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feel crap
02:27 Jan 30 2007
Times Read: 649
i really dont feel good about anything anymore i feel everyone hates me and pushing me away its all changed and i hate it i feel i lost all my friends and no one wants me ive tried few times to find someone and i always get hurt or messed round when all i do is love and care for them and do what should be done but still get hurt. i feel my friends dont want to know me no more and i dont know why and when i ask i get told no we still your friend yet when i text or mail them i hardly get a reply anymore exept for few that ive either know years or just got close too but its funny i found out who really is my friend and who claim to be too it really hurts im the kind that does everything for friends or try to evern if i cant and unyet cos im so open and sharing not only with my things and money but my heart and feelings too and i been messed about to much and hurt unyet i still forgive and go back for more am i stupid i dont know but i care what people think of me and friends and thats one reason why i get myself in mess in my head on times and upset cos i feel im losing them or upset them for some reason im feeling like dieing more offten and thought of doing things to myself more these days i not that good and feel like i should be dead as no one wants me or thats how it feels and it really hurts my head and heart cos being messed so much and hurt :o( and spent many nights crying myself to sleep cos of the lonlyness and pain
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