The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

Good mourning darlings, I was gone but have returned. I can't stay for long though, otherwise the bleeders will realize I am not present at the Asylum, and then good things will not be happening to poor little me no no. Oh well the plague rats can sneak me back in, in exchange for a muffin or two. (Maybe three if they're feeling especially anti-social)

Well my name is Lucretia Adele, and yes I am 168, I simply have a very good moisturiser. I take my tea with fifty-seven sugars if you please.

Feel free to come and join one of our tea-parties anytime, Rita Mortis and I can always make some room for you at the table...

Love and Bloody Crumpets x

Ima little tea pot short and stout...*wanders off laughing hysterically*