Four years ago I bought myself a bottle of scotch. It was a splurge at the time, because financially things were difficult. But I felt I needed something to help me through the rough patches, the anxiety, the stress. Something to help me unwind at a time when there was nowhere, and no one to unwind with.
I just finished that bottle. I guess I haven't done much unwinding. Or maybe I just don't look toward alcohol for that anymore.
Anyone who remembers my traveling days knows I spend most of them drinking, and trying to numb myself to the stresses of my life. Those days are long gone. I simply don't drink much anymore.
The first of my birthdays we spend together, three birthdays ago, she got me a bottle of scotch. I wonder how much longer it will sit on the shelf waiting to be opened.
I wonder how long I'll be left on the shelf, waiting for someone to want me to be open....
Write drunk. Edit sober.
Let the writing begin....
There's no envy, or jealousy. But there was a benchmark I wanted to achieve.
I did it, and then some.
Granted I set the bar pretty low. For however high and mighty you believe yourself to be, the reality was, it was a pretty low bar.
Now my sights are set higher.
Euthanize the dead who don't know they're dead already....
Watching some home-finder show on HGTV last night, one of the house hunters looked at his potential new beachfront living and said, "Wow, you can stand here, and watch the sun rise, and the sun set, all from the same spot. Where else on Earth could you do that?"
We looked at each other in a second of silence then burst out laughing together while simultaneously saying, "JUST ABOUT EVERYWHERE ELSE ON EARTH!"
Well, yeah, some exceptions at the poles and latitudes from the poles, but just about everywhere else on Earth....
That became the running joke of the night. Whenever anyone acted completely amazed by something, we'd say, "And where else on Earth could you do that?"
We'll put that one in the bin with "You're tearing me apart, Lisa!" which is what we say now whenever we face something frustrating or disappointing.
83% of Americans identify themselves as "Christians."
Which means they believe in a god who is usually identified as male when gender typed. They also believe in his son, his living form, who once walked the Earth.
And what is the overriding theme of this religion? Everything will be OK as long as you trust god, do as he says, and give yourself in worship to him. What happens if you don't? Well, then you are punished with a violent, torturous eternity in hell.
Do as I say, or I will HURT YOU. This is what we believe. With no evidence any of it exists.
But we're all flipped out that men treat women this way. Where could they have possibly learned the notion that it's OK for a man to say, "Do what I want, or I will HURT YOU?"
Ladies... you follow this religion, too. You abide by it. You approve of the message.
Why, as a society, do we expect better of flawed humans, when 83% of them believe in a "perfect" deity that acts the same damn way?
Maybe if we want to change how people behave, we need to get past all the crap that they've been taught to believe?
Sometimes it feels like things are getting better. Then other moments, I hit such low, lows.
Finished editing the project from Tuesday night.
The longer project ran into a roadblock when I realized on final version the audio sync from one angle fell out by about a half-second.
It makes a difference. It makes 20% of the video seem wonky with the subjects lips not matching when the words come in.
So now I have to go backward about 10 steps and recreate the base video, making sure everything stays in sync, and then rebuild the final video.
Video shoot last night was again rushed and cut short because someone was too cold.
I'm not sure why she neglects my constant instructions to wear warm boots, warm gloves, bring a heavy jacket to put on between shots... if I hadn't gone out and bought her a winter hat for the shoot earlier in the day she wouldn't have even had that.
Sometimes I think my main purpose in life is to be ignored, and disregarded.
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