... But it is pretty :3
He's so sweet. I think he cares more about having a wedding than he lets on. He'll brush it off as, "I just want you to be happy, my love, men don't really care about this stuff."
Some men do. Some men care a lot about their wedding, about seeing the woman they love in a beautiful dress. He said we're definitely writing our own vows. He's actually putting a lot if thought into it. He tries to tell me he just wants to be prepared, but... I think he's excited.
It's not that I'm anti-wedding. Like I said, I've been through four large weddings with two sisters so I helped set everything out, and clean it up, and all the cute little things go straight into the trash after everything is over. All the little stuff is so unnecessary. But maybe... me, and Wolfie, and a nice dress under a starry sky, maybe minimum, maybe that could be nice🖤

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07:27 Nov 01 2022
Times Read: 1,296


Another successful Halloween🧡
I didn't go all out. Just basic makeup pretty much. And freshly dyed hair.
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My baby niece told me she wanted me to be a Witch with her so that decided that.
I had a little freak out when some stranger came by, and picked up my cat... My cat is an extention of me, he's very sweet, fluffy, and happy, and people love him, and that's great.
But don't pick him up😐
I tried to be cool, but eventually, after this unknown woman held onto him for like 30+ seconds I walked over like, um, yeah, that's mine, put him down xD
I don't fucking trust anyone. My overprotectiveness is not limited to Wolfie.
We had a lot of people though. If it's my last Halloween here then it was well spent. That's one thing about moving to another country that I'm not crazy about, the lack of Halloween celebration. But it's only a day so... I can live without it.
I also had lots of pretty things come in today.
This dress being a big one.
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Interestingly, this dress came in it's own garment bag...
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Which, honestly, I love as much as the dress.

Then we've got my Killstar stuff.
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Although, I really like this outfit xD
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Cause occasionally... I like to be pink and fluffy💗

So it's November... Wolfie says he wants to do an Alice in Wonderland photoshoot. He really wants to take professional level pictures of me so he bought an actual camera for us. I think it would be fun especially if he'll be in some pictures with me. Maybe I'm weird, but I really wanna have like bdsm couple pictures xD Ya know, classy, not pornographic, we could hang pictures like that in our playroom. But Wolfie says he wants polite Bunny pictures too. He was telling me the Russian equivalent to Alice in Wonderland, and I gotta say... Old Russian fairytales are horny as Hell. Maybe it's just the way he tells them...

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