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Quote: "We who have seen war, will never stop seeing. We will always hear the screams in the night. Only the dead have seen the end of war". Plato
The picture below represents a fallen soldier,
the weapon is placed in the ground by the bayonet, the helmet is placed on top and dog tags around the stock, and the boots are placed at the foot of the memorial.
"Sit by the river long enough and you will see the dead bodies of your enemies float past" Sun Tzu.."The Art of War"
It's takes a lifetime to really get to know someone, but here is five minutes worth of me.
I'm a soldier, Born and bred. I stand at 6 feet tall and have blond hair when it's not shaved. I weigh in at 220 lbs and have blue eye's. I have half of my body covered in my own art work. No piercing, because they are not allowed. I'm very quiet and shy, if you met me on the street you would probobly forget about me as quickly as you saw me. I drink very little and I do smoke, I'm divorced and no children sadly. I go to college for aerospace engineering. My love in life is the sky and a couple of sheets of paper to draw on. I love all types of music except country. I love dark winter landscapes (morbid) I am well respected by everyone that knows me. And I cherish anyone who takes the time to be nice or have a conversation with me. I beleive that women are the heart and sole of the human race and should be treated as such. I'm not a vampire, or a gothic, I'm just a very quiet and most would say dark person. I love movies and to sit and read, draw, paint, sculpt, write, and however funny it may sound, cuddle with the woman I happen to be with at the time. I don't date very often because my life and job are hectic, and I don't really just go up to and talk to women. I joined VR to read about other people's lives and in some slim hope to meet some people that I can relate to in some way. That's about it. if you really want to know more then please feel free to ask me.
These are some of the writings on thoughts that I have through out my life. And if you don't like them then you can fuck off.
Nameless Soldier
I have seen many things in my life, Men and Nations rise and fall in Power like the fading sun on a dying flower. Being a nameless soul has a great pain in itself, one that I have come to love. Sometimes I sit and wonder how things have come to what they are and how they will be in the future and what it holds for myself or what I can make of it. Since it seems we are what we make of ourselves. I am nothing more than a nameless Soldier. And yet I have been called so many things. I was in a chat room last night with christian people. Some called me a baby killer for what I did in the war, others called me a hero, and yet some had no opinion on anything as long as it didn't disturb thier own society influenced lives. We as Mortals go through life passing judgment on others with no reflections on the pain it will cause that person. Should we let someones judgment on ourselves affect how we feel? I've been told that I could never ask forgivness from god and that my soul could never be saved for the acts I have commited. My soul, what does god know about my soul. Being a soldier is the lonliest life there is. Would you pass judgment on me? Would you shed a tear for me or my friends that died in the sand to perserve the way we all live our lives? Can I pass judgment on you for working in a grocery store or in the gap? We lead our lives based on the influence of those around us and women feel like they need to look like the girl on the cover of teen magazine to be beautiful, or a man has to have a nice car to impress a woman. But in my opinion none of these things matter for we are nothing in life but dust and air because we will take none of these material posessions with us after we pass. Am I wrong to follow an order to kill people to protect that influence for wich so many people base thier lives off of?
I wonder that if there is a god maybe my role in this life is the tool in which he or she uses to end others lives. And one day my own. But how does one know thier purpose in life. So many questions and yet no answer's. Ask yourself this: What is it that makes you who you are? and what is it that causes you pain and pleasure in your life. The greatest pain in my life is knowing that I will die protecting people that will never know my name. And my greatest pleasure in life is knowing that I died serving as a soldier, a collector of souls. And your way of life will go on....without ever knowing my name.
Loving Someone.
Have you ever loved someone that has not loved you back? Has someone ever loved you and you did not love them back? Someone once said that there is a fine line between love and hate and to trully love someone and be loved by someone you must know both of those things. And others say that it is better to have loved and lost then never to have loved at all..but have they tried it?
We take our lives like a grain of salt on the table in so many things. For some it's money, wealth and power that they cherish or love. For some it is material possesions, much like how so many treat the people that love them. And for others it's thier own lives and thier own looks that they love. I did love someone once, and for it I was hurt deeply. Not because I lost everything I owned and had to start my life over again, but because I was once again alone. If you are trully loved by someone and do not love them back, do not lead them on becuase of what they can do for you, or what they give you. And if you are the one that is loving someone and are not getting loved back. then don't stay in a vampire relationship letting them suck the flame that burns inside you untill it goes out. See after the war I was stationed here in Korea, My wife had left me after only 2 weeks of being here. Taking everything I owned and eithier pawning it or throwing it away, I was deeply hurt. Not because I lost my material possesions that are replacable. But because I would no longer be able to have a warm body next to me in the morning, because I would no longer be able to talk with someone so lovingly, or any of the other things that all of you who are reading this do everyday with the person that you love. Some of the most precious things in life we pass up or lose and don't realize it untill it's too late. I was lucky enough not to pass mine up, but I still lost her. The one thing that I miss most in my life is not being able to lay down next to a beautiful woman. Not to make love to, although that is a pleasure. But to just lay there and sleep or talk. And as foolish as it may sound reading on what I wish for, you can judge me or mock me on my words..ask yourself this: What is it that you love the most about the person that you love..And what would you miss if you had lost them?
"Clicks"
I'm assuming that most people who are reading this have felt lost at one point in thier lives or another, or have felt like an outkast of society with no friends and nowhere to turn to. What is it in ourselves that makes us feel like we need to be accepted by those around us or that we need friends to live a healthy life or be productive. If you sit somewhere long enough you will see all kinds of life pass you by..like people that wear Abercrombe clothes and carry around a starbucks coffee cup because they want to convey a certain trendy image and be accepted and loved by all in the "popular" group. Or the teen pop idol girl who is a head cheerleader in school and dated the captain of the football team screwing him behind the bleachers and going out at night to parties being cherished by all, and she was the only one who knew that on her darker side she went into the bathroom to snort a line of coke then power her nose and go back out into the world to uphold a society influenced image of Britney Spears. It is funny how life can change so many things so quickly. Go back to that teen pop idol girl ten years from now, and she will probobly be strung out on drugs, supporting 2 kids from the football captain who has since gone off to college with hopes of being in the NFL, and she will probobly be working in a convienence store for minimun wage and hiding or feeling embarrased when she see's all of her high school classmates coming in and seeing what she has become.
The whole point in this writing is to show that it doesn't matter if we are accepted or loved by all and that we should not waste time in our lives trying to convey a certain image about ourselves so that others will like us or accept us into thier "clicks". Dress how you want to dress because you want to dress like that, not others. Do not change who you really are or be something you aren't so that Society will think your acceptable. You really only have 3 real friends in your entire lifetime. And if people will not be your friend based on the way you dress or think, then fuck'em. I don't need anybody telling me I'm not acceptable to society or thier "click" because I choose to wear different clothes than them. Ever sit and watch the girl who dressed different than everybody else, maybe in Victorian black dresses and corsets with black lip stick? Maybe you were a kid in the popular "click" that passed judgment on her thinking she was a whore or did alot of drugs based on the way she dressed. And now you dress the same way perhaps. She might have ended up strung out on drugs, but she could also be a self employed artist living out her life the way she wants to, or working in a tat shop doing something that she loves instead of working in an office job that she would hate doing but only doing it because it pays well. My father once said to me to do what it is in your life that makes you happy and the Money will follow.
Be yourself.
The pictures below are some of my Photography and Paintings.
| Member Since: | Nov 19, 2004 |
| Last Login: | Jan 08, 2010 |
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