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I am not going to apologize for my emotions or the words that spill out from my charged thoughts any longer. I will not hide behind excuses, nor try to explain things away. Wrestle with pain for your life, as well as silence, and perhaps, you might very understand a little of my true self.

I am neither of light nor darkness. Consider me a part of the blur without attachment as well as much as a part of both. I am myself. I know who I am, have accepted the worst of my shadow selves, and am of what ever label you choose to call me or take.

Thank you to those who once tried to help or comfort me on here. Dear enemies, precious friends, and strangers, you gave me the knowledge of knowing what it is like to be both fully disgusted and comfortable with one's self. I am a stubborn woman, a seeker always, and I will never want to repay the pain that I have been given. But, on the same point, without my encounters and lessons, I would never have opened up. I learned to love through the gifts of every person I've come across. Whether you meant it or not, you are all precious memories that taught me to live as well as to die.