The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

10/15
10:06 Oct 15 2009
Times Read: 789

Today I walked Leo in the midst of purple orange clouds and a deep purple sky with some stars popping out listening to Sinatra it made me think my journey was not all that bad and New York though will always be in my heart, Florida has taught me a lot.

One the rules down here are messed up. Laws like not f—king a porcupine to the rights of pigs not being in a cage as big as the pig. Needless racism and l mean of their own color to dating a person of color is a no no ! Heck I consider myself open minded or an equal opportunist when it comes to men. But getting looked at if you are with a different race you are a wigger or the other. Hell I have had gone to college and a African American attacked me I just finished her in three hits and the cop waited till I was done and he was African American. He laughed when he came out and said did you want to file a report on her? Looking down at her knocked down (and no I am not a ninja.) He said to her on the floor do I need to pick you up trouble maker or are you staying down for a white girl kicked your ass? I laughed. He said mame where did you learn that? And are you a black belt? I laughed and said no. It is a move I learn from a friend in NY to protect my ass and works better on men it normally takes two. He laughed hard and said she was in the wrong but I kinds of feel bad to her do you want to say anything for the report?

I said yes… Next time bitch you come up to a woman who had nothing to do with your sorry boyfriend telling you not to dress like a whore and wear something like me… Know this and know it well one size does not fit all and you need to get a new weave dropped her hair for I still had it in my hands. And also I am not a cracker nor did I sell your people to slavery the English did and African kings soul their own people for the greed. Also bitch I am Russian Sicilian Black Irish and Native Indian. Our people were taken away from their lands raped killed and put into slavery. So you can go f--- yourself. You never mess with a person who you don’t know and walk up to them out of anger for your sorry ass boyfriend was right in the matter at had. I looked at him and said next time you say something like that in public pick a black girl. Thanks. The cop shook his head and the black male did too. I was livid and the cop said are you okay? I said no, I am not okay I lived in NY city for 24 years of my life and never once had a person throw books at me and try something stupid until I got here. Hell the racism down here is disturbing and now you can take her down town for she is a serious piece of work not to know her own races back round.

Hell my sister is Chinese and Spanish so how waked is that? And my other sister is like me . My parents taught me one thing in life defend thy self no matter where you are. Frickin cows here are as big as the misquote and it should be the state bird. Over the Mocking bird. I also remembered the coven I created of different faiths and one that was vampiric. I reflected and learned a lot here. From dumb shit to Mickey mouse sucks and I need to leave this hell hole before the lay lines get worse. Florida is not going to be anymore soon . A change is coming and well I don’t need to be here when it happens. Yeah this is all that I thought about while walking Leo and then looked at the sky again …

Thought about marrying Jason it is a serious thing moving over to a new country not really knowing much of the language and not having anyone to talk to but his family. On top of that I was told I am not ever going to be alone that I will have a body guard at all times so I can never take the bus y myself I cannot take a cab by myself and hell I probably cannot sh—by myself. I am very proud to be an American not for the beautiful mess we are but we have rights that Italy does not have. Do I love Jason enough to do that? Change my world for this? I am not one for getting into wealthy families and having to deal with stuff I cannot do. I am not a vampire I know this with the other coven I was in. I am not pagan, nor a witch, nor am I one for taking myself into some princess barbi doll. I mean most people would love the offer I have been handed. I thought I would like it but I am not sure my heart can be tamed by that? I am not used to having stuff given to me. Nor am I used to such a huge frickin family. I talk to my sisters and maybe my dad once in awhile on holidays and such I used to working not ; not working. I adore Jason and his son and yes I love them but can I handle being put in a cage for the rest of my life? I would be like a wild animal locked in a zoo. I don’t think I can do that. Marriage is a sincere deep commitment. On top of it I am marrying into a family that accepts me however I do not like the fact my freedom is taken away and he does not call me and or anything. I am just not sure what I can do?! The man sends me a card a lion and one phone call in months that he is in the hospital does he sincerely love me? Or am I an object that he wants to tame? With all the crap I have gone through with on his hospital stuff I think I have enough of that too. He has more doctors then I do and I am not sure what to think. I want to believe he loves me but I hear news from his mother who is my best friend.

sighs why can't life be easy like the clouds in the sky?

Raja

holy holy moly finally uped a notch lol
03:22 Oct 15 2009
Times Read: 791

Your Status: Hellion (Level 73)



You have completed 12% of the next level.



Pages Viewed Score (Pages: 116,228): 70 x .50 = 35.00

Time Spent Score (Time: 19.75 days): 66 x .50 = 33.00

Base Score: 68



[ Bonuses / Penalties ]

Ratings (Ratings: 11,250): 68 x 0.0281 = 1.91

Database (Submissions: 10): 68 x 0.0003 = 0.02

Forum (Posts: 124): 68 x 0.0031 = 0.21

Profile (Rating: 9.738): 68 x 0.0150 = 1.02

Journal (Read By: 41): 68 x 0.0041 = 0.28

Friend (Lists On: 137): 68 x 0.0047 = 0.32

Blocked (Lists On: 0): 68 x 0.0000 = 0.00

Overblock (Blocks: 1): 68 x 0.0000 = 0.00

Society 68 x 0.0100 = 0.68

Mark 68 x 0.0000 = 0.00

Mentor 68 x 0.0100 = 0.68

Referral (Points: 0): 68 x 0.0000 = 0.00

Total Bonuses / Penalties: 5.12





Total Score: 73.12



[ Bonus / Penalty Percentages ]

Ratings (Ratings: 11,250): 2.81%

Database (Submissions: 10): 0.03%

Forum (Posts: 124): 0.31%

Profile (Rating: 9.738): 1.50%

Journal (Read By: 41): 0.41%

Friend (Lists On: 137): 0.47%

Blocked (Lists On: 0): 0.00%

Overblock (Blocks: 1): 0.00%

Society 1.00%

Mark 0.00%

Mentor 1.00%

Referral (Points: 0): 0.00%

10/14
02:03 Oct 15 2009
Times Read: 793

yeah that is baddddddddddd. Jonesing to be online so bad I am surfing basically to get on...

I am going through interesting thoughts

I am addicted at work to farmville on face book and lol vampire wars damn thing makes me late from coming back from work.

Work has been letting go of more people and well I can say without adoubt people are going to notice a floor missing soon. I am not sure what to think of it since our dept is the only one doing well.

So I burnt a success candle



Next thought pattern Jason . He had a double bi pass and made it throught that. Problem my heart loves him but I dont want to move to Italy and be under the rule and thumb of some kind of royality. I loose my freedom and I loose my doing things on my own. It is not so worth loosing is it? My freedom to be a bird in a cage with Jason and little Jason? I have been thinking of running out of FL and moving else where where I have no frickin clue but I am going to go on findmyspot.com and find a new spot lol. For yeah I can not be a mary lay person over there I cannot do abonne if I wanted to. If I wanted to do anything like that I could not for Italy does not have reps there and I cannot be the only one there :(

grrrrrr

Health I am doing good I am a 26 not a 27 like I thought I was. Pcos is being handled by the diet and then I am getting injections from the mean doctor machine like thing and makes a bruise everytime and he doses me alot and I can still walk.

Weird thing is I prayed with a woman on kcm and asked for direction for I feel like I need a direction to go to. Though i have many people offer their homes and such I am not into that I want to be able to live on my own with my mutt and cat lol.

work my manager has a male manager and he is well brutally but to the point so we get along well so far.

I wonder if he is the one who keeps leaving poems on my desk? Who knows



surfing on line is rough trying to get an open line is hard like heaven is not hard enoughnor living lol



huggles

Raja

10/4
01:05 Oct 05 2009
Times Read: 798

Watched true blood first season since Tori my sister watched it and wanted my opinion on it. I had to say it was like any other vampire movie thing. A human and vampire fall in love… Dracula and Mina, Buffy and Angel. Should I go on? Eh she liked it and I can see the reason for it a lot of sex or violence or a who did it motif. Not bad for HBO but really still shows campy vampire stuff and makes others seem like this is more real then the next. Sadly I find such things odd. For example Jason’s family loves garlic and lol it calms them down. They use oregano to cleanse out their systems and they are very spiritual creatures of the world they live in. They have blood dolls and or blood wine but they aren’t uh that campy nor that self righteous. Okay they live different then us but they also know that humanity as a whole exists and they walk through it not even being noticed. It is funny and at the same time odd. For they don’t want to be noticed for the movies do make them monsters and in their case when they dine on blood it is a mutual interaction of having one’s being inside of you. Almost like the Native Indians or Vikings did. Drank the blood of their enemy or prey and gave thanks to their blood god. True blood makes it seem like vampires are out there but really they would not drink that sh- if it was the last resort and clone blood is already out there. So I find it I guess less campy and more vampy. Yes it is a tad dark but really does it make the world of vampires any clearer? Not really. I cannot say that to my sister of course for she no doubt would be upset with me.

Jason I felt him today he was filled with loneliness and astrally I hugged him and just said I love you and miss you too. Just heal and get better. He thinks the manager that sits next to me likes me and he finds it too close for him to be near me but he is by his team now. I find it funny that he mentioned that. He thinks I would fall for a dork? They have him on some pretty heavy meds. He went through another surgery two days ago and his life seems to be coming and going it seems. One minute he is fine the next minute they have to do another surgery to keep his heart pumping right. And his heart actually still had led poisoning from 6 months back. SO they have to flush out his system again. And that is going to hurt him and I know it. Last time they drugged him to a coma like state and well it worked but it hurt him in the end for they did not see it in time.

Marilyn is not taking it well either. I for warned her about the blood moon and the blue moon coming up before the oak moon and she just looked at me like yes it does make them more angered and freaked out.

Missed Omi badly today for some reason she was on my mind. SO I made zucchini soup and then baked some cookies . I think I miss her for my dad’s letter came and said your health is more important then a a dress. I think He thinks Jason is going to die. And yes I have been focusing on my health. However , I just don’t know how to sleep with his words haunting me. If Omi was here she would have a clear answer for me . Do I leave for Italy in three months and not know a soul but Dezzy and Marilyn? I will be in the midst of beings that either don’t like the union and mixing of human and their kind. I think they are more afraid of me if Marilyn does die before Jason for I would be taking care of business and they would not like it at all if a human was working their world to fit them not the other way around.

They cannot even find out my family tree lol which is understood. My mother was adopted and then well I m a mutt.



raja

10/3
01:42 Oct 04 2009
Times Read: 802




Spiritually

Some people don’t realize the moon affects you on levels that you need to stay at home and not move from prayer an meditation for two month thing. Harvest moon in September and the Blood moon which is tomorrow.

Normally I am more talktative but when it comes to magic and craft, and spells and such these are the darkest days of one’s soul. . Many see the Harvest moon as being fruitful. The way I was raised it meant something else. It is a harvesting of sorts but not like most do. A lot of blood letting happens. The urge to resist the nature of the beast is high.

The blood moon makes you more hungry for blood or eating food or for that matter argue fight and more. It is a violent moon. But some see this moon as a positive thing too. If you were raised as I was tomorrow is not a good day or night. To say the least. Even though I don’t practice the rites that burn in my flesh . The message is clear in my blood . My family created me with a purpose that none not even they had known for sure. I have no patience for people at this point and I find them sometimes more like a mess.

They attack for they feel threatened in some ways. In other ways they don’t know why I am the way I am. Coworkers tried shit to me all week customers and insurance carriers and more. Tested me and even some tried to confuse subjects like I should be guilty of doing my job right. I dread the blood moon for frankly it is violent and brings out the animal I am. I am not a demon nor shape shifter nor vampire. My parents created a human being with witch like abilities and were cat views you might say. People attack me I just look at them like they are silly. For the anger that spurs them on does not spur me on.

I laugh and they take it wrong and get more hyped up. A manager for explain argued with my friend about an item which was broken. He raised his voice at her I held Marilyn back for she was going closer in for the kill for she is vampire. I looked at him and said do you feel lucky? In a tone that is calmer than she was. He said what ? Nervous. I said do you feel lucky? For yelling at woman that way? I took my shades off and looked at him directly went up as far as his chest and said do you? He looked at me and shaked. I said in back of me is not a mere human she could harm you with a neck move. My suggestion is pay her and do not fight with her. The item is defected. He looked at my eyes and shivered and said what are you? I smiled put my shades back on wouldn’t you like to know? Just pay her and move on. .He paid her and looked at me and I smiled at him and he asked softly what are you again? Tilted the glasses to make sure he saw my green eyes dark with black rings. I said the wicked witch of the west, Dorothy did not catch me and smiled. Marilyn smiled but realized at that moment her eyes change but not like mine. She said outside . Really what are you? I did not look at her at all. I said nothing a person like you and me. She said but I am vampire . You are not a mere human. I said I am a child of a god and goddess that if you say their names bad things happen. She wanted to look at my eyes I took my glasses off and they were normal green. She said no do that thing with the rings. I laughed and said it is not a parlor trick. I cannot just switch it on. I sighed, and kept walking to her car.

Things like that make her wonder even her family the elders researched my name and could not find out what I was and who I really was linked to. They could not find anything but that of humans. No witches warlocks and more. (smiles) Sometimes I tell Marilyn a bit about my heritage for she really is coming into her own. But frankly she seriously knows there is a side her family does not have in theirs that I do. But two of their elders do have my blood; and know of what it is. The two know me well for some reason test me a lot and try to get me to believe I will be a victim if I marry Jason. Someone will die. Stuff like that. I growl them off and they run away. You cannot damned the damned it is silly and well my will is kind of iron clad. It is my way or the highway.

The blue moon happens between October and November another interesting moon many don’t realize things happen.

Eh

Work

People get fired for stupid shit and well I have to say Fmla people are not safe. So I am a tad worried even though I have all my papers in order I am all about some working it out. My manager tried a bullshit call on me and I looked at her like eh no not my fault . I totally admit to being late the other day for I forgot to log in. I however not consider that one a tardy in writing fook off and die if you must bjtc but I am not the one you are going to drown. They frickin fired people who have been loyal to them for 8 to 9 years and all excuses were lame. I was just annoyed and I was not a happy camper at all.

I have not made up time unless needed and I refuse to get sucked into drama. So what do they do. Stick a manager at my side who comes in earlier then me. Who got away with betting someone down at work with no worries. Freakin man thinks I will talk to him?? Hell you have a better chance of dieing first. The man watches me closely and watches everything I do how I walk and more and it is creepy. I was like dude stop looking at me. I have my mp3 player on listening to musically different music and try to ignore him but it is hard when he looks directly at you like what is your game. He sees the rock on my hand but that does not seem to bother him. SO I decided to be lol mean. I suck on a lollipop and do my work . when I take it out lol the man is uh a horn ball. Rolls eyes.

Jason feels it and I feel his jealousy and anger which I hope heals him more so then hurts him. He has been through to much and well I was not too happen about . He has had his ups and downs. But Marilyn wont take me to him. She says it is too dangerous. Nana even got attacked in town and well they don’t know me so why would they attack me. She said for Jason is yours and you are his. POUTS

Sounds like I am moving into a jail with perks

Holy watered the cat and dog and smiles myself for tonight is a bad night all together.. per nana’s request that was the weirdest bathing ritual I did to leo and moshe.

Eyebrow raised I felt like I baptized them. Shivers.

Jason junior is doing well at school and such so is his life guarded/ But he has a wee friend a vampire girl . Nana met the family they seem respectful and such but I was not too happy about them meeting. That is my child why can I not meet these vampires?? Taps foot. Basterds are hiding shit from me and I am not to amused with it.

Blach I hate being here and Jason and my son are over there it sucks big time.

Well I am off for ritual

I am alive and kicking

Raja